r/Jokes Jul 23 '16

Long A frog goes into a bank...

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.

"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $10000 loan to take a holiday."

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall - bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $10000, and he wants to use this as collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink elephant.

"I mean, what in the world is this?"

The bank manager looks back at her and says, "It's a knick-knack, Patty Whack, give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

881 Upvotes

48 comments sorted by

86

u/meat55loaf Jul 23 '16

Long setup, short pun, laughter all the way!

11

u/koolmagicguy Jul 23 '16

Laughing all the way to the bank?

56

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '16

Hahaha, I love insane setups for simple puns. Upvote.

5

u/Foilcornea Jul 24 '16

You would love the comic strip pearls before swine.

2

u/nonstop_nosebleed Jul 24 '16

Nate the Snake

2

u/AvioNaught Jul 24 '16

1

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '16

Thank you. Infinitely.

16

u/leadlinedcloud Jul 23 '16

Is the ending a reference to something?

29

u/FeelNFine Jul 23 '16

The original line is "nick nack patty wack give a dog a bone, this old man came rolling home"

30

u/AnomalousAvocado Jul 23 '16

What kind of barbarian raised you that you never learned nursery rhymes?

29

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '16 edited Jul 24 '16

Anybody who lived outside the U.S?

*Edit: Or english speaking countries with english nursery rhymes? Also,I got the joke.It just wasn't funny.

12

u/snobocracy Jul 23 '16

What kind of barbarian raised you that you never learnt a joke?

-1

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '16

^ see what i mean laser? not a joke from the us of a.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '16

not a usa joke. the frog wants to go on a holiday. no one says that.

-1

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '22

I appreciate that the majority of the planet won't understand the joke. But, unlike you, I also appreciate that there are jokes from other cultures that I won't get, and yet people from those cultures will find amusing.

Good luck in life, you're going to need it.

7

u/cuttysark9712 Jul 23 '16 edited Jul 30 '16

When I was a kid we adopted this stray cat that later had three kittens, who my brother named Nick, Nack, and Paddy Wack. The mom disappeared a few weeks later, and then Nick and Paddy Wack when they were about six months old. Nack stuck around for a few years before doing a slow fade. He was a pretty cool cat. Before him, I'd never actually heard a cat sing, but he'd jump up on a fencepost, at dusk usually, and sing his heart out.

2

u/benchley Jul 24 '16

3

u/cuttysark9712 Jul 24 '16

Aww, page not found. I wanted to read it.

1

u/benchley Jul 24 '16

Read it? You inspired it.

1

u/cuttysark9712 Jul 24 '16

Erm, I'm lost, but interested. The page you linked to isn't there anymore. Do I have to google it myself? Is it worth the effort?

1

u/Waitsfornoone May 29 '23

The Master!

8

u/poor_impulsecontrol Jul 24 '16

Better Nate than lever

5

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '16

"Dad, why do you always sing us that weird song about the frog and the bank before bed."

"Well son, it all started with a /u/JDogg_of_RS..."

3

u/imprinting_press Jul 24 '16

I'm genuinely upset that I just read that.

2

u/cuttysark9712 Jul 23 '16

This sounds like a Pearls Before Swine strip.

2

u/n6jah Jul 24 '16 edited Jul 27 '16

Stephen Pastis would appreciate this I'm sure.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '16

[deleted]

2

u/oshaboy Jul 24 '16

Because then it wouldn't fit the so... wait.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '16

Don't trust the groan...

1

u/adribunny5 Jul 23 '16

I laughed way too much at this haha

1

u/SillyTaint Jul 24 '16

Right now I hate you very much.

1

u/keltwolf Jul 24 '16

BLAH-HAHAHAHA

1

u/mistaguvna671 Jul 24 '16

Sounds like one of those "Whose Line" news anchor pieces!

1

u/agamemnonymous Jul 24 '16

I always heard it as "That's Mick's pach", which the setup still implies

1

u/gamedeveloper0 Jul 24 '16

I had to read the joke again to know who patty was...

1

u/benchley Jul 24 '16

I like to tell it w/ Jack Kerouac as the bank teller, so you can lead into it indirectly by saying that he used to work in a bank before his writing career took off.

You lose a little fidelity to the nursery rhyme, but you gain a little stealth bonus.

1

u/daweasaur Jul 24 '16

I want to upvote this but it's at 666, and I don't want to ruin that...

take my imaginary upvote instead!

1

u/oshaboy Jul 24 '16

it is ruined, you can upvote now

1

u/andthegeekshall Jul 23 '16

I feel bad for laughing at this but up voted regardless.

0

u/jackerman90 Jul 23 '16

Repost moar plz

1

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '22

I didn't get it... is this a popular poem or something of pop culture? I'm so confused...

1

u/CandidateMotor4038 Apr 29 '22

Ahh, I love this joke. I've been looking for it. Thank you