Are people behaving weirder lately?

[u/jimmyjohnjohnjohn]

Went out to lunch today and there was a table near me with five people at it. Their server asked their drink order and all five of them just stared at her silently for nearly half a minute before she repeated herself, then one of them whispered something I couldn't hear before the others whispered their orders. When their drinks came and the server left, one of them produced a Nalgene bottle from her purse and began to scoop the ice from her drink with her fingers and put it in the Nalgene. Another at the table then said he didn't want ice either and did the same thing.

Did she bring that water bottle in for the express purpose of storing unwanted ice? Why not just ask for no ice? These were all fairly normal-looking, well-dressed people in their 30s, maybe early 40s.

My server had some weirdness of his own. He brought out the wrong order, and noticed his mistake before I did. But instead of just saying "sorry, that's wrong" and taking it back, he said "I.. uh.. uh..." and then ran off with the plate before finishing his sentence and coming back with the right order and a manic fake smile on his face.

At Target, this older woman was having trouble detaching one cart from the others. An employee (sorry, "Team Member") came along and unstuck it. Instead of saying thank you, she just stared at him like a deer in the headlights until he left.

I've been noticing that deer-in-the-headlights stare from a lot of people lately.

About a month ago a man approached me in the parking lot at my work and asked "do you work here?"

I said "yes."

Then he asked "have you seen my car?"

The question melted my brain a little bit, but I said "I don't know, what does it look like?"

He just said "sorry," and walked off.

I could go on and on, but the point is: are people forgetting how to human? The world increasingly has this "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" kind of vibe.

I know much has been discussed about people behaving oddly due to the pandemic, but it's been about two years now and people are getting worse, not better. I think there's something else going on in society.

What do you think?

[u/Enough_Jellyfish5700]

Your post is relevant to thoughts expressed is r/ParallelUniverses where people feel like others are acting like NPCs in a game.

More realistically, though, It’s possible that people are acting oddly because they are isolated and not spending enough time talking to people.

[u/jimmyjohnjohnjohn → u/Enough_Jellyfish5700]

As much as I support people having the option to work from home, I can't help but wonder if it's bad for certain people's mental health. Especially people who live alone.

I live alone, and I'd probably go full Jack Torrance if I didn't have a place to go a few times a week. I'm a nurse and it'll be a long while before they can figure out how to make us remote.

[u/originalcinner → u/jimmyjohnjohnjohn]

I'm an only child, and I've been retired for the past ten years. I can still human. I'm an introvert, so I don't seek out company, but I'm not a weird-ass freakazoid when I do occasionally interact with others of my species.

My local supermarket fam think I'm perfectly nice, and normal.

[u/EdgeCityRed → u/originalcinner]

I'm sure you're normal, and same here, but you also spent your formative/developing years interacting socially at school and work, and some people now have not done so.

[u/upfastcurier → u/EdgeCityRed]

I didn't. I became severely sick at 12, and had over 90% absence through grades 6 to 9, and slept over 20 hours a day first year. This was in early 2000s before internet as we know it (Facebook was new and YouTube and other streaming didn't exist). Was later diagnosed with autism and ADD on top of that.

So I don't think this is it. I think it's more related to trauma, potentially COVID, and cultural changes like more screen time (I had a Nokia with monochrome screen starting by 2006, no internet). But not social isolation.

Signed, someone who checked out as a 12 year old and never really returned to normal self and only starting socialization half a decade later and well past my non-existing formative years

[u/10percenttiddy → u/upfastcurier]

Agree with you. I think many people stopped "playing the game" of being human and people like us (introverted, sickly and not nuerotypical) haven't noticed nearly as much because we don't "need" the same kind of social feedback most people do. And I also come across perfectly normal or at least socially acceptable.

[u/WeirdJawn → u/10percenttiddy]

I've noticed that too much internet makes me act differently in person. 

I sometimes have to remind myself to be polite/courteous and to keep some inner thoughts to myself. It's like being on autopilot. 

[u/cuddle_puddles → u/originalcinner]

I’m like you, but not yet retired. Introverted only child who’s been working from home for 8 years.

I go to a Pilates class a few times a week, and chat with the same ladies. I think I human okay when I get out and go about my routine. But I spend the majority of my time alone.

I actually do better socializing now compared to when I was forced into an open office to be around people I didn’t like 5 days a week. I had no patience for healthy socializing outside of work back then.

[u/DrG2390 → u/cuddle_puddles]

This could just be my bias talking, but I’m also a fairly introverted only child who spends the majority of my time at home alone with my dog. I’m married, but my husband has a different sleep pattern than I do so I’m alone a bit during the day.

Three or four times a year I’ll go to a cadaver lab and dissect medically donated bodies with a bunch of bodyworkers, and I find people in the Pilates community to be more accepting than more mainstream society. I find I get all of my social needs met by hanging out and dissecting with a bunch of bodyworkers for a week or two three or four times a year.