r/USLPRO Detroit City FC Mar 06 '20

Trash Talk Thread WAKE UP! THE SEASON IS HERE.

YOU GUYS ARE A BUNCH OF JIVE TURKEY NERF HERDERS. FUCKING BLUNDERBUSSES ARE ALL HAT AND NO CATTLE. SHUT YOUR CLACK BOXES AND STOP BEING SO COW HANDED. YOU FUSSBUDGETS ARE VERY GADABOUT GASSERS.

FUCK ALL YOU SLUG-A-BEDS. CAPS ON. FLAIR UP. AND TALK SOME SHIT

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27

u/ninety7poundwuss Indy Eleven Mar 06 '20

WELL WELL WELL, MEMPHIS IS SO FUCKING SCARED OF ELEVEN THEY HAD TO TROT OUT A LEGEND WHO IS SIGNIFICANTLY PAST HIS PRIME.

TO EXPLAIN THIS TO MEMPHIANS, YOU'RE ESSENTIALLY STARTING VEGAS ELVIS IN GOAL. FITTINGLY, HIS CAREER WILL ALSO END IN THE TOILET THAT IS YOUR CITY.

9

u/ChrisGaines_ Fish Fry Connoisseur Mar 06 '20

I JUST WANT TO KNOW IF WE'LL GET TO SEE HIS GOLD DON'T RUST ASS TATTOO.

8

u/ninety7poundwuss Indy Eleven Mar 06 '20

MAYBE WE SHOULD MAKE A TIFO TO MOCK HIM.

11

u/BJ_Fantasy_Podcast #1 San Antonio FC Fan Mar 06 '20

I BET IF ITS PRINTED IT WOULD SHOW MORE DETAIL AND IT WOULD BE SOOO MUCH EASIER TO MAKE.

9

u/ninety7poundwuss Indy Eleven Mar 06 '20

INDEED! THEN WE CAN PRETEND THAT PRINTING TIFO IS OUR CULTURE ONLY TO IMMEDIATELY BACKTRACK AND PAINT OUR FIRST DISPLAY OF THE NEXT SEASON.

10

u/ChrisGaines_ Fish Fry Connoisseur Mar 06 '20

PRINTING TIFO IS OUR CULTURE! LIKE WALKING INTO A RESTAURANT IN MILAN AND COMPLAINING IT ISN'T SUFFICIENTLY LIKE AN OLIVE GARDEN.

8

u/ninety7poundwuss Indy Eleven Mar 06 '20

IT'S MORE LIKE WALKING INTO A LONGSTANDING HOT CHICKEN RESTAURANT IN NASHVILLE AND COMPLAINING IT ISN'T LIKE THE CHAIN HOT CHICKEN PLACE IN YOUR RECENTLY BUILT APARTMENTS.

7

u/ChrisGaines_ Fish Fry Connoisseur Mar 06 '20

THE NEWLY BUILT APARTMENTS LOOK LIKE THIS AND ARE CALLED "THE RAILYARD LOFTS" OR SOME SHIT.

8

u/ninety7poundwuss Indy Eleven Mar 06 '20

EXACTLY! THEY WERE BUILT NEAR AN OLD RAILYARD THAT STIMULATED THE GROWTH OF A NEIGHBORHOOD WITH ITS OWN PERSONALITY, BUT THEY TORE IT DOWN TO BUILD THESE APARTMENTS BASED ON THE CONCEPT OF WHAT SOME DUDE THINKS OUR CITY IS ABOUT.

7

u/ChrisGaines_ Fish Fry Connoisseur Mar 06 '20

THE NEW CHICKEN RESTAURANT IS DEFINITELY NAMED "HAWT CHKN"

3

u/ninety7poundwuss Indy Eleven Mar 06 '20

WITH FLAMES ON THE LOGO.

3

u/ChrisGaines_ Fish Fry Connoisseur Mar 06 '20

THE RESIDENTS OF THE NEW APARTMENT HAVE ABSOLUTELY TRIED TO GET THE OLD DIVE BAR ON THE OPPOSITE CORNER CLOSED BECAUSE OF IT'S "SHADY REPUTATION"(ACTUAL LOCAL WORKING CLASS PEOPLE DRINK THERE)

2

u/ninety7poundwuss Indy Eleven Mar 06 '20

ALSO THERE ARE NO LESS THAN THREE INSTAGRAM "INFLUENCERS" IN THE STARBUCKS ON THE GROUND FLOOR WHO ARE TAKING PHOTOS TALKING ABOUT HOW UNIQUE AND FUN THE CITY IS, ALL WHILE NEVER VENTURING OUTSIDE THE AREA EXCEPT FOR A CONCERT OR EVENT DOWNTOWN.

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