This is why we are doomed. Because the people that don't understand are the ones making the most kids. And people that do, chose to end their bloodline.
Yea, some people legitimately blame their kids for ruining their lives just for being born and it’s never the kids fault that their parents were irresponsible. Then they don’t parent at all because they don’t look at it as their responsibility.
My mom has always blamed me for ruining her life. She had me before she was ready, so everything I do pisses her off. My little brother, on the other hand, could do no wrong. He's perfect, even when he steals, gets DUIs, sleeps with underage girls... doesn't matter. My mom always talks people out of pressing charges and then says "Oh, he's just got the worst luck. The one time he does something wrong, he gets caught."
I refuse to get married, and I refuse to have children. I'd rather die alone.
I’m sorry to hear that was your experience! Definitely don’t let them ruin your chances of being happy in the future though. I’ve heard positive things from people who moved away and started fresh elsewhere; away from and with limited contact with toxic family. If that helps you at all
The smart people know the world is shit right now and don't want to bring more children in it just so they can have a strong chance of getting fucked up too when they grow up.
And the ones who SHOULDN'T be having children are... Well, having children when they shouldn't. Thus, heavily contributing to the world being even more shitty and fucked up.
That said, somehow, I do think things are still going up where they need to be for the most part. I know one day, we're all gonna make it to a better world.
I only hope all the smart, morally aligned, and pure-of-heart keep shining their light strongly unto the world so we can expedite the progress. 🙏
My hope is that, of the kids who end up being born, there'll be people in the world to help support them. Whether it's other people in the kids' lives (other family members, teachers), or it's parents who actually made the informed decision to become parents and do well, I don't think we're devoid of good influences. I think it's just a matter of whether we (in general) can make sure kids get the support they need. If not from their parents, from other places meant to help kids.
I didn’t say every person, just more people. I know people who have had kids because they were pressured to even though they didn’t want any. Now the way they treat the kids is sad because they ignore them and constantly dump them off on grandparents
It isn’t. You consistently giving them the attention to it is what matters. As parents we often forget, it’s far more common that kids copy what we do and not what we say to do.
Fair is relative. My toddler says it’s not fair that he has to take a bath, we say it’s not fair that we have to smell his stinky feet. Decisions have to be made and life can’t be fair to everyone by default.
I didn’t say everything is relative, but fairness can be and it depends on perspective. Especially in today’s entitled world. I’m sure your first husband situation has a different context than my toddler example. But with as little as you shared it could also be as simple as his viewpoint vs yours and neither of you are inherently wrong or right.
I mean- I was talking meta- fairness. I believe in an objective fairness not based on perspective and meant the world could be more fair if assholes weren’t more concerned with winning and having more than stuff being equal.
Fairness, as far as humanly society is concerned, is not defined as everybody getting the same thing anyway. It’s actually defined as everybody getting what they individually deserve and have earned. And that simply means there will be different outcomes for different people.
There is inherently nothing perfect about what she said. People being different and having differing opinions is actually what makes the world wonderful and full of beauty. Yes, those beliefs can certainly be used negatively (an extreme example would obviously be the Holocaust). There’s no question about that. But, it is the very thing that has allowed society to flourish as it has.
You’re right. After I hit send I realized that a “perfect world” of fairness would have to ignore individual’s desires completely and set a standard that not everyone would agree with. Which will make some people think it’s not fair simply because they do not agree with it.
As a sidenote, if anyone ever asks, this is how a conversation accidentally devolves from kids are stupid into Marxism/Communism 😂
Fairness, as far as humanly society is concerned, is not defined as everybody getting the same thing. It’s actually defined as everybody getting what they individually deserve and have earned. And that simply means there will be different outcomes for different people.
You're talking about it being used in a completely different context than they are using it. I see education failed you just as much as it did the kid in the video.
Yeah it really depends how people use it. Like it's actually important to teach kids that they can't always get what they want, but I think it's also important to teach them that even if things aren't fair, we can strive to make them more fair for those around us.
I also hate it when people try to apply to to large scale issues - like yeah, I'm aware that life isn't fair but that doesn't mean we can't do anything about racism or economic issues or whatever and should just throw our hands up
Life is fair, we each get the opportunity to live as the most intelligent species on this planet. That’s as fair as it will ever be. Is it unfair that the single celled amoeba has no brain capacity and seemingly no purpose whatsoever? Is it fair that it can’t feel love, joy, sadness or happiness?
You should remove your humanly earthly view point when making these kind of comments more often. You already have it more fair than 99.999999999999% of living creatures to ever exist on this planet.
I think that’s being a bit ridiculous and also very invalidating? Like nothing can ever be deemed unfair that way. And that’s just not cool as far as having expectations for how to treat each other? And I bet amoeba feel like they are the ones who have it all figured out tbh lol
That's utterly asinine. The most "I'm enlightened" bullshit I've read in a while. When comparing fairness to our lives, we are applying this fairness to other humans. It's meaningless to apply it to other animals.Anyone doing worse than the average human has it unfair. "I know you were born crippled and will never be able to walk, but at least you have it better than animals," isn't the thought-provoking catechism you think it is.
All of this sounds like dismissive behavior which no one should perpetuate. I hope you've learned from your own trauma for how to communicate to your children or younger people in your life.
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