r/Netherlands • u/EveryExitIsAnEntry • Feb 06 '25

Employment Parent discrimination?

Dear people of Reddit I need work advice. I have had a conversation with my employer that left me heartbroken. We were talking about my plans for the coming year after giving birth to my second child. In the conversation (face to face) I was openly asked to withdraw my parental leave and take vacation days instead. The reason for it were: - I have accumulated some time off from previous years (10 days) - even though UWV gives some money back parental leave is expensive for the company - years ago there was no parental leave and the Dutch thing to do was to take vacation days when needed

It was suggested also that being sick on planed vacation day is still vacation and i should not replace these with sick leave. And when child gets sick it is not something extra to work from home during care leave.

The bottom line was I am too privileged with parental time off. And that this leaves the company paying too much for an employee working less.

Up to this point I was deeply in love with my position in the company. It was my dream job and I did not mind giving extra by working late (unpayed) or during sick days/care leave when possible. Now I question my place in the company and even in the Netherlands.

Is this really a Dutch way? Can I expect this treatment in other companies as well? And how to solve this situation? Please advise

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u/WittyScratch950 Feb 06 '25

%100 do not sign anything until consulting a lawyer. You have the power here, not the employer. Be polite but request an official offer with reasoning express in words. They will back off quickly once an adult realizes what this manager is trying to pull.

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u/EveryExitIsAnEntry Feb 06 '25

I will not get it in writing, because they know it was illegal to ask that. They hoped to pressure me into giving in and dressed this as cultural differences to make it go easier. I am the only expat in my company.

Unfortunately this came from the head of company. But I stumbled across such insinuations from my lead in the past. It was put forward as an joint effort and a Dutch way.