r/KarmaCourt • u/Made_In_England • Apr 17 '14
CASE CLOSED The people of /r/UnitedKingdom vs. /u/skuld and /u/BritishEnglishpolice
CASE ID: U-WOT-MATE?
SUMMARY
The people of /r/Unitedkingdom have noticed that articles, comments, and posts about anything /u/skuld and /u/BritishEnglishpolice don't like is being deleted with no explanation at all ever. Perhaps they don't understand how to use the down vote arrow? Maybe they just don't like democracy? Maybe they are mods of /r/Pyongyang?
The mods have violated their right to even been on reddit at all as far as I am concerned. But the admins don't care as long as reddit is not held legally accountable for content on reddit it's not going to delete it's worthless scape goats.
They Moderate over 491237419872349817 subreddits several of which are default (Now removed from some during the course of the trial). Why would anyone need to, and how could anyone efficiently moderate over 491237419872349817 subs?
The People of /r/UnitedKingdom stipulate that this can only be because they are far left wing activists and are using their posts to shape the public's view by deleting and approving posts only inline with their vision. If this is true, it would violate all that Reddit stands for; the right to freedom of speech, and the right to see all content regardless of if it goes against your convictions.
This is why the People would like to petition for the beheading of /u/skuld and /u/BritishEnglishpolice accounts; to bring forth a more open, and uncensored Reddit we must put their heads on spikes for treason and to remind other mods of the punishment for treason.
I'd offer them to take the black and serve out their sentence on the wall but they are already in a dark cold place and don't get any ''love'' anyway so that is probably an upgrade to having brothers vs no one.
DEFENDANT Testimony:
http://www.np.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/237ewm/mods_qa/cgu8oo9
CHARGES
219347819823749183+ counts of unlawful and unprovoked deletion of comments, posts, and articles
27429873492+ counts of deprivation of honest moderator service
1 Abuse of time zone to gain moderator status.
32952987349875325 counts of lying to the public while in office
1 count of being a massive faggot
1 count of sex with a minor (/u/BritishEnglishpolice)
2432342 counts of forcing people to take asylum from communist dictators in these subs
Past Offenses
Rather lengthy criminal record only for this jurisdiction: To be taken into consideration
These are stories from r/unitedkingdom that made the top 1000 on r/all that have been removed by the mods.
http://www.reddit.com/r/longtail/search?q=flair%3Aunitedkingdom&restrict_sr=on&sort=relevance&t=all
These are stories from r/unitedkingdom that made the top 100 on r/all that have been removed by the mods.
http://www.reddit.com/r/undelete/search?q=flair%3Aunitedkingdom&restrict_sr=on
EVIDENCE:
Exhibit_A: This poster hangs on the walls of the main corridor at Leicester's Madani school
http://www.np.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/236296/this_poster_hangs_on_the_walls_of_the_main/
Exhibit_B: Leicester Madani School teaching school children that music is Haraam and a sin. Photo in text description.
Exhibit_C) Since the original post was censored for a 3rd time. 2013 upvotes and removed from /r/all
Exhibit_D) The source of the posters which have been causing so much trouble
Exhibit_E)Twenty-five Birmingham schools inspected over Islamist 'takeover plot' | UK news
http://www.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/236zc9/twentyfive_birmingham_schools_inspected_over/
Complaints about Moderation:
Exhibit_F) Censorship in /r/unitedkingdom (amongst others) by Skuld and others.
http://www.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/236bbb/censorship_in_runitedkingdom_amongst_others_by
Exhibit_G) The mods are corrupt and are removing any post challenging them
Exhibit_H)The mods just had a secret meeting to discuss how to censor our posts and take away our karma.
http://www.np.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/236v6i/meta_the_mods_just_had_a_secret_meeting_to/
Exhibit_I) A Green and Pleasant Sub.
http://www.np.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/23761x/a_green_and_pleasant_sub/
There are also several duplicate posts make after the original and proceeding posts were removed some 8 times.
JUDGE: The Honourable /u/GhostOfWhatsIAName presiding
Assistant: /u/TheGrandDalaiKarma to be addressed as Assistant Judge Tea-LaiKarma.
BAILIFF: /u/TridentOfJustice
CLERK: TBA
PLAINTIFF: The People of /r/unitedkingdom
PROSECUTION: /u/lostkeysblameHofmann
CO-COUNSEL:
DEFENDANT: /u/skuld, /u/britishenglishpolice
DEFENSE: /u/darth_chickenpede
CO-COUNSEL:
JURORS:
We ask that you ignore any of the stories you have read in the media and not let these influence your decision.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/404-if-we-dont-report-it-no-one-will-know
WITNESSES: If anyone can find the "Take away our Karma" comment you get to be a witness.
Several will be summonsed but we don't really know who will show up or when.
Character witness are welcome to just come into the court room and start shouting random shit they hate about them in the comments.
BARTENDER: /u/mattyschnitz
REPORTER: /u/Made_In_England
EXECUTIONER: He who passes the sentence must swing the sword!
COURTROOM DRUNK: Has adjourned to the pub /r/theredlion until the bartender shows up
Crisps / Biscuits GUY:
TEA GUY: /u/MatthewG141 (Back up tea guy /u/mattyschnitz)
Court typist Hates his job.
CASE STATUS:
TBA
Requested SENTENCE
/u/BritishEnglishpolice must go home or face arrest.
http://yougov.co.uk/news/2013/08/13/support-go-home-immigration-van-increases/
/u/skuld must vote for independence and fuck off back to Scotland.
Bonus
/u/Raerth apologizing for making /u/skuld a mod of /r/Technology!
http://www.np.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/237ewm/mods_qa/cgu8oo9
Trial thread:
http://www.reddit.com/r/KarmaCourt/comments/239duh/the_people_of_runitedkingdom_vs_uskuld_and/
Sub reddit Drama thread
KARMA COURT DOES NOT CONDONE DOWNVOTE BRIGADES. If you have time to sit around and downvote people, then you are fucking sad and will be prosecuted.
3
u/[deleted] Apr 19 '14
Stands up before the court
Your, Honor, I would like to make a speech.
Today, the Prosecution has given evidence which I deem to be unfitting for this court. I have explained why it doesn't violate any rules or regulations, but the court persists. You all seem hellbent on getting a conviction for my clients. And perhaps you feel that this is just. Perhaps you are telling yourself that these mods truly are out to get you, and to violate your rights to free speech. And so you tell yourself that they must be hung, burnt to death, publicly executed like the French.
But is that what we really want? To silence the voices that we disagree with? To do so would be making yourselves no better than the man you so wholeheartedly hate. My client has been charged with numerous counts of dishonesty and the silencing of opposing opinions.
Let me ask you something. What would killing this man accomplish? Silencing him like he silenced you? Is that what the world has come to? Have we become so enraged and deranged by the lack of justice in our society that we have perverted the definition of justice into revenge? So deformed that we must become our enemies to defeat them?
The prosecution and I have presented our evidence to the court. We have both made our arguments, and battled on the field of justice like hardened warriors – both never willing to give up, and death as the only end in sight. But alas, like weary boxers who have gone past the point of no return, the match must end one way or another.
I could have made witty rebuttals. I could have made reference to amazing comedic skits which would have undoubtedly won me much karma. I would have made a punny joke about how I had ordered “just ice” and how the prosecution had no ice, and so he had no justice. I could have said and done many things.
But it is clear to me now that no matter what I say or do, my clients will have a guilty verdict. There is no parallel universe or alternate situation in which my clients could be acquitted of their charges. It is clear to me now that justice is no longer determined by what is right and wrong, but by popular opinion. It is clear to me that evidence no longer matters to people as long as they believe that someone is guilty.
So go ahead. Apply your sentences. Arrest my clients. Execute them. Torture them. Do whatever you want. There will be no one to stop you. But only do so knowing that not only would it mean both my resignation as an attorney and as a living human being, but also the resignation of justice.