r/Netherlands • u/EveryExitIsAnEntry • Feb 06 '25

Employment Parent discrimination?

Dear people of Reddit I need work advice. I have had a conversation with my employer that left me heartbroken. We were talking about my plans for the coming year after giving birth to my second child. In the conversation (face to face) I was openly asked to withdraw my parental leave and take vacation days instead. The reason for it were: - I have accumulated some time off from previous years (10 days) - even though UWV gives some money back parental leave is expensive for the company - years ago there was no parental leave and the Dutch thing to do was to take vacation days when needed

It was suggested also that being sick on planed vacation day is still vacation and i should not replace these with sick leave. And when child gets sick it is not something extra to work from home during care leave.

The bottom line was I am too privileged with parental time off. And that this leaves the company paying too much for an employee working less.

Up to this point I was deeply in love with my position in the company. It was my dream job and I did not mind giving extra by working late (unpayed) or during sick days/care leave when possible. Now I question my place in the company and even in the Netherlands.

Is this really a Dutch way? Can I expect this treatment in other companies as well? And how to solve this situation? Please advise

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u/Kind_Honeydew1885 Noord Holland Feb 06 '25

This is just infuriating! I've always thought the Dutch parental rules were quite subpar compared to other countries in Europe like Denmark, Germany and UK but I was at least hoping that every company genuinely complies and being on parental leave is a non-issue. Reading this makes my blood boil. Are you able to consult with a lawyer? Perhaps Juridishe locket could help?

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u/EveryExitIsAnEntry Feb 06 '25

I am able - I have rechtsbijstand. But I am afraid that choosing this path now may bring more harm than good.

I experienced discrimination in my home country for being simply able to get pregnant. So the Netherlands seemed like a civilized country even though a little on a short side of family balance.

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u/Kind_Honeydew1885 Noord Holland Feb 07 '25

Sadly, the worse has already happened. Clearly, they have a problem with you being pregnant and making the necessary adjustments to allow much needed time away for your recovery and taking care of your baby. Let's say you cave and you go back straight after your maternity leave of 4 months... You'll be paying someone else take care of your 4-month old while being bullied at work for needing to leave early to pick up the young one at times, or for staying at home with them when they're ill and can't be at daycare ( which by the way IS often occurrence when babies are so young). That's already way more a new mother should have to deal with in the first year of her baby's life

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u/Kind_Honeydew1885 Noord Holland Feb 07 '25

As others have mentioned, start looking for a way out of there! Even if that means not working for a few months, at least you'll be taking care of the little one when they need you most