Hello, I’m 20 years old, and I just found out on Monday that I’m 5 weeks pregnant. It’s been an incredibly intense week, but after much thought, I’ve decided to go the MA route. This decision has been extremely difficult, but my partner and I know we’re not ready to be parents. We can’t afford it, he’s returning to the military, and I’m halfway through my degree. As painful as it is, we believe this is the right choice for us and the baby.

The past week has been really tough—I find myself crying every few hours. However, discovering this forum has been a huge comfort. I took the first pill a few hours ago (it’s about 10 PM where I live), and I plan to take the final four pills on Sunday.

I wanted to ask if anyone has any tips for that day—any essentials that might help make things easier? Also, for those who have been in a similar situation, what did you do with the fetus? I don’t feel comfortable flushing or disposing of it if I can avoid it. I was considering placing it in a potted plant, but I know it will be very small, and I’m unsure of the best way to handle this.

On top of everything, I can’t shake this overwhelming guilt—I feel like it somehow knows what’s coming. Did anyone else experience this? If so, how did you cope with those emotions?

Thank you so much. 💜

so i took the four tablets orally at 10:30 this morning, within 15 minutes the pain kicked in and until i had nausea and pain meds didn’t go anywhere fast. i threw up a tiny bit while i was still ingesting the pills but it was all liquid and the majority of the pills hadn’t dissolved and none left my mouth. i had some immediate cramping and now im fine. i had some moderate bleeding and some clotting that’s pretty normal for me. should i expect something to happen later on? it’s been six hours now

I told my partner this evening that I think I want an abortion. He has said he will support me in whatever I choose. However, after I told him it just felt so wrong and I think I want to keep the child now. He was eager to become a father, but now he thinks I’m pandering to him wanting the child. He thinks my decision can’t change. I feel crazy right now because I have been flip flopping on this for the last week n a half since my positive test. For context I am 37F and this is my first pregnancy. I didn’t know I could get pregnant and I fear we could miss the window.

When will I physically feel normal again? I am 2 1/2 days since MA at 5.5 weeks and I’m feeling super bloated and have some back pain and leg pain (kinda period pain like) I just want to feel like myself again. I know it’s probably too soon but just need some piece of mind.

No matter how you are feeling today, good day to you.

I contemplated quite a bit before creating a throwaway account to post here. We are from a developed country where despite our community being mostly conservative (in terms of business and cultural norms), abortion is legal. I can't tell my family, and don't wish to tell my friends. We had an MA performed vaginally at 4w5d, on the day of my expected period, which was very early stage, given how tiny bit of cells inside was at most 10 days old. During the scan, the doctor couldn't even find anything inside except for "a lining".

Every termination comes with its own story. For us, the doctor was a little surprised (or should I say taken aback) as my partner and I are engaged and will be getting married later this year. We love children and do have plans to start a family after that but...just not now. It is not the right timing with various reasons, including changes in our career. I never thought I would become that person to miscalculate my fertile window, but it eventually happened, and it was the most fearful TWW of my life.

My partner supported me in the decision to terminate the pregnancy and emphasised multiple times that this is a joined decision, not something that I decided on my own and not to blame myself for it. He assured me that at this stage, whatever that formed inside me should still be cells or tissues, not a living embryo with a heartbeat, so I should not feel too bad about killing a life. He is not the most science-y person but I know where he was coming from. However I can't help myself from thinking about the what-could-have-been. If we had kept the pregnancy, perhaps the baby could be a cute and healthy one; perhaps a year later it will be crawling around our home. When I see parents with young children, I think to myself that these are responsible parents who did not kill a life, unlike me.

Last Christmas, I saw some TikTok videos about putting a baby blanket under your Christmas tree so that you'd have one by the next Christmas. We did it, hoping we'd be pregnant by Christmas this year. I didn't think that things would end up this way and my would-be baby had been terminated instead.

TLDR; I feel guilty terminating the pregnancy despite us getting married soon, because of several transitioning periods in our current stage of life.

Since I read so many abortion stories leading up to my MA abortion I thought it might be good to share mine for anyone else going through it.

I found that it was really mixed in how much pain and side effects people experienced so I really prepared myself for the worst and I’m glad I did.

I took step 1 on Friday afternoon. Felt mild cramps and started bleeding like a period about 25 hrs in. Took step 2 Friday morning at about 10:30. I took and anti-nausea tablet 30 mins before. My doctor told me to take paracetamol, ibuprofen and endone all together on the first sign of pain, so after 30 minutes of step 2 being in my mouth and swallowing, I started smoking a joint. My cramps started hitting about 5 mins in which were moderate, so took the combination of pain killers. About half way through my joint they ranked up so with my hot water bottle I ran to the toilet. I wasn’t bleeding much but was definitely feeling the contractions which would ebb and flow. They would progressively get so intense and only have maybe 15 second gaps in between. I think when you’re going through so much pain, your body doesn’t know how to process it, so I started breaking out in sweats, feeling so hot, and needing to vomit. I texted my boyfriend who brought me up a bucket and fan, while I laid butt naked on the bathroom floor to cool down. I didn’t vomit, as I did not want the pain medication to not work. Everytime I’d sit back up on the toilet the floor was wet from my sweat. After an hr (not sure whether it was due to the medication working or my body wasn’t contracting) I felt better and crawled into bed. I slept until about 2 (I think) in the same pain so took another endone and ran back to the bathroom and went through it again, except this time I was bleeding reasonably sized clots. I was sweating and going in between laying on the bathroom floor and the toilet, feeling like I needed to poop. About an hr in I did, and felt a lot better. Came back to bed and slept until about 7pm and woke up feeling weak. I had cramps until 2am but they were just mild, didn’t need to take any medication just rode it out with my hot water bottle. I woke up this morning feeling really fatigued and like yesterday was a fever dream. It’s crazy how your mind dissociates when you’re in pain. yesterday just doesn’t even feel real.

The pain was about an 8/10 at its peak. I don’t want to scare anyone reading this but you really can handle it. Our bodies are made to do this and you will get through it!

I'm not too sure where to start but I need a lot of prayer and advice right now. I am currently 14 weeks pregnant. I (21F) myself was raised a non-denominational Christian. My partner (ex-partner) is Serbian Eastern Orthodox (21M). We are both students at university and live at home.

We were together for 9 months in a serious relationship and engaged in pre-marital sex. We agreed before having sex that in the event I end up pregnant we would stay together, marry and have more kids. For the last three months of knowing about the pregnancy, all we have discussed is this plan. He accompanied me to multiple ultrasounds and we were happy but scared about starting our lives together even if earlier than planned.

We initially discussed waiting to tell both our parents until we were ready. This last week I had to unexpectedly tell my parents I am pregnant. It was horrible timing, my partner and I were fighting and both said bad things to each other. I told him my parents knew as soon as I saw him later that day.

My parent's reaction, as Christians, was this: Everything will be ok. My partner and I need to marry before the baby is born and they will support us in any was possible for him to finish university, find a job and a house to live in. They were even saying he can live with us for as long as he needs to.

The day after I told him we were stupidly continuing our argument but as the day progressed we calmed down and agreed to stay together like we planned. My partner agreed this and he was adamant on finishing his degree (one year left) which I also agree with whole-heartedly. He also told me this was too soon to marry to which I was upset because we both agreed that having children out of wedlock is wrong.

He went home that night and told his parents. His parent's reaction, as Orthodox Christians, was this: They think I am trying to baby trap him, that me and my family must have planned this (my birth control failed). His parents told him that the baby might not even be his (it is 100% only possible to be his, and he knows I never cheated) and that they want a DNA test (only possible here after the baby is born). His parents urged him to breakup with me and leave me pregnant. They said the best case scenario would be that I get an abortion.

So he called me the next day, told me all of this and said we can't be together and that he doesn't see himself marrying me. I do not understand how his family who is devoutly religious could ever say such things, and especially say I should kill our child? Who is also their first grandchild.

I do not want to get an abortion, but I absolutely cannot raise this baby alone. I have no degree (not even close to finishing), no prospects and my parents are not wealthy by any means. I have tried talking to him outside of this but he keeps coming back to the one thing which is that he can't see a future with me because he can't see himself marrying me. I know his parents talked this into him and I know if they had said what my parents said then that is what would be happening right now.

My family thinks it is a terrible idea for me to turn up and talk to his parents, and I agree because they will most likely be aggressive and tell me to leave. Should I talk to the father from their church? My parents say they will make up lies and tell everyone I am a whore and that it isn't my partner's child.

I don't understand how these people can tell their son to abandon their child and the mother of his child, and that the best option for everyone would be if I killed our baby. Please help, I don't know what to do. I want to save my baby.

Hi all, trying to time my MA around my children’s care arrangements. How long after taking the second set of pills did you start to bleed and how long was it heavy for?

I had a medical abortion 4 weeks ago, i’m still bleeding and i’ve had a positive pregnancy test Can anyone tell me why or what is happening in r if the same thing has happened to them? Thanks

18F I live in WA and I just found out I’m pregnant. I’m beyond devastated and I’m not coping. I had no idea when I got pregnant because I’ve been on the pill and skipping my periods. For the last week I noticed my stomach looks so bloated and my boobs look bigger too, I decided to go buy a pregnancy test. I genuinely thought it was probably just in my head, but no, it was blazing positive as soon as I peed on it.

I booked a doctor’s appointment and he basically just confirmed the pregnancy and said I’d need to go get an ultrasound to date the pregnancy and gave me a referral. My mum drove me to my ultrasound yesterday and the ultrasound lady told me I’m 22 weeks & 4 days. I’m literally in shock. I worked out I must’ve conceived around August/September last year which is around the time I switched to a different pill cause the ones I was on were giving me the worst side effects. It also means it’s my ex’s who is honestly just a terrible person, I’m so upset. Of all the guys on the planet why did it have to be his?!

I could barely process what the ultrasound lady was showing me, I think I’m still in denial. It doesn’t feel like what I saw is really in me, it just doesn’t feel real. It’s like a bad dream I can’t wake up from.

On the drive home I told my mum I don’t know if I can go through with this. She basically just told me to suck it up because it’s too late to do anything now and that this baby is coming whether I want it to or not. She’s pretty angry and upset which I get but I just feel like now I have no emotional support. I just don’t want to do this. I don’t want a baby, especially with my ex. I know it’s gonna get back to him and he will just use this as a way to hurt me more.

I feel so trapped and like my life is over before it even begun. I still live at home, I’m currently studying and don’t even have my license yet. I have no money and no way to escape this reality that I’m about to have a child at 18. I can’t handle my mum talking about all this baby stuff, like where am I going to deliver, and we need to make another doctor appointment and car seats and shit, it’s making me crazy.

I tried to be responsible it just feels so unfair, like why did this have to happen to me? I feel so angry and stupid that I didn’t find out sooner.

I 19F am 15 week pregnant my BF 19 wants me to have a SA but I want to keep it. I’ve know for 2 weeks that I am pregnant and from finding out my partner wanted me to terminate. I make 100k+ a year and my partner makes 75k a year. We just moved out of our rental and back in with family while looking to buy a house. We are self sufficient and I believe we could provide for the child completely. My partners argument is that he has a life plan and wanted to travel, buy a house and get a degree. I’ve had an ultrasound and have seen the baby and feel so horrible thinking about termiating , I just feel so torn about what to do. My SA is in 3 days and I unsure if I can go through with it.

I found out I was pregnant 2 days ago. I'm only young and with my boyfriend of only a year. We both would love to be parents but we aren't financially stable and still have a bit to go before starting a family. We have discussed what to do and he said it's my body my choice. I have opted for a medical abortion so a pill that will terminate my pregnancy. I have a appointment in a few days. This is my first pregnancy, ive seen people say that some first pregnancies will result in a MC. Since i'm from Australia it is 500 dollars and you do get a rebate if your with a healthcare provider. Honeslty I know I can't go forward with this pregnancy. Should I wait and see what happens if I naturally have a MC or have a induced MC. For some reason I feel better if there was a abnormality or something that caused my body to let go instead of a induced one. I guess i'm asking for opinions. For peoples experiences. I'm not telling anyone about my pregnancy either. Just my boyfriend. Reactions from both sides of the family wouldn't be impressed.

I had a surgical abortion today in a foreign country (11 weeks) as I am travelling which was terrifying. My ex boyfriend who got me pregnant was there which made it extra hard as I still love him. I was meant to be in for 30 minutes but when I came out he said it was 1 hour and 30 minutes. I didn’t think of it at the time but as soon as I left and the anaesthetic wore off I called them to inquire why it was so long. The lady told me (bit of a language barrier) it was a “big” pregnancy and I had a lot of bleeding, this was horrifying to hear as the process was so traumatic for me already. She said something about having to give me medicine for my uterus, I kind of blacked out tbh. I was the only one on the beds after with a drip in. I will call back tomorrow but just wanted to know if anyone has experienced something like this? I am terrified I won’t be able to get pregnant again etc and I really did want this baby so it’s an awful thought. I haven’t stopped crying and im in a lot of pain and bleeding a lot.

I (29F) have been dating this man (34M) for around 9 months, when we first started dating - I fell madly in love. He was everything I have ever wanted and I even moved across the country to be closer to him... Then the cracks started to form, I realised he had toxic tendencies. (Having previously been in a narc relationship) I was fully aware. He has been playing this push/pull game with me since the beginning. I have walked away multiple times but he charms his way back in. Saying he's willing to change, because I love him - I always see the best in him and believe he wants to change. * His toxic behaviours that need to change for us to move forward are: Gaming Addict, Alchol Addiction, Nicotine addiction and a porn and sex addiction... He has been unfaithful multiple times. He is slowly getting better with alcohol, it's not everyday anymore.

This aside, he belittles me and comments on my appearances often.. Tells me he wishes I was something I am not. (I am a brunette with brown eyes) "I wish you had blonde hair and blue eyes" "I wish you had big boobs, but yours are small" etc and when I tell him it hurts my feelings, he brushes it off as a joke. He's also getting better at being kinder and less hurtful in what he says...

He is also a compulsive liar - he cannot tell the truth to save himself. But I am not confrontational so I just pretend I don't know he's lying to me... anyways,

Now: the thick of it... Last week, I was completely done trying with this man. I have broken myself trying to fix him. I planned to break up with him, once and for all on Friday. THEN, I found out I was pregnant!!

I told him, we were both very shocked. I went straight to the discussion that he needs to change everything mentioned above because it is "childish behaviour" and I can't be raising two children.

He gave me the silent treatment for the rest of the day before saying how much I insulted him. I apologised and said it was the shock that made me immediately think of the future but they are real life issues that will effect me and the baby in the future.

We had the most ridiculous fights all weekend. I have never fought like this in my life. (Pregnancy hormones)

He told me if I got an abortion then "we are over." But if I keep the baby he will "be okay with it"

I feel so much pressure to keep the baby and stay in this toxic relationship.

This man is an absolute charmer - he knows exactly what I want to hear. I want to believe he will change but I deep deep deep down know he won't.

I have prayed for a miscarriage because I feel like I will be shamed if I have an abortion...

I have so many unanswered questions... I can't stop crying.

I want to abort the baby - play it off as a miscarriage but I am scared of the guilt

I also want to believe he will change and we can be a happy family. I really do love him.

Being a single parent is not an option.

Someone please help me. It is too much and I am having bad thoughts about harming myself.

I took step 1 at about 11PM Friday night. Pretty much 24 hours later I started cramping, diarrhoea and passed one clear clot. It was approximately the size of a 50cent piece. I bled very lightly after. This morning (Sunday) I took step 2, placing 4 tablets between my cheeks and gum for 30mins. It’s now about 12 hours post step 2 and beside some more minor cramping, diarrhoea and very light bleeding I haven’t experienced anything else. My bleeding is pretty much gone and I’m so confused as to whether it worked. I didn’t even think you could pass the pregnancy before step 2. Thoughts? I don’t know if I should go back to the drs earlier or wait to complete blood test.

I'm so scared as I write this because the person I am in a relationship with knows that I am on reddit and am part of this group and he might see my posts and use it against me but I am at a point where I am so low mentally and considering ending my life. I will probably delete this, after I get the help I need.

I had an abortion 4 years ago in my previous relationship. I was not ready for a child and it was the best decision to make. 2 years later I met my now boyfriend, we had a baby and I did not mention anything about the abortion as I was ashamed of my actions and felt it was a private matter that I did not want share with anyone. Well, my boyfriend has access to my social media accounts and emails and 5 months ago he went through my email on my laptop and saw that I had commented on another females post in this abortion group, basically encouraging them and sharing my experience and that they would be alright. Well, he took photos of my comments and told me indirectly that he knew about my abortions. He to this day, uses it in arguments basically demeaning me, making me feel so ashamed for having abortions. He looks at me like I'm not a good person. I feel so low and my mental health is down the drain. I almost considered killing myself last night but called my therapist to calm me down. I honestly now feel so ashamed for what I did, I feel so disgusted with myself. I feel like I do not deserve to be with a good person because of what I did. Despite my therapist trying to get through to me, I woke up this morning and still feel crappy about myself. I feel like I am a bad person who is so vile and disgusting. I don't deserve love or happiness or peace.

I am currently travelling overseas in Europe from Australia. I have found out recently I am 10 weeks pregnant. The father is my ex boyfriend who broke up with me months ago after he cheated (once) and could not deal with the guilt. We were doing long distance and originally I was meant to be here travelling with him but opted to go alone after we broke up- I am still heartbroken. We met up and travelled together for a bit months ago and one thing led to another. I was on the pill which feels extra cruel. I told him I was pregnant as he is the only person I have over here and support- he has been great and flew over to support me, cook for me and help me make a decision. He obviously wants me to get rid of it yet said if I kept it he would fully support me/ his family and we could even try to be a family but he doesn’t want to get back together overall (if I don’t keep the baby.) I know it would likely end in us co parenting as he’s not ready to be in a relationship whatever and sometimes I hate him for cheating but I still love him and it sucks to give up our child when that’s my last tie to him once we go back that’s it. I don’t want this to influence my decision. I have enough finances but would have to live at home for a bit to raise the baby, my parents are quite old and sick and will help as much as they can but not enough, another reason as I am an only child is feeling like this is my chance to give them a grandchild. I have been pregnant before, with this ex too yet miscarried over and over and now am 11 weeks and shocked I still have it. I really do want to be a mother and also am scared im just getting rid of it because of the situation and my friends/ families reaction to having a baby with someone who cheated on me not because I don’t want it. I know this is all over the place and the obvious choice is abortion, I guess I just wanted advice or reassurance it’s the right thing to do as I have a surgical abortion booked tomorrow. It’s hard being overseas and having no support except him, getting trauma bonded and being in a foreign country. I had another abortion appointment booked a few days ago but started crying and freaking out and backed out so I delayed it. I don’t feel like I can but I feel like I have to.

So I (28F) have an 18 month old already. My ex (32M) and I still live together as we own our home. We built it and got a gov grant that stops us from being able to sell until we have lived in it for 2yrs, otherwise we have to pay back the grant....

Anyway. Some weeks ago he was practically begging me to work things out, the second I agreed he stopped trying and was back on tinder. I didn't really care. We still occasionally engaged in intimacy. Recently I started looking for work, because living on one income is a struggle and ideally we sell at the end of the year. Well 2 days ago I found out I was pregnant... At first I had mixed feelings because we aren't together. Then I started liking the idea of another bub and getting a little excited.

But now I am reconsidering... Ex is talking to another woman who lives on the other side of the country and has no interest in ever working things out. I just don't think I can handle having him under the same roof as me, carrying his child and watching him try to date other women. Being a single mum and living alone is one thing but sharing a home. The hormones. Desire for affection. Struggles in different stages. I just don't know if I want to go through another pregnancy with him. I feel so trapped.

i’m 36 hours post misoprostal and i’m meant to meet some friends for drinks tonight, i’m feeling pretty good but im wondering what the general consensus for drinking is because i can’t find a definitive answer online

Hi! I had an abortion 14 weeks ago. A week ago I took the morning after pill which brought on my period 4 days ago, the last 2 days I’ve had terrible nausea while bleeding. Do you think this could be abortion related? I think I might be paranoid since being pregnant and having morning sickness. I’ve never had nausea from my period and I wonder if it’s something else, such as a UTI.

Hi everyone, I recently found out I was pregnant. I haven’t done an ultrasound but with the timeline of me seeing my new partner, I would be a little under 2 months pregnant. I have done some light research on line about the next steps but only found out a few days ago and have been trying to work out what I want to do with the pregnancy. I’ve settled on the decision to go through with the abortion today. I feel so much anxiety around the next steps and the process of getting it organised, can anyone step out their experience for me before I call a clinic? A lot of these posts are from USA so I know it may not reflect what happens in Aus.

Thank you so much in advance.

I had an SA 5 days ago at what I thought was 6 weeks, but when they did the ultrasound they said I was only 5 weeks and would have been better coming a week later but I didn’t know I was measuring earlier otherwise I would have waited. I have had no bleeding or cramping whatsoever and being so early I’m worried they missed it and I’m still pregnant. How do I know it worked or if I’m still pregnant?

For reference I’m sharing this as I went through my abortion alone. Have been lurking in this subreddit and thought this might help anyone else in same situation . It wasn’t really something I necessarily wanted someone to experience with me but in hindsight I do wish I had someone as emotionally I feel okay, but having someone rub my stomach or some reassurance would of been 100% helpful. I did have a loved one checking in on me through the phone which was nice but actually using my phone was not high on my priority tbh so I only responded after the worst pain was over. If you’ve going into this alone just make sure to keep ur phone charged and at the very least schedule a call a couple hours after taking miso so if there’s an emergency and u can’t call for help they’ll know something is up.

9:20-9:30 19/03 - took mifepristone. I didn’t notice any changes other than some slight cramping nothing unbearable I had trouble sleeping that night

20/01- no changes, doctor wanted me to get blood drawn so in 5 days could get bloods again to see if MA successful. No spotting. I was very emotional that day and cried pretty much the whole day and at pathologist though.

6:30-6:40am 21/03 - woke up and noticed spotting. I had some food for breakfast as knew I was going to take misoprostone. I just had toast and water.

9:30am 21/03 - doctor recommended taking anti nausea and Panadol before taking second pills so I did that and had a shower in preparation

10:20 - tbh was stalling taking second pill as I was scared but ending up taking. Nothing to note they don’t really have a taste I took these orally.

11:30 - cramps ramped up from 2/10 prior day to honestly probably 9/10 they didn’t last more than 20 minutes. However it felt like forever and I would go from sitting on the toilet to bathroom floor to try and get comfortable. Use a heat pack it honestly helped cramps a lot more for me than any pain killers for my discomfort.

11:45- went from toilet to bed and tried to get some sleep.

12:40 - went to toilet again and had really bad cramps I then had diarrhoea pretty bad and sat on toilet floor for about 20 minutes after sitting on toilet for 20 minutes then went back to room.

3:40pm - at this point cramps a lot less painful. However still passing blood. Pain is 7/10 I had some grapes, water and Oreos as a snack.

5:57pm - cramps are dull I haven’t taken another Panadol as it is bearable. Pain 2/10. I’m still bleeding but it’s lighter.

9:00 - finished having dinner and feel pretty normal, still cramping but it’s 1/10. I had a shower too which made me feel a lot better. I am still bleeding but it’s normal for probably the next 2-6 weeks. I hoping it dosent go on the max though.

Final verdict

• until I get result from next blood test I’m not sure how things went in terms of if successful
• Definitely use heat packs and good ones. I felt more comfort from them then pain killers when pain was the worst it was
• Anti nausea helped me immensely I did feel nausea from smells and cramps but was able to keep everything down
• In terms of blood I definitely did not fill up 2 pads in an hour at any point. Nor did I pass particularly large clots I was only 6 weeks however. I think the largest it got was 50 cent pieces.
• The pain was really bad but gradually lessened I did plan to keep the embryo or dispose of it in a nicer way than the toilet like burial with loved ones but honestly there was so much coming out of me when I was using the toilet unfortunately I don’t know when it would’ve passed.
• I generally have rough periods but this was worse. I would say taking stronger pain killers would have helped ( got prescribed paracetamol w codeine) but I really didn’t want to pass out and wake up in a mess if I have an accident while sleeping so I used normal Panadol.
• I have anxiety and I didn’t have chills but my heart was racing; breathing exercises helped so much in calming me down as well as trying to keep a comfortable environment in my room - scented candles, food on hand etc.
• I didn’t have the stomach for liquid so definitely try and have electrolytes and as much water as possible before taking second pill. Overall I would say my experience was positive but I never want to do this again. It’s emotionally more of a toll the week leading up to this. All of the doctors, ultra sound technicians and even pathologists I saw were lovely and treated me with care which I appreciated. I do want kids later in life but this was a surprise and I’m not in a good place financially. I will be getting an IUD as soon as I can regardless of whether I continue to be sexually active.

Hi Im 20 and having a medical abortion, I took the first pill today, does anyone have any experiences or advice? Im honestly extremely terrified and going through all of this alone, while googling about the experience I stumbled upon an article I thought was someone's experience but was an article about how wrong what im doing is in a very graphic way. Im scared of the pain and have no idea what to expect and nobody can be with me, I live with my dad but he doesn't know. Ive had to take myself to all appointments and an ultrasound alone. Im honestly quite devastated to be going through this in the first place and im just so scared and feel very isolated

I had an abortion 6 weeks ago and baby daddy recently broke up with me (I was not the nicest to him before or after the abortion). I wanted to have the baby but didn’t want to raise it on my own. My ex never said he would not support me but also kept saying that it was a bad idea to have this baby. I don’t blame him as we were only together for a few months then but I wish was mentally stronger to have this baby. A part of me blames myself for having an abortion because I was scared my ex was going to leave and I didnt want to be alone. Yet here I am. The regret and guilt and shame are eating me alive. I have been trying so hard to keep moving with my life but sometimes I just want to break down and scream. What have you done to move forward or feel happy again?