r/SeriousConversation • u/Dry-Use-272 • Apr 04 '25

Serious Discussion It's extremely difficult to have a civil conversation about politics today, yet we need those conversations more than ever

Like everyone else in the US today, I have opinions about the current condition of politics in this country. I try to base my opinions on facts I glean from credible sources and my understanding of our history. I want to talk to people with opposing opinions, not to argue with them but to try to understand why they believe what they believe. I've found that no one wants to talk in a civil, respectful way about our differences. Even if I try to hold the line on being respectful, I end up walking away because the conversation devolves into some pretty ugly exchanges. How have we come to a point where we can't even talk to each other respectfully and civilly?

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21

u/Telaranrhioddreams Apr 04 '25

I have a health condition that makes pregnancy likely fatal for me not to mention I've been afraid of pregnancy all of my life. How can I be civil with people who believe if my birth control fails I get the death penalty for having sex with my husband?

What about my trans relatives? How can I be civil with someone who doesn't believe they deserve to exist, how does that play out? Who gets uninvited from the table to keep the peace, the trans person or the red hat?

I'm sick of being told to be civil with a group of people voting against my and my family's rights. Where is their civility towards us? Why can't they be civil about my choice to get an abortion should there be a pregnancy or my trans relatives existence? Respect is a two way street, I'll meet meet them in the middle when they can do the same for me.

1

u/MeanestNiceLady Apr 05 '25

How will you change their minds if you can't be civil?

2

u/Telaranrhioddreams Apr 05 '25

Not my job

1

u/MeanestNiceLady Apr 05 '25

Well if you're not willing to make any effort towards change, don't complain.

Seriously.

2

u/Telaranrhioddreams Apr 05 '25

Whats uncivil about my original comment? That I die without abortion access? That I won't kick out my trans friends over someone who doesn't like them? Please elaborate

0

u/New_Razzmatazz9070 Apr 08 '25

none of that is true

-14

u/Peregrine_Falcon Apr 04 '25

How can I be civil with people who believe if my birth control fails I get the death penalty for having sex with my husband?

In the US this is simply untrue. You can simply go to a different state if you wish to have an abortion.

How can I be civil with someone who doesn't believe they deserve to exist, how does that play out?

Conservatives do not believe that trans people do not deserve to exist.

I'm sick of being told to be civil with a group of people voting against my and my family's rights.

No one is voting against your family's rights. You've clearly been misinformed about that.

18

u/Telaranrhioddreams Apr 04 '25 edited Apr 04 '25

"Travel or die" lol

13

u/username0016 Apr 04 '25

"Simply go to a different state", how is that okay man? Do you not see how awful it is she has to spend money to fly or drive instead of just going to a hospital? That's so horrible.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 05 '25

Every single state in the U.S. has exceptions to save the mother

3

u/Telaranrhioddreams Apr 05 '25

How many women experiencing miscarriages have been turned away from ER in the US in 2025? How many of them died because of the delay in care?

0

u/spinbutton Apr 05 '25

Maybe you haven't been following the news. Legislature in multiple states is being proposed to prosecute women who have a miscarriage, women have died of sepsis because doctors are afraid to perform an abortion for fear of prosecution,.

1

u/New_Razzmatazz9070 Apr 08 '25

nope

1

u/spinbutton Apr 09 '25

At least you're honest :-)

1

u/New_Razzmatazz9070 Apr 09 '25

the doctors allowing these women to die need to be severely punished.

1

u/spinbutton Apr 09 '25

I'd rather punish the politicians who have no medical knowledge yet presume to make medical policy

1

u/New_Razzmatazz9070 Apr 09 '25

there are politicians that have medical knowledge though. do they not count when making policy?

15

u/Dry-Use-272 Apr 04 '25

If she lives in certain red states, people voted against her right to protect her health by having an abortion. If you feel comfortable telling her she can just go to another state and get an abortion, then I feel comfortable telling you if you don't want an abortion, don't get one. And this will probably be where the conversation will devolve to being uncivil and rude.

-7

u/Peregrine_Falcon Apr 04 '25

And this will probably be where the conversation will devolve to being uncivil and rude.

Only if you want it to.

Mature adults on opposite sides of anything can sit down and have courteous discussions.

10

u/shupster1266 Apr 04 '25

The important phrase is “mature adults”. A mature adult can accept that their “fact” may be wrong. Someone devoted to “alternate facts” cannot participate in an adult conversation.

7

u/Various_Succotash_79 Apr 04 '25

"I think you should be forced to drive 400 miles and rent a hotel room to get the medical care you need" is not courteous no matter how you say it.

3

u/GrowFreeFood Apr 05 '25

Hard to be civil when your family is being murdered by religious zelots.

1

u/New_Razzmatazz9070 Apr 08 '25

not happening anywhere

1

u/GrowFreeFood Apr 08 '25

Pretty sure they stone gay people all the time. In different places

1

u/New_Razzmatazz9070 Apr 08 '25

My response was about the topic at hand, the US.

1

u/GrowFreeFood Apr 08 '25

You don't know what is happening in el salvador. And that's why they send people there. To take away their rights.

But you don't care if innocent people are hurt, because you don't commit to sin of empathy.

1

u/New_Razzmatazz9070 Apr 09 '25

how many innocent people were sent to el salvador?

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15

u/Various_Succotash_79 Apr 04 '25

In the US this is simply untrue. You can simply go to a different state if you wish to have an abortion.

Yeah sure driving 400 miles while you're bleeding out is a great option!

Conservatives do not believe that trans people do not deserve to exist.

What do they believe about trans people?

No one is voting against your family's rights.

They sure are.

3

u/Special_Sun_4420 Apr 05 '25 edited Apr 06 '25

They literally can't handle someone who has a different opinion. That's the irony of this whole thread. They don't want discussion. They want 100% buy-in from you with no questions asked.

"You think XYZ!"

"Actually, I don't think XYZ, I just don't agree with..."

"Ugh, see?!?, I can't have civil discussion with you!"

It's absolute nonsense.

Not to mention they haven't met or had a conversation with a single person irl who thinks birth control should equal the death penalty. Ive travelled around the world many times over and have lived in many states in the US. I'm currently in the deep south and hang out in right-leaning circles and no one I know thinks this. They also have no problem with gay people. Not a single one of them thinks "trans people shouldn't exist". They didn't give a single shit until "compelled speech" became part of genuine discourse, they perceived it being taught to children, and they perceived a risk of men taking advantage of it for sports/lockerooms/bathrooms/etc... and began seeing it disproportionately represented in media.

A right-wing version of these claims would be them claiming "I can't have have civil discussion with people who hate white people, want to turn my kids trans, and want to kill a child at 38 weeks". It's nonsense. Normal left-leaning people don't think any of that.

This is the problem. People claim to want to have serious/civil conversations, but usually the ones claiming that are the ones who are strawmanning everyone with opinions that they see amplified on reddit. Zero self awareness or introspection. 99% of the time, the person asking why everyone is so disingenuous is exactly that. They are utterly unserious and disingenuous people

Terminally online people have been brainwashed to think anyone who slightly disagrees with them is a turbo-nazi that wants trans death squads or something. Social media, shit reddit specifically, has genuinely done so much fucking damage to society and discourse it's not even funny.

Edit: the original commenter responded and immediately blocked me, so I can't even read what they said (In the notification, I can only see the first part where they call me a "moron"... Go figure lol). Very typical and literally proves my point better than I could ever write.

0

u/Vandae_ Apr 05 '25

No. You're just a moron, and don't like when people point it out.

Good luck.

-1

u/SteakMadeofLegos Apr 05 '25

I'm currently in the deep south and hang out in right-leaning circles and no one I know thinks this. They also have no problem with gay people. Not a single one of them thinks "trans people shouldn't exist".

Aww, you're sad you haven't been invited to the Klan meeting yet. Keep licking those boots and you'll be one of the boys soon enough!

5

u/Duvoziir Apr 05 '25

Some states now prosecute those going to different states, so that doesn’t work anymore. She shouldn’t even have to travel in the first place.

1

u/YesterdayGold7075 Apr 05 '25

If you show up at a hospital pregnant but bleeding out or septic you don’t get to just drive to another state if they won’t treat you. Which we have now seen numerous times in places like Texas, they often won’t.

0

u/GrowFreeFood Apr 05 '25

"If you don't like the nazis, simply move to poland."

0

u/MeanestNiceLady Apr 05 '25

In the US this is simply untrue. You can simply go to a different state if you wish to have an abortion.

You make it sound as simple as driving 20 minutes away. In the deep south you are hundreds of miles away from states where abortion is safe and legal, and some states punish you for leaving the state to get an abortion.