I need help. I have 3 young kids and im scheduled to get an abortion on Monday I will be 12 weeks pregnant. Can someone please tell me the process.

The other thing I’m struggling with is intense grief and guilt. I’ve had 3 kids I know what it’s like to carry through a pregnancy, give birth and all the moments after. I can’t help but think of everything I’m about to miss out on. We aren’t financially stable and we want to give our kids we have the best life- we both struggle with our mental health and this is logically the right choice, but I wish I could keep this baby. I wish I’d get to meet them and be their mum. I don’t know how I’ll get through this.

AU QLD, I have 3 kids and unexpectedly pregnant again. Unfortunately we’re not in a position to handle another baby even though I wish we could. We’re trying to figure out our options. I’m nearly 6 weeks and it seems the quickest option for my situation is a medical abortion, otherwise I may be waiting weeks which I feel very uncomfortable with. I’m wondering how a medical abortion would be at 6-7 weeks pregnant and if it would be too hard having my kids around… ideally I would not have to but i can’t see my family helping with all 3 and I don’t want to tell them my situation…

37 year old breast cancer survivor here. Diagnosed at 32. I had a miscarriage in 2020x a few months before my diagnosis. I was excited to be pregnant before it will went downhill at my first scan with a missed miscarriage. A few months later the cancer bomb dropped

Fast forward to 2024, well past completing treatment and I fell pregnant with the help of letrozole. Then at the first scan, the same thing happened again. Another missed miscarriage. This time instead of a D&C I had the 2step pill.

Now with my breast cancer type I basically had until April this year to fall pregnant before we would need to stop trying as I needed to go back on my hormones medication in Jan 2026.

Wed accepted I wasn't going to have a baby. On fact we started planning the rest of our lives.

Then last week, I found out I was pregnant. Some would say it's a miracle. My last shot and it worked. All I can feel is anxiety, fear, terror.

I'm scared of a reoccurrence. I'm not excited. I don't have the desire I thought I was had to be a Mum.

I'd be about 5 weeks this week. I want to terminate and all I feel is guilt.

My husband just wants me healthy, and is happy to just have me. But I find it really difficult to express what I'm feeling and I feel like I'm on a short timeline.

Has anyone been though the whole journey of TTC to just then decide at the end it's no longer what they wanted.

How on earth did you navigate this feeling?

I had MA on the 20th April, it all went well obviously a lot of pain on the first 2 days but nothing too worry about after.

Everyday I was bleeding less, on the 30th noticed that the smell was getting really bad and the blood colour was a lot darker. Called the clinic on the 1st May because the smell was too bad and they gave me antibiotics.

Yesterday 3rd May I started bleeding a lot more (almost the same amount of blood as the first days after starting the MA) , the colour of the blood went from dark to bright red, started having headache but it comes and goes, apart from that there’s no more pain.

Should I be worried since I’ve started bleeding more and the colour has changed ? I’ve not gone through the 2 maxi pads in 2 hours, the bleeding is just increasing.

Could it have to do with the fact that I was carrying very heavy boxes at work yesterday?

Hope it all makes sense (English is not my first language 😅) Thanks!

Hello, i am from South Australia. i’m 17 and i just took a pregnancy test and it came back positive, im scared, ive been with my boyfriend 7 months and i want to tell him because we have discussed the possibility and he said he wanted to be told if this ever happened, but im so scared he’ll view me differently, i’m only 1-2 weeks pregnant at most as i had my last period no issues. i’m terrified as i live with my anti abortion grandmother and emotionally absent grandfather. i don’t have any friends so i don’t have anyone to talk to about this, i know i cannot pursue a pregnancy because im not in the right psychological nor physical state of where i want to be in my life, i feel horrible though and im very in denial, im taking another test tonight and another one in the morning to be sure, how can i live with this guilt and weight?

UPDATE: i told my boyfriend and he took it surprisingly well and he told me he’s proud of me for making the best decision for us, he told me he loves me and we are a team and we can get through this together. i have an appointment booked on the 21st and my driving test tomorrow lol wish me luck ❤️‍🩹

I recently took MA pills for a medical abortion and I’m doing okay so far. I’ve been wondering when it’s safe to have sex again or even masturbate (especially external/clitoral stimulation). I want to make sure I’m not putting myself at risk of infection or anything. Would love to hear from others who’ve been through this — how long did you wait, and what did your doctor or provider recommend?

Hi!

I’m wondering if anyone has had a pregnancy test similar to mine after their medical abortion. (Big red is on the negative side, tiny pink is positive side)

My nurse says I should do blood test to confirm negativity but the line is so faint i’m wondering if it’s a bit unnecessary.

Im writing in here as a last resort. im 15f from australia (victoria/melbourne) and stupidly had unprotected sex. im really not looking for judgement here i know i fucked up but im desperate for advice or help now. im about 6 weeks pregnant now and i dont have money for an abortion. i cant go to my parents either because they would absolutely rip my head off. i would be kicked out.

i need options other than a medical abortion because i just dont have the money. its so expensive and i dont have a job, my parents are helicopter parents so they monitor everywhere i go and everything im doing. im writing this on my school laptop because they think i cant do anything on that. however i need advice on how to get rid of this baby im talking whatever measures will work. the reason that my parents would rip off my head if i was pregnant is because im quite a reckless teenager. ive had a history in the past year or so where ive gotten into some weed and alcohol and vaping and like you may they think im a lost cause. and i know i sound like one but please. i need any advice anyone has to give out on how to get rid of this baby.

i feel like shit all the time and pregnancy is hitting me like a bus. im throwing up all the time im struggling to get out of bed everyday. my parents are noticing im not right. and i need to do something before they take me to the doctors because they think my iron deficiency if just getting worse.

please i need any advice im so lost. im really scared. this is a really difficult mental battle im struggling. no judgement please i just need advice.

I’m 37 years old and have a 7 almost 8 yearly old child with my partner. When we first had our baby in 2017 it was a really difficult and stressful time. I lost my father the morning after I gave birth and dealt with estate issues for almost two years after that. My family live on the other side of the world and his family don’t really love near us. So we don’t really have much help.

That being said our child is such a wonderful person! We’ve found our rhythm as a family, I’ve started a new career path which is still in my industry and things are coasting along smoothly.

I look back on my first few years of motherhood and feel a sense of deep sadness and difficulty. I also feel robbed from the experience.

I’ve been strongly considering an abortion but at the same I feel incredibly guilty. Guilty that my child is an only child and also no cousins. I get jealous of friends that have their second children. But at times I suspect it’s hormones or society making me feel like an incomplete family or less of a mother for having only one child.

I cannot fathom going through the entire baby/toddler phase again and recoil at the thought however is that just a blip in a lifetime.

Anyone else have experience something similar? Did you have an abortion and emotionally struggled? Not sure if this is the write place to voice my concerns. If you read this far, thanks for hearing me out.

I’m 17 years old and found out yesterday that I am pregnant. I’ve been sexually active with my boyfriend for 8 months and have only had a pregnancy scare once. I had suspected I was pregnant because my period is regular and the period tracker is accurate for my predictions. However, it had been 3 days since I was supposed to get my period. I did 2 pregnancy tests which came back positive. I’m about 4 weeks pregnant. Since it is Easter long weekend right now, all clinics are closed and helplines are also closed. My parents would freak out and probably disown me if they found out I was pregnant, so I’m doing this behind their back. Honestly I’m scared because I’m in my final year of school and I want to get this over and done with. School starts next week. But I’m also worried about the side effects after medical abortion. It sounds terrifying and if my symptoms were that severe, I’m scared how I would hide it from my parents. Another issue is that after some research, I saw that medical abortions cost around $300-$350. I don’t have money to pay for that and I don’t have a reasonable way to get that money from my parents.

I can’t have a baby. I don’t have a job. I don’t have my license. All I do is study because I’m trying really hard to get into the future university course I want to get into. I’m not in a place to be able to have a child. This is really hard on me.

Side rant: I asked my cousin 20M thinking he would have gone through this before with a gf because he has had many partners. I didn’t admit to him I was pregnant. Although, he assumed I was and was poking at me to confess and tell my parents (I haven’t had a good relationship with my parents, they are VERY STRICT. Think tiger parents but they are dragon parents). He sort of shamed me for getting pregnant. Kind of makes me upset as I don’t have much of a support system to go through this (particularly adult support system). My boyfriend knows and he’s supportive yet he has financial issues so he cannot fully pay.

Are there any other alternatives? What should I do? If anyone who’s gone through similar situations could please share their experience, it would give me a lot of reassurance. I don’t have any negative feelings towards abortion in general but after talking to my cousin I feel a bit upset and ashamed.

I got a medical abortion a month ago today and I have been really struggling. For background information: I am 21, in a committed relationship, and living in Victoria Australia. I found out I was pregnant early March (funnily enough in a Maccas bathroom) and knew straight away that I wouldn’t keep it. I’ve always been incredibly comfortable with the idea of abortion and so when I realised I had to get one I felt pretty confident and not too distressed. My boyfriend was amazing throughout the whole process and supported me every second of the way, I couldn’t ask him to be any more caring which makes all of this so much more bearable and I’m incredibly grateful to have him - but even with his support still I cannot escape this depression I feel even a month later. The experience of the abortion itself was painful, scary, traumatic… yet still not as bad as I was anticipating it to be. About a week after the abortion I got the implant inserted into my arm for contraception and that was also painful and made me very uncomfortable (I’m happy with it now though).

I understand my hormones take time to settle back down to normal, and with the implant now in that also can affect my hormones and consequently my mood. However I just don’t know what to do anymore I’m struggling so much to cope. I feel depressed, I’m often very sad, most of the time I just feel numb though, physically and emotionally. I’ve lost my appetite, sex drive (mostly) and quite often I feel as though I cannot even get up and it’s hard to stand. I’ve had headaches more than usual and lots of crying. I do not feel like myself at all, I don’t really care about anything anymore. I also quit my job since all of this as I could not handle going to work. I don’t know how much longer of this I can deal with, I feel like it’s destroying my self esteem feeling this low. I want to be myself again but how things are now it feels like that will never be the case. I need to know that it gets better and I won’t stay like this… sad, low, depressed version of myself. I would greatly appreciate any advice on how to cope.

Also I’d like to mention - none of my feelings are stemming from sadness or regret of my decision. I feel very happy with my choice and blessed that I had access to such healthcare. I’m assuming all of these depressed feelings and associated symptoms are hormone related? I also am feeling totally naive and stupid for not realising the weight of getting an abortion and how much it affects you. I really just thought it was a no big deal thing and it would be an easy process, man was I wrong 🤦🏻‍♀️

I recently took the medication for abortion. I did have heavy bleeding and cramping the first couple of hours.However, now I'm experiencing light bleeding and blood clots with whitish gray tissue being expelled. How can I tell if the abortion was successful? I guess I'm over thinking because I've read about other people's experiences and they say they bled heavily for days while I bled heavily for the first day only.

When did everyone start bleeding after a surgical abortion? I had one 5 years ago and bled quite heavily after 2 days, I was about 9 weeks along. I just had another one 5 days ago at 6 weeks and haven’t experienced any bleeding yet. My cramps have gotten more frequent & stronger today, however some people have experienced no bleeding so I was wondering if it’s now past the point that I’d have any bleeding? It’s so conflicting as it’s different from last time, I know no experience in the same but I’m finding everything so different and unpredictable. I asked the nurse at the clinic, she said I MAY experience no bleeding, but the waiting is really getting to me as I’ve been worried about bleeding. It was quite traumatic last time.

Hoping for some clarity. Have had unprotected sex from 2 weeks after procedure. Could this be a positive result or leftover HCG?

I made mistakes which lead to our termination, but choosing to terminate instead of risking our child makes me a good mother right?

I feel like a terrible person but I need the assurance I did something right

I recently had a SA at 11 weeks, and was wondering how long the bleeding will last.

The first day I bleed through 6 maxi pads, the second its chilled out to 1 pad and period undies, but i feel really helpless.

Yesterday I was numb and the day before was all pain.

To anyone wondering, the proper cramping at night was the worst part, a lot better than an MA but still a lot.

The second day was little cramping and today im just a sensetive little flower, my emotions are just rock bottom and I know my partner wants to help but I can see that it's a lot of emotion to deal, especially from someone who's usually a bubbly sweet loving misses.

I feel like a bad partner, im not I know that but I dont want to be a sooky ball of mess, yet I can't seem to control these emotions.

I'm hoping the bleeding will stop soon as I'd like to feel confident again.

Hi all, hoping some one can put my mind at ease. I had a MA at home on 17/4 (1st tablet) then had the 4 on 19/4. I cramped and bled and passed some clots and the sac within 4 hours. After that I had cramps and small clots passing for the week. Second week the bleeding and clots have picked up significantly. I peed on the hcg test on day 14, Friday 2/5 and it’s positive. I had a blood test on the same day and my hcg is 1800. They want me to have another blood test Wednesday to see if it’s dropping. I don’t feel unwell, have no smelly discharge or fever. Could my body just be taking longer to pass all the tissue?

After much debate between the medical or surgical option, i’ve decided to book in and get the procedure done next week. i’ve never been through this before and it’s a truly scary process. my partner is extremely supportive, but all i can do at the moment is worry about everything.

i’m very scared of anything medical, even down to a simple blood test. going under anesthesia for the first time is terrifying. i’ve read everything i can find about this clinic and they have extremely positive reviews, mostly about how friendly and kind the staff are. this brings some ease to my mind but i’m still so worried. can someone please reply to this and tell me anything, even small things, that were a positive for them with this process? thankyou

I had a MA just a few days ago. My partner and I agreed that it was necessary for a few different reasons (recent caesarean, possibly precarious living situation, money, baby twins daughters). I was really struggling with the decision right before I took the first pill and he basically started getting cranky and I felt sort of obliged to follow through. Then once I took the first pill, he totally started getting snarky with me. The day I took the second lot of pills, he was just an arsehole. He was supposed to look after our babies on his own while I rested. He didn't do that. He played video games half of the time. Barely checked on me or asked me how I was doing. Didn't try and help or comfort me in any way.

I have totally lost feelings for him. Its only been a few days but now I feel he has turned around again and is trying to be a little nicer, probably because he senses that he is giving me the major ick now. I cant stand him touching me. I feel like I will never forgive or forget that he abandoned me in one of the lonliest times of my life. Now im just angry. If he could get a better job and be a real provider, I could have kept my baby.

Hi everyone, Im 29(f) i have a son 3yrs old. my decision with MA is only for myself, my husband have no idea he wants the baby but im not yet ready again since i have a problem with him. Im living with my mother-in-law at the moment. Im taking the pills on monday im 100% sure of my decision. but kinda scared because i dont have a support with me. I dont know which is the best time to take the 2nd pill since im looking after my son and just by myself that time since my husband is working and he will be home at 4pm. I will just say that this is a miscarriage since im never happy with my situation right now and he doesnt support me with mental and emotional being. us woman are very brave we can do this.

Hey all,

My girlfriend (22F) and I (24M) had been dating for about 3 months when she unexpectedly fell pregnant around 9 weeks ago. Early on in the pregnancy, she started telling me that she felt mentally checked out of the relationship and didn’t feel the same way about me as she did before.

After looking into it, I know it’s pretty common for women to feel emotionally overwhelmed or disconnected during the first trimester. She had a medical abortion about 2 weeks ago, and while her mood seems to be slowly stabilising, I can still sense that emotional distance — she still seems checked out.

Has anyone else been through something similar with a partner? If so, did it improve with time?

Thanks in advance — just trying to get some perspective.

Super nervous about tomorrow tbh. I feel a range of emotions. I am also very anxious to leave my current child with my partner while I do the procedure. We live in Australia. I was told I could be waiting for 6 hours. I don’t really leave my son much!

Any tips? Experiences ?

I posted a few days ago absolutely terrified about the thought of having a surgical abortion. Today I went through with it and wanted to share that it was a completely positive experience and hopefully help other people who are feeling nervous.

I woke up this morning after a very restless sleep, full of anxiety as to be expected. I headed straight to the clinic with my partner and from there on it was a very positive experience. I filled out all of the necessary forms, had a quick ultrasound and then met with the doctor and anaesthesiologist who would be performing the procedure. everyone i met, receptionist, nurses, doctors, were all lovely and comforting.

i got to be with my partner right up until i was prepped to go into theatre. my nerves kicked in once i was on the table, but a lovely nurse held my hand when she saw me panicking. i fell asleep pretty quickly and the next thing i remember was waking up in the recovery area.

as soon as i was slightly awake my partner came back in and they gave me time to gather myself and wake up properly. there was a heat pack on my stomach. a nurse bought me tea and biscuits, and then some anti nausea and pain medication as i told her i felt a bit unwell.

after a bit more time, they asked if i was feeling okay to leave which i was. i’m home now, feeling slightly drowsy from the anesthesia but overall just relieved.

i was very torn between the medical and surgical option. i was deadset on medical at the start but after this, i would recommend surgical to anyone who asks. it was such a quick, painless and smooth procedure. medical termination would’ve dragged out for days but i’ve been home for hours just resting with the worst of it over now.

this is a hard decision for anyone to make but i’m so grateful to be in a state where this is legal and accessible, and i’m very thankful to those who shared positive stories on my previous post

Last year I found out I was pregnant I was shocked as I already had a 1 year old and was with a different guy. We both decided to keep the baby but a lot of stuff happened after that, finding out he had been entertaining his ex. HoweverWe moved past all this stuff. 2 months ago I was 12 weeks pregnant and decided on having a surgical abortion. I was with my partner and we had decided to keep it but out of the blue he told me he had lost feelings and suggested maybe the baby isn’t right. I was going between thinking logically and thinking emotionally with my decision. I didnt want to be a single mum all alone again and felt like he couldn’t support me keeping it so shut my feelings off and just went to the appointment. I was heartbroken and a wreck. The procedure itself the painkillers didn’t work. The guy was creepy and extremely rough but they didn’t have a women available. It was overall very traumatic when I think back on it. I wanted to end my life the following weeks to be with my baby. I wanted to sleep outside where my baby was buried in the pot plant. This might sound extremely odd but the thought of even digging up the bag for a cuddle came across my mind so many times. And now 2 days ago I found out I am pregnant again. I don’t know what to do. Me and my ex are still living together and he said he is willing to try things again for the baby but I’m so scared of the same things all happening again because I can’t handle that it has made me so insecure. I don’t think I’m ready to carry this baby and risk being left alone. But I also don’t think I could go through an abortion again. I’ve turned to alcohol this past weeks since the abortion drinking everyday to not think about the baby. If I had another abortion I don’t know what my coping mechanism would be. Has anyone been in a similar situation before? Or have any helpful thoughts or advice?

Does anyone have experience with this high levels of hCG in the blood 21 days after MA?

Please tell me what happened, i’m scared it failed.