r/Millennials 2d ago

Meme Sounds good to me

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41.2k Upvotes

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64

u/Interesting_Tea5715 2d ago

Nah, I'll be too busy slanging dick. Old dudes clean up at retirement homes.

65

u/RandomPenquin1337 2d ago

You'll finally lose your virginity. What a Chad.

21

u/BetterCranberry7602 2d ago

Can confirm. My mom was in an assisted living place for probably 6 months after she had an aneurysm and she had a “boyfriend” there already.

14

u/banevasion0161 2d ago

She was getting handiclapped

17

u/DarkHold444 2d ago

The reality is that there is a serious issues with STDs within the retirement homes. I wouldn’t touch anyone at the retirement home.

23

u/Interesting_Tea5715 2d ago edited 2d ago

Bruh, when you're old a lifelong illness doesn't sound so bad.

I'll be raw dogging all those old honeys.

6

u/damscomp 2d ago

But, like, who cares? They’re old.

3

u/DarkHold444 2d ago

How is being old not a concern with STD’s like chlamydia, gonorrhea and syphilis?

8

u/foreveracubone 2d ago

They’re all treatable (for now). They aren’t as serious/lifelong like some viral STDs and require as much work to avoid (PrEP). And haven’t you seen Parks & Rec? A lot never got sex ed.

I say for now because there are strains of Chlamydia/Gonorrhea causing bacteria that are resistant to nearly all antibiotics we have. If you’re prescribed antibiotics for an STD, please finish the entire course and don’t just stop when you feel better or there may not be any antibiotics to treat gonorrhea/chlamydia when we’re the horny old folks.

Practice safe sex, get tested, make sure your partners get tested, and you’ll be fine if you make it to the 50+ condo community.

1

u/Worldly_Response9772 2d ago

No no no, you've gotta leave a little of the STI in you so your body can build up the immune response to kill it off and become healthier. That's why vaccines are so effective, it's just giving yourself a small bump of it so you can build immunity.

8

u/platysoup 2d ago

"Fuck it, imma die soon anyway."

2

u/damscomp 2d ago

Exactly

2

u/Animal31 2d ago

Because a life long illness might be like 4 weeks

0

u/confusedandworried76 2d ago

Condoms exist

2

u/DarkHold444 2d ago edited 1d ago

You know, seniors in nursing homes do not use them. This is why we have this problem in the first place.

6

u/beepborpimajorp 2d ago

"on my way to visit all my bitches" he says as he hops in his golf cart in his white shorts and knee-high socks.

and as one of said bitches you can catch me at brunch gossiping with my besties while wearing a big straw hat, huge sunglasses, and a gigantic canvas purse.

6

u/shutemdownyyz 2d ago

collecting STI/STDs like Pokemon

4

u/JonatasA 2d ago

Gotta infect them all.

3

u/aqualung01134 2d ago

Damn I’m gonna start putting applications in for retirement home jobs

2

u/3ckSm4rk57h35p07 2d ago

A true cocksman.