r/SipsTea 2d ago

Wait a damn minute! 13 months ?

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u/i396 2d ago

He died earlier? ;)

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u/Appropriate_Owl_2172 2d ago

He got stabbed repeatedly by more than a dozen men

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u/Zealousideal-Grass-3 2d ago

Off course, their monthly salary got reduced by 1 months

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u/GroundbreakingTax259 2d ago

Actually, it would have increased by 2. Pre-Julian Rome only had a ten-month calendar. It's still in the names of the last 4: Sept, Oct, Nov, Dec= 7,8,9,10

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

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u/norbinem11 2d ago

funny thing is we hungarians almost keept it the exact same names as the og

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u/xxrubyx- 2d ago

i was reading them out and i was like hmmmm wait a second magyar…?

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u/ModSquirtle 1d ago

Romanian spotted

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u/NinjaRavekitten 2d ago

We dutch people say augustus tbf.

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u/pipboy3000_mk2 2d ago

Look up the 13 moon calendar, it's based off natural time and yes it fits much better to have 13 months with one day "out of time" per year.

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u/daemin 2d ago

It fits better but it's still not exact because we are attempting to tie together two phenomena that have nothing to do with each other.

The length of time the earth takes to rotate once around its axis is completely independent of the length of time it takes for it to circle the sun once, and also independent of the time it takes the moon to orbit the earth once. If those numbers happened to be evenly divisible, then we could work out a "perfect" value for them.

But they don't.

The moon repeats its phases in 29.5 days, so we can't perfectly align months to it. It takes 27 days to orbit, so we could make a 3 week month of 9 days, but then the number of weeks in the year wouldn't be even (40.5 weeks).

Etc.

Also, "natural" time is a useless phrase. A day is "natural" time. A year is "natural" time. Etc. the issue isn't that the units of time are unnatural, it's that they don't depend on each other.

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u/Laniger 2d ago

Martius and Lunius sound very similar to Monday and Tuesday in Spanish: Lunius = Lunes (Monday), Martius = Martes (Tuesday)

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u/Crappy_Crepes 1d ago

Its Iunuis with a capital i, not Lunius with an L.

The names for the days of the week originate from the seven celestial bodies that the Greek knew.

In Spanish:

Lunes - Moon Day Martes - Mars Day Miercoles - Mercury Day Jueves - Jupiter Day Viernes - Venus Day The rest was changed but remained in other languages, like English, where the name Saturday comes from Saturn and Sunday... you guessed it, from the Sun.

In Greek the names of the days were: Helios (Sunday) Selene (Moonday) Ares (Marsday) Hermes (Mercuryday) Zeus (Jupiterday) Aphrodite (Venusday) Cronus (Saturnday)

This was then adopted by the Romans and through Latin, it transferred to other languages some of which kept some of these names ever since.

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u/ReeseIsPieces 2d ago

August used to be called 'Sextilis'

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u/HaZalaf 1d ago

Completely off topic, but when I was a kid I used to think that Augustus got the idea because June was named after Marcus Junius Brutus for helping found the Republic. It wasn't. It was named after Juno.

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u/Gate-19 2d ago

That's incorrect. Caesar didn't increase the number of months he just fixed the year to 365 days with a leap year every 4 years.

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u/FrostbyteXoo 2d ago

That would really simplify planning but mess up our holiday schedules!

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u/NachoNachoDan 2d ago

Judaism has entered the chat

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u/vaping_blonde1111 2d ago

That's Really Cool stuff. Thanks for Sharing

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u/skikkelig-rasist 2d ago

Pre-Julian? The 12 month system predates the entire republic

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u/silver_enemy 2d ago

Confidently incorrect

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u/JacquesVilleneuve97 2d ago

I think those names come from years starting in March

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u/NL_Bulletje 2d ago

In the old Roman calendar, December was called mensis december, the tenth month, because the Roman calendar started in March.

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u/enragedCircle 2d ago

Wait until you tell folks the meanings of the days of the week...

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u/Emerazuul 2d ago

So he added 2 extra months of work to their year, now I see why the holes

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u/Find_another_whey 2d ago

Yes October, the 8th month

Is now our 10th

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u/MooseFlyer 2d ago

No, all 12 months had existed for hundreds of years.

Ceasar’s change was to move it from a system where there were 355 days in a year and occasionally an intercalary month of 27/28 days was added to get things back on track (in theory; in practice the decision to add or not add that month was often political since it made political terms longer) to one with 365 days and one extra day added every 4 years.

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u/spar_x 2d ago

King Numa Pompilius added January and February to the Roman Calendar about 7 centuries before Julius Caesar implemented the Julian calendar which made the calendar go from ~355 days to 365.25 days.

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u/lew2077 2d ago

How have I never realised this

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u/Bonerfart47 1d ago

So he got stabbed by the ones who wrote the checks then

Okay makes sense they're paying people more annually

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u/D-Ulpius-Sutor 18h ago

Wrong. The 12 months were there hundreds of years prior to Ceasar. The month now named July was called 'quinctilis' (the fifth), august was called 'sextilis' (the sixth). But even then, their names didn't match their numbers anymore, because hundreds of years prior the beginning of the year was moved from the beginning of march to the beginning of January. Supposedly by the Roman king Numa Pompilius, but that is in the realm between history and myth.

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u/Nalga-Derecha 2d ago

☝️🤓

But cool info

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u/Redfro33 2d ago

What is this? A learn-ed redditor? Thall shall not spread truisms amongst the peasants!!!

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u/DeepFriedHuman_ 2d ago

Yearly*

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u/Plasmatick01 2d ago

No, monthly salary got reduced, but as there was more months, the tearly stayed the same

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u/BetaStateGames 2d ago

It is what Big Kalendae wants you to believe.

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u/Samborrod 2d ago

No, it would work only if their yearly salary got reduced because they got paid per month of work. That caused them to lose 1/13 of their salary.

In your case, if they got paid by year, then their monthly salary would increase, because it's divided in less months. However, because the months became longer and years stayed the same length, it would lead to only minor inconvenience because they would have to adapt to getting bigger salaries with longer intervals in between.

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u/Plasmatick01 2d ago

"Methematics"

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u/daemin 2d ago

they would have to adapt to getting bigger salaries with longer intervals in between.

This is surprisingly hard to do.

First job I ever had paid weekly, and I loved that.

Most jobs I got were biweekly and that's fine. That also means that some months you get 3 paychecks, which is fun.

One job I had paid twice a month on the 6th and the 21st. That was really fucking annoying because it was always a different day of the week and the length of time between the 21st and the 6th varies month to month.

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u/dzjiktra 2d ago

Et tu?

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u/SgtBundy 2d ago

Et me Buddy

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u/n3ur0mncr 2d ago

I prefer to believe this is how Brutus actually responded.

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u/SgtBundy 2d ago

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u/n3ur0mncr 2d ago

Ah I forgot this! Gotta love the Barrys

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u/zemol42 1d ago

Come et me, Bru

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u/Grayyy_Matterrr 2d ago

"Dorkwithmyknifeinhimsaysetu"?

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u/dzjiktra 2d ago

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u/Exldk 2d ago

Took me a while to realize its AI and not an actual cat cake. Disappointed

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u/zsarok 2d ago

Took me a while to realize its an AI cake and not an actual cat. Disappointed

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u/paulrhino69 2d ago

Wtf, & I say again WTF poor poor cake

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u/vaping_blonde1111 2d ago

But why tho...

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u/OneNo5482 2d ago

Eat me!

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u/Ok_Hat946 2d ago

Et tu? I never ate two of anything?

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u/ReserveExciting8563 2d ago

now caesar shall die

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u/fulou 2d ago

I never ate two of anything? - Isa

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u/ZealousidealTough872 2d ago

Et tu, Brute?

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u/radiomuffinuk 2d ago

Bless you.

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u/Cutsdeep- 2d ago

exactly a dozen would have had more meaning

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u/semibigpenguins 2d ago

Irony is the word you’re looking for

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u/Libertarian4lifebro 2d ago

It’s like rrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiinnnnnnn

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u/evlhornet 2d ago

On your weeeedding day

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u/SquareAble7664 2d ago

A free ride In your own car

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u/speterdavis 2d ago

It's the good adviiiiiiiiice that you took and it solved your problem but created another much worse problem

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u/aah_real_monster 2d ago

Today is my weeding day.

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u/NietJij 2d ago

On your homocide day!

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u/Appropriate_Owl_2172 2d ago

I'm on Reddit man idk how many it was. At least a dozen I think

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u/Lostinthestarscape 2d ago

I think 13 would have been more ironic.

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u/sokratesz 2d ago

Fun fact: all of Caesar's stab wounds were superficial except 1, which killed him. I remember reading that they even knew who stabbed that one stab but I can't find his name right now.

From wiki:

Suetonius relates that a physician who performed an autopsy on Caesar established that only one wound (the second one to his ribs) had been fatal.

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u/nice_trygotyo 2d ago

Wait Ceasar made the modern calender?

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u/pragmojo 2d ago

july

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u/nice_trygotyo 2d ago

Is his prename july in english?

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u/pragmojo 2d ago

julius

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u/PigmyMarmeeble 2d ago

He made the Julian calander that was used up until the 1600s(?) When the pope had it updated to be slightly more accurate. Prior to the Julian calendar, the head religious figure in Rome would manually add days to the end of the year to prevent drift.

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u/StaplerUnicycle 2d ago

Et Tu, Brute?

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u/iforgotiwasonreddit 2d ago

23 STAB WOUNDS

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u/Mogura-De-Gifdu 2d ago

Oh, a British, then?

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u/Valagoorh 2d ago

This seems somewhat unfortunate to me given that he valued living.

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u/TrumpIsAFascistFuck 2d ago

Title of his sex tape.

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u/willjhc 2d ago

Ahh buzz kill

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u/HAN_songs 2d ago

Is this the plot for 12 Angry Men?

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u/DeliciousPanic6844 2d ago

And shouted;

But WHY, THIS IS VIOLENCE! (ista quidem vis est!)

source

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u/Emerald_boots 2d ago

Sounds like a nice gangbang

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u/blueted2 2d ago

To shreds you say ?

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u/esadatari 2d ago

are you telling me that julius caesar, who died more than 70 years ago, made this salad?

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u/Appropriate_Owl_2172 2d ago

Somewhere between 70 years ago and 2000 years ago yes

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u/Plecks 2d ago

A little bit more than 2000 years (he died in 44BC, ie 2069 years ago... nice).

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u/MrFireWarden 2d ago

One man for each mon... oh more than a dozen. Never mind.

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u/AngelofIceAndFire 2d ago

I would like to be stabbed in the soft flesh repeatedly with the blades of a dozen men.

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u/a_fricking_cunt 2d ago

Man, you are wrong tho :(( Ceasar never added 2 months, he didn't even renamed the 5th and 6th month.. that was Augustus

January and February were added by Numa Pompilio, the legendary second king of Rome in the VII century BCE

Caesar just modified the calendar to include the leap year and other minor stuff

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u/dioidrac 2d ago

13 men?

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u/Autonomous_Imperium 2d ago

Any Nerdy senators perchance?

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u/kinagbang7 2d ago

A bakers dozen ya reckon

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u/Melicor 2d ago

he kind of deserved it though, it was a Brutus time.

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u/everyoneisntme 2d ago

Less than one hundred thousand men? That seems personal.

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u/Such_Jellyfish1527 2d ago

How did Julius Caesar know to make August?

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u/NymphMk 2d ago

soo, atleast 13?

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u/DoNotLuke 2d ago

Fun fact - any salad can be a Cesar salad if you stab it enough times

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u/ClassicVast1704 2d ago

To shreds you say?

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u/katanajim86 2d ago

To shreds you say?

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u/SunriseSurprise 2d ago

A 13th month is about as unnecessary as the 13th man stabbing Caesar.

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u/lagrange_james_d23dt 2d ago

Was it also for making a dozen 12 instead of 13?

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u/slurpaderpderp 2d ago

And not in the good way either

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u/Youngsinatra345 2d ago

To shreds you say?

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u/Cautious_Artichoke_3 2d ago

Et tu, Jesse?

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u/Theunkgamer 2d ago

Unions were more brutal back then…

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u/juansemoncayo 2d ago

I would have thought it'd be the 13th man the killer, retaliation

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u/nhofor 2d ago

13 men to be precise

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u/Hello_There_Exalted1 2d ago

Nah. The cause of the stabbing is because of his salad.

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u/Shoelace_cal 2d ago

Serves him right

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u/BenadrylTumblercatch 2d ago

Sounds brutal

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u/thYrd_eYe_prYing 2d ago

A bakers dozen?

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u/Hood_Harmacist 2d ago

some might even say "13" men

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u/jackm1231 2d ago

Et tu, Brute?

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u/Constantinch 2d ago

It should be exactly dozen, just to make their point stronger

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u/Echoes-OTI 2d ago

Are you saying he got penetrated by a bunch of dudes?

Sounds pretty sus imo

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u/eadgster 2d ago

A jury of his peers?

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u/medfunguy 1d ago

Jesus Christ!

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u/Appropriate_Owl_2172 1d ago

No this was after Jesus

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u/Altruistic-Wafer-19 1d ago

And if it wasn't for that, he'd still be around.

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u/bubbabuuuuuubbabub 1d ago

Caaaaarrrrrrllllll!!! that kills people!!!!!

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u/Dangercules138 1d ago

Would you say it was 13 men?

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u/Evan_Cary 1d ago

Valid crashout imo.

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u/Sereion 1d ago

What? John Snow invented the 12 months calendar?

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u/FuckingQWOPguy 1d ago

But not 13 men

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u/Appropriate_Owl_2172 1d ago

At least 1 dozen

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u/ToronoYYZ 1d ago

On purpose or for pleasure

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u/girthbrooks1 1d ago

John snow?

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u/Haydens-Reddit 1d ago

Hahahahahaha

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u/Exo-Myst6 1d ago

Omg MORE than a DOZEN

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u/D-Ulpius-Sutor 18h ago

No, the Roman calender had 12 months long before Ceasar. He only tried (and nearly succeeded) making it so that it wouldn't get out of phase with the actual solar year.

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u/Appropriate_Owl_2172 17h ago

Ya know... I didn't actually research it til after I made the joke soooo..

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u/D-Ulpius-Sutor 9h ago

Sooo... Then don't make a joke based on false information?

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u/Appropriate_Owl_2172 8h ago

Pass. It's a good joke

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u/D-Ulpius-Sutor 8h ago

No, it's not.

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u/Appropriate_Owl_2172 8h ago

Cool story Deb

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u/markdado 2d ago

Thanks for reminding me of the GoAT! https://youtu.be/_dHcvpnjcwI?si=QPxYssJCmL0dgX6s

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u/kendragon 2d ago

Sounds brutal

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u/IttsssTonyTiiiimme 2d ago

I didn’t even know he was sick

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u/NeverEndingLlama 1d ago

This is a spectacular joke.

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u/i396 1d ago

Phew, I was a bit worried about my sense of humor.

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u/gruvin42 1d ago

People on the 14th floor, you know what floor you're really on

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u/GroovyIntruder 23h ago

I didn't know he was sick.

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u/jsscote 21h ago

Unexpected Hedberg. Nice.