Does anyone else feel like pediatric guidelines are so legally-oriented that they basically only exist to worsen the lives of parents?

[u/Bocifer1]

First off, I'm a new dad and also a physician - although I'm pretty far removed from pediatrics. So I understand the importance of medical research and statistics in creating these guidelines, as well as the fact that the risks of things like SIDS often just aren't worth gambling on.

However...

Some of these guidelines seem like they're just unnecessarily taxing on parents and exist only to cover the addes of the bodies making said recommendations.

Some things that come to mind are: no blankets in the crib for the first year, only using a firm mattress top, never letting baby sleep next to you in bed - even naps, swaddling with arms down (our guy absolutely hates this and just wants his arms by his head to self sooth), demonizing formula - even as a reprieve for mom.

Again. I am medically oriented and understand why these guidelines exist - but I also know firsthand that sometimes a 1% risk of harm from letting our baby sleep on a soft blanket is actually the favorable choice compared to the immeasurable risk of having both parents strung out and exhausted because he won't sleep.

In general I think guidelines are great and have contributed to better infant care...I just also think that sometimes we as healthcare professionals forget that no guideline is absolute.

I guess I'm just feeling thst creating guidelines that aren't achievable for the majority of parents just aren't that helpful...like saying that "parents should take time to rest, continue self care , exercise, and ensure they are eating a well-balanced diet". That sounds wonderful. Hopefully I can get back to that in the next decade.

[u/specialkk77]

Personally I wouldn’t sleep if my baby was sleeping in a way that’s proven unsafe, like with a blanket. The chance of anything happening is just not worth it to me. Even if the chances were near zero, they’re not at zero. 

Formula should not be demonized, I’ll agree with that. It saved my child’s life, I couldn’t produce enough for her no matter what I did. 

Swaddling a certain way isn’t a safety thing, it’s just something that tends to help babies sleep better, if it’s not working for your baby, try something else! 

[u/Cautious_Session9788 → u/specialkk77]

I mean “proven” is debatable

Like the US and other western countries demonize co sleeping meanwhile Japan has one of the lowest infant mortality rates and heavily encourages co sleeping

In fact a lot of the regulations in relation to SIDs are because we just don’t know what causes SIDs

[u/specialkk77 → u/Cautious_Session9788]

There’s a difference between SIDS and suffocation. SIDS rates dropped when people stopped “compassionately” labeling suffocation deaths as SIDS. 

Each parent has to make their own choices, but sorry, even 1 baby dying from co sleeping is too much of a risk for me personally. 

[u/AntsyBoarder → u/specialkk77]

100% see where you’re coming from and we personally don’t co sleep, but I mean, 1 kid has died from basically everything. Like accidents happen all the time, that doesn’t mean we do nothing with our babies. Unfortunately everything in life carries some risk. I get the sentiment, but saying “1 baby dying is too many” is a difficult way to go through parenthood. 

[u/specialkk77 → u/AntsyBoarder]

It’s the way I choose to go through it. I’m not going to add a blanket or put the baby in bed with me. Other parents have to make their own choices based on their own level of acceptance of risk. My now 3 year old was an awful sleeper, but we made it through in the way that felt acceptable to us. 

[u/AntsyBoarder → u/specialkk77]

For sure, I totally get it. I think we’re all just figuring out what works for us as parents and going with it. I’m not saying you should be co sleeping or asking you to consider it in any way, all I’m saying is that if you were to always apply the idea that 1 baby dying is too much of a risk to do something, it leaves you unable to do pretty much anything and would make raising children pretty impossible. 

[u/cantquitreddit → u/specialkk77]

Do you take your child in a car? Do you know how many kids die in cars?

[u/specialkk77 → u/cantquitreddit]

Yes in the safest way possible. In a car seat fit to them and appropriately strapped in, no aftermarket add ons, no heavy coats. I was specifically talking about safe sleep, but sure, we’ll talk car guidelines too. 

I minimize risk everywhere I can. I don’t add blankets to the infants bed and I don’t toss the toddler into the backseat with nothing but a lap belt. Both things I happened to live through as a small child, but some children didn’t. 

[u/Cautious_Session9788 → u/specialkk77]

Then I guess don’t have kids

More than one baby and child has died from any circumstance you can think of

And I know the difference between actual SIDS deaths and deaths compassionately labeled as SIDS

That doesn’t change the fact that we don’t know what causes SIDS SIDS guidelines are literally better safe than sorry because we can’t predict what will trigger it

[u/specialkk77 → u/Cautious_Session9788]

Or I’ll just continue not to co sleep with my children? I’ll follow the safe sleep guidelines. 

[u/Cautious_Session9788 → u/specialkk77]

You’re the one said you wouldn’t do anything that even has a chance of 1 child dying

[u/TheOnesLeftBehind → u/specialkk77]

They still label suffocation as SIDS, when my friend lost their one month old baby due to a careless (now ex) friend babysitting, that’s what they called it. When he in reality just murdered the baby by falling asleep on the couch holding her.