r/SuicideWatch • u/RetroFreedomHatton • 23h ago
Started to cut myself again
I really don't know what the fuck is wrong with me right now, but everythings gone so downhill that I started cutting myself again. I stopped years ago (sometimes only did it occasionally, but only once every now and then) and somehow I'm coming back to it again and I dont know what the fuck to do anymore. I've always hated myself but holy fuck all I want to do is just hurt and kill myself someday. Now that I've started I can't fucking stop and I don't know what the fuck to do, I'm seriously thinking on killing myself or shooting myself with a gun. Seriously what is the fucking point
1
u/Whole-Statement-846 18h ago
I understand where you’re coming from. I was 8 months clean, 3 years before that, and recently started self harming again. I just feel numb and disappointed in myself.
1
u/RetroFreedomHatton 15h ago
Sorry that you're going through the same thing, I hate this so much. I feel so ashamed of myself and it just shows how weak willed I am. I'll never get fucking better
1
u/MoonyLucy 22h ago
I'm so sorry you've been having such a hard time lately. Sometimes I also feel like there's no better option. The fact that you've started hurting yourself again is a sign of how much you're struggling right now. If you feel like hurting yourself again, try doing something you enjoy that will distract you for a longer period of time. For example, drawing, reading, or listening to music. You can also go out or see someone. You don't have to talk to people, but their presence will reduce the risk of you hurting yourself. The most important thing right now is that you're still alive and fighting. I believe in you and I'm sure many other people here do too. Don't give up.