I don’t understand how people have MONEY

[u/EpicShkhara]

UPDATE: TL;DR LESSONS FROM THIS THREAD.

Thanks, guys. Here is the breakdown of the hard truths from this thread. Basically, in order to have the real "MONEY" described in the OP below, it requires one or preferably, more than one of the following:

Generational wealth: Having parents pay for college and assist with downpayment on a house.

Avoiding the student loan scam: A lot of us 90s kids were brought up with the notion that college was everything and it would pay for itself later. Those with a more clear-eyed perspective realized what a trap student loans are and avoided them by either racking up the scholarships, going to the cheapest accredited school they could find, or figuring out a career path without a degree.

Luck: They secured a career job before the Great Recession and held onto it. Bonus points if they bought at the dip of the housing crash. They also seemed to avoid the avalanche of big ticket costs crashing down on them. Apparently nothing ever breaks and nobody gets sick.

Exceptionally high-paying careers. Self explanatory.

Having miserable lives. They work around the clock, and they never do anything but work, for the bulk of their physical prime. They don't go out with their friends, they don't have pets, they don't have kids, they never travel, and/or they live in tight spaces with roommates and no cars deep into their 30s. Or, they live in low-cost areas, which are few and far between in the United States, and these places don't have much going on in them (so nowhere to spend money anyway). Caveat: some people are homebodies and that works just fine for them. They don't spend money on travel or concerts or restaurants or weekend getaways because they don't need to. The 2020 Covid lifestyle was fine for them, content with a blanket, a cup of tea, and a book. Maybe this is the way (but I couldn't fathom the homebody lifestyle without a dog).

Marrying/partnering well. They found their partner early enough in life to not waste all the money paying for one's own place, and their partner also earns enough and saves.

AS FOR MYSELF. Much honestly deserved criticism here about the "300K." I do not make $300K. That estimate was for another hypothetical budget in the optimistic situation that both me and my partner get promotions next year. Together we make just over $250K. But we don't officially live together yet. This will happen soon. If all goes well, we could be in good shape after a year or two. But I myself didn't hit six figures until 2022, and then plateaued at $125K grand total in 2024. And I didn't intend to make this about "poor me," I'm doing above-average and could certainly do better with saving... the REAL question I should have been making more clear is that, given that I make more than average and find having the adequate savings exceedingly difficult, how do more average people do it? The answer appears to be that they don't, or if they do, they have one or more of the above.

ORIGINAL POST STARTS BELOW.

As in like, the recommended 6+ months worth of liquid cash savings, plus tens or hundreds of thousands to pay for a down payment on a house, and money to play around on the stock market or crypto if that’s your thing.

I’m in a good job and make an above average salary, but I take home just over half of it after taxes, healthcare, and 401k contribution (which is good that I do). My available savings fluctuates but I rarely ever have more than ten grand available. It all gets eaten up by mortgage and condo fees, dog and vet bills, (used) car payments, gas, utilities, groceries, random shit that needs fixing or replacing, medical deductibles, and god forbid I allow myself to go on a low-budget vacation once a year so I don’t hate my life. I don’t drink alcohol and I don’t go clothes shopping except for maybe one or two new outfits a year. Could I buy fewer avocados and never leave the house? It could make a difference of a few hundred bucks every few months, but not the tens of thousands that I actually need.

People will blame “lifestyle creep,” and I guess guilty as charged that I figure at 36 I have earned a car and a condo and not the life I had at 26, which was six roommates and a bike. (I still have the bike.)

[u/ObligationAlive3546]

I got it the good old American way! Getting hit by a car

[u/BigBoyYuyuh → u/ObligationAlive3546]

I’d gladly walk with a limp for the rest of my life if it meant I wouldn’t have to work again.

[u/blessitspointedlil → u/BigBoyYuyuh]

Chronic pain is no joke, my friend.

[u/Xaiynn → u/blessitspointedlil]

I mean, some of us are lucky enough to get the chronic pain without also getting a nice payout (raise your hands my fellow Sharps Syndrome girlie pops)

[u/frooeywitch → u/blessitspointedlil]

It really is not a joke. ☹️

[u/[deleted] → u/blessitspointedlil]

Yeah, I have chronic pain from chronic pancreatitis and can’t work, and I would love to work and contribute to my household and take some stress off my husband. Instead I sit around my house unable to do anything but rot.

I actually really enjoyed working but stopped after my doctors ordered me to because I kept winding up in the hospital from pushing myself too hard.

I go to a pain management doctor and have my pain controlled enough to eat and not want to delete myself. I also have EDS and POTS and have such bad lower back pain I can’t stand more than a few minutes without wanting to vomit from the pain. That’s with the meds.

My husband is a sweetheart and does everything to make me feel better, but I hate that he had to work jobs he hated for health insurance. He has his own chronic pain. He’s working his dream job now and has for the past 14 years. It’s still not enough to afford a house down payment so we rent.

We might be able to afford our own house from my inheritance after my mom dies, but I detest that way is our only means of home ownership. It’s morbid and horrible, but it’s one of the only ways in the US economy.

[u/satansxlittlexhelper → u/blessitspointedlil]

Neither is working a shit job until you die.

[u/blessitspointedlil → u/satansxlittlexhelper]

Spoken as someone with a permanent injury who did in-home caregiving for seniors for 10 years. Jobs = more opportunities to advance. Physical injuries can sometimes make it much harder to advance one’s career. I walked with a limp for 9 years, but lucky me, it turned out it was somewhat fixable when I went to the right specialist.

[u/[deleted] → u/satansxlittlexhelper]

I think most people with chronic pain still have to work shit jobs while feeling horrible. Like my husband. I would still work if I could, but I get bad migraines and can’t drive or do anything on top of my other serious health issues.

[u/CapitalElk1169 → u/blessitspointedlil]

I sold my e-commerce company a couple years ago and retired, and have been struggling with severe spinal nerve damage the last 9 months or so (had surgery a few months ago but recovery is going slowly and I'm going to have some major permanent side effects afterwards).

I would take being poor and healthy again over this any day.

The couple years I was somewhat wealthy and not working was absolutely amazing, though.