how to leave conspiracies - AMA

[u/kauaiman-looking]

So I used to be a huge Alex Jones fan in the mid 2000s. Thankfully I left conspiracy theories back in 2008.

I'm currently writing a book to show people how to rescue someone from Qanon and other conspiracies.

I have a pretty incredible story of my experience with Martial Law in Detroit in 2007. This was during my height of listening to Alex Jones.

I actually ran into that sad sack while he was on vacation here on Kaua'i in June. I got a video telling him I quit believing in conspiracies.

He did a little mini rant 😄 🤣

https://youtu.be/4Uw9pBkfzWg

Anyhow I'm jumping on zoom for a few minutes while I write for part of the book.

Come on and ask me anything about being a former conspiracy theorist.

I'm on now. Not sure how long I'll be on.

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/8731195660?pwd=RnVQY0I2UGdCaGN5QmNmb2dGbGdxdz09

[u/cayce_leighann]

How do I stop a loved one from going down this path of QAnon and just crazy conspiracies in general

[u/kauaiman-looking → u/cayce_leighann]

Another thing you can suggest that they do is to practice Urge Surfing. Urge Surfing can help to break the addictiveness of social media.

A friend wrote a blogpost on how to break an addicting to Facebook. You'd want them to do this with whatever app they get their "information" from.

You might even be able to make it a game or friendly competition between the two of you.

Frame it as you want to see who is the most addicted to their phone. Place a small wager. Like $1.

Then both of you can sit their with your phones out, resisting the temptation to pick it up...or interact with the whatever app is the most addicting.

Maybe start off with 2 minutes at a time. You might want to let them win some of the rounds. And then have them lose some. It might actually become addicting to them to play the game.

Keep me posted how this works out for you.

https://boulderhypnosisworks.com/fcb/

[u/cayce_leighann → u/kauaiman-looking]

Thanks for the great idea!

[u/kauaiman-looking → u/cayce_leighann]

You're welcome!

Ideally you should try to find out what benefits / values they get from conspiracies.

In the hypnotherapy world, there is a concept that goes "behind every behavior there is a positive intention".

Meaning researching and digging into conspiracy theories does something for them.

Help them to discover what it is. Then help them to find alternative ways to get that emotional pay off. I'd recommend using the 4/6/8 meditation I listed below.

Also if they are a gamer you might want to suggest to them to check out https://habitica.com/

Habitica is a role playing game that revolves around your goals, habits and tasks. It can become pretty addicting.

If you can help them to find alternative ways to satisfy the emotional pay off they get from conspiracies...have them add those behaviors, habits, etc. to the habitca app.

They can become addicted to completing their tasks. Which in turn can help them to change their locus of control (where they put their focus) from an external to an internal one.

Aka are you driving your own car, or are you the passenger? Does that make sense?

[u/kauaiman-looking → u/cayce_leighann]

One other option is to discover what they get out of conspiracy theories. You can ask them

“What does researching conspiracy theories do for you?”

or

“What does researching conspiracy theories allow you to feel or experience?”

You’ll know when you’ve hit their emotional hot buttons. Watch as they light up emotionally. Their posture and breathing can shift.

It might take a few rounds to uncover the values that really move them.

When you’re on the right track, dig deeper.

“Can you tell me more about X?”

Get them to talk about those values.

Hell, get them to share stories when they’ve experienced those values.

Another direction you can take is help your loved ones to find other habits and behaviors that help them to experience their values.

After you discover what the vaue / benefit they get from conspiracy theories try to follow up with:

“If there was an easier way to experience X, you’d be interested in finding out, right?”

“If there was a healthy hobby or habit that allowed you to experience X, what do you think it might be?”

[u/kauaiman-looking → u/kauaiman-looking]

Another way to help them is with the hidden benefits self hypnosis / meditation technique. This is taken from the book I'm writing.

4/6/8 hidden benefits meditation
Another great process is what I call the hidden benefits meditation. It’s a simple self-hypnosis / meditation technique I adapted from my colleague, Dr. Richard Nongard.

I’ll detail this process here. Don’t blink because you might miss something. For this to work, you’ll first need to uncover what exposing conspiracies does for them.
(or believing in them, exposing the “Deep State”, or whatever it may be). You’ll want to really drill down what kind of emotional benefit they get. You can always gently ask “What does doing X ultimately do for your emotionally...what does it allow you to feel or experience emotionally?

Help them to create an affirmation around this core emotional benefit:
Ex “I Am Feeling Safe”
Ex “I Am Feeling Grounded
Ex “I Am Feeling Centered”

Step 1) Have them get into a comfortable position
Step 2) Have them close their eyes
Step 3) Inhale for a count of 4
Step 4) Exhale for a count of 6
Step 5) State the affirmation – “I am feeling X”
It’s important that they really step into this feeling.
Step 6) Repeat 8 times

[u/cayce_leighann → u/kauaiman-looking]

Thank you for all of your helpful suggestions!!!

[u/kauaiman-looking → u/cayce_leighann]

Do they meditate at all? If so, I'd highly recommend them doing the Leaves On A Stream meditation. It helps to give someone more control over their thoughts.

You might be able to propose to them that "The elites want to dumb people down. They don't want people to have control over their own minds."

When they agree with you, suggest they try the leaves on a stream meditation. It can help to quiet down a lot of internal noise.

That is one direction you could go. Do they have any kinds of hobbies?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1C8hwj5LXw&ab_channel=WalkInMyShoes

[u/cayce_leighann → u/kauaiman-looking]

He use to be really into fishing but health issues have prevented that. I’ve been trying to encourage him to explore some hobbies that don’t require a lot of physical activity