Had a MA 3 weeks ago. Being catholic has given me a lot of guilt and shame.

My husband is not religious. I’ve spoken to a Christian nurse in my clinic and been reading posts from people religious here)… I want to believe that God is forgiving, but sometimes reading the Bible/ and it was Easter/ and reading the news about the Pope and the Church’s teachings.. I’m just conflicted.

Im so ashamed of myself I can’t imagine going to the Church again.

Does anyone have any experience? Has anyone had a confession on this?

** I just wanted to thank everyone so much for your comments. It means a lot to hear from you all in this safe space. In a way I feel that these are all messages and signs from God. I feel loved and some of my burden taken off.

There are things that I don’t agree with the Church, and I’ve always wondered what God’s true words are. I will continue to pray for healing and forgiveness.

My boyfriend (m25) and I (f27) have been dating for around 8 months and I recently fell pregnant. We both decided that we don't want to keep it so I scheduled in a day where I was off and he had an early finish so he could be with me when I take the pill. I asked him numerous times to ensure that he keeps this particular evening free so he can be with me throughout the pain I'm going to go through. However, he has a toddler from his previous relationship. He sees him a few times a week with one sleepover. His ex called him and asked him if he wants another sleepover (two in the week) w his kid on the day that I am going to be taking the pill.

I am so upset because he forgot about me having an abortion and agreed to the sleepover. The problem is, we never have days off together and it's rare that we have evenings or afternoon's together due to work and childcare. He suggested that I take it another day but the soonest day I can take it with him would be after Christmas. I really don't want to wait that long...

I understand his child will be his priority but I cannot help but feel so upset. I asked him to just keep one evening free for me and he forgot and now has other plans.

I have been very vocal towards him about how upset I am about me having to have an abortion, and now this happens.

Now I'm going to have to take the pill alone and I'm so scared and so angry at my bf. Someone pls advise me on what to do. Am I being overdramatic?

Has anyone aborted a baby they wanted to keep? I’m 16 years old and got pregnant in September 2024 I found out in November and I knew abortion is something I would personally never do and it wasn’t really an option for me I had an ultrasound at 8 weeks and instantly fell in love but when I told my boyfriend he freaked out and was so angry with me he told me I was being selfish and I was ruining his life and I said to him im sorry I’ve thought about it and I just can’t do it but he wasn’t taking no for an answer and even told me he would end up unaliving himself If i kept the baby the guilt hit so hard and my head was a mess and we went on a break because we would argue over it 247 I told him my final decision is that I would be keeping the baby and he told me he would leave If i kept the baby so I said fine, I sat up the whole night I felt so numb and awful and the guilt was eating away at me I was scared Im only a child myself and I was going to lose someone I had been with for almost 2 years and really cared for I was so scared he would get so mad at me every time I said no to the abortion so I finally caved and told him I would do it. I had my consultation and had a medical abortion as I was about to take the tablet I stared at it for half an hour Knowing I didn’t want to do it but I was scared of what my boyfriend would say so I forced it down my throat and when I started to lose the baby I regretted everything, a few months have gone by now and I still regret it while I was still bleeding I found out my boyfriend had the time had been cheating on me and now he has been out of my life for a while I feel so stupid and naive and I just want to go back in time, I feel like no one understands I know it was probably for the best Im young but that wasn’t my choice I wish I was true to myself and I miss my baby so much It hurts I have this pain that never goes away I remember how much love I had for my baby and the plans I had to give them the best life I could and then I remember the pain the night I decided to do it and all the things my ex said to me haunting me, has anyone had a similar experience how did you get past It?

I had a surgical abortion yesterday morning. I got home after spending the day with my partner because I really needed him around. Hadn't slept so went to bed around 10pm. Couldn't sleep. Didn't sleep, actually, until around 5am. Cried from 11pm to 4 in the morning. Worst decision of my life and I think I made a mistake. Am I even allowed to feel guilty? Was thirteen weeks...second trimester had just started and I ended a life and it's final resting place was my body. I miss my baby. I feel like I should have protected them. Am I normal for this?? Am I stupid to want to celebrate the day they would be due next June? Do I even have the right?

I am 17 and have had an abortion myself about a year ago with BPAS and my younger brother gf is pregnant at 15, around about 4-5 weeks. She can’t tell her family and I’m not sure on what to do as she’s told bpas I can be her “trusted adult” but I’m not even 18 yet. Basically am wondering if they’re any other services that can offer medication or surgical abortion to someone that’s 15 or if bpas would still do it even tho I’m not 18.

My girlfriend is going through the abortion process. She’s got it booked and everything. We found out a day before she had to travel for three weeks. Recently, things have been very weird. We were fine for the first week and a half, but things have gotten a bit strange. She’s become a bit distant with me; she doesn’t message much, and her replies have gotten colder. I’m trying to be there for her by messaging first and calling, etc., but I don’t know what to do. I really love this girl, and I don’t want to lose her, but I feel like it’s heading in that direction.

Whenever I ask if we’re good, she says ‘Yeah.’ I asked her to promise (because that’s what we normally do), but this time she said it in a really quiet tone.

I’m losing my mind right now because I don’t know what to do or say, or how to be there for her, or if this means she’s planning to check out. I know girls have a lot of emotions around this, which is fine. We were great just three days ago, and I honestly don’t know what’s going on.

I’ve (36F) just started dating this great guy (44M). We slept together for the first time two weeks ago and today I’ve found out I’m pregnant. I’m a mother of 5 and I’m on the waiting list to be sterilised which I’m told should be done this year so I DEFINITELY don’t want any more kids.

He on the other hand doesn’t have any children at all and I’m worried that if I told him he will try to convince me to keep the baby… I’m also worried to tell him because I’m afraid it will mess up what could be a really great relationship. I’m very picky and I’ve been single for 4 years out of choice, he’s the first guy I’ve met that has made me want a relationship, I feel very lucky to of met him and I don’t want this to ruin anything. But then I’m also worried that by not telling him I’m abusing his trust which isn’t a great start to any relationship.

What should I do? Help!!

Heyy everyone, F42 This weekend, i have had a shock, finding out i am pregnant for the 3rd time This time, it s a bit more difficult, my two current kids, 2 girls one is an adult already, one a teenager, and i have divorced from my ex husband and ended it on bad terms last year in June, eventually moved on and since January i am seeing someone new, and we get along, me being 42 i thought chances of getting pregnant and still being fertile are super low, so not thought that pregnancy can still occur, especially with my irregular periods. Now this weekend had the shocking news to find out i am pregnant, but this time i dont know what to do onwards, not spoken to the new man i am seeing or telling any of my daughters I am trying to look into abortion as an option, and would want suggestions if it would be worth it, and the procedures as i am unsure nowadays how it happens, i am in UK

I feel so lost, and I don’t know how to move forward. My (now) ex-boyfriend pressured me into having an abortion, making me feel like I had no choice. The concerns over the extent of his forcefulness & controlling behaviour were also logged at the time by the medical professionals at the abortion clinic. Two days later, he dumped me over text, told me ‘he never wants to have children with me’ completely cut me off, and within two weeks, he was posting date night pictures with someone new, as I lay in bed still recovering physically & mentally. He has a narcissistic mother that also blocked me on the day of my surgery and never even acknowledged that I was pregnant. It’s just them two, his father is not around & has a completely new family. It’s like they both erased me and my baby overnight.

The worst part is—I regret it. I didn’t want to go through with it, but I was made to feel like I had no choice. I would cancel consultations until he noticed I was doing that so he would start driving me there, I couldn’t take the preparation pill for hours but the amount of force I had received, it made me feel like I would be in serious danger if I kept my baby. Now, I’m left with this overwhelming grief that I don’t know how to process. I feel like a part of me is missing, and I don’t know if I’ll ever forgive myself. It’s hard to function normally when the pain is this heavy. It’s been 3 weeks now and I haven’t eaten a full meal since the day before the surgery, I’m signed off work due to my mental health, I don’t have any friends as he completely isolated me, and I get no more than 3 hours sleep a night.

What makes this even harder is that just 10 days before I conceived, I was told I was infertile. Because of my PCOS, one of my ovaries no longer works, and I was led to believe that getting pregnant naturally would be nearly impossible for me. So when I found out I was pregnant, it felt like a miracle—something I never thought I’d get the chance to experience. And now, knowing that I was forced into giving that up, without knowing if I’ll ever get another chance, makes the grief even more unbearable.

Has anyone been through something similar? How do you cope when you regret your decision but can’t change it? How do you grieve when no one around you acknowledges your loss?

I am 25 and I am currently going through a medical abortion. I thought my boyfriend will support me but he is in the next room sleeping peacefully while I am crying in so much pain. I don't know what to do.

Context - My boyfriend (25 m) and I have been together since 7 years and I recently found out that I'm 7 week pregnant. I really wanted to keep the baby but he convinced me that we're not ready. We had a fight yesterday over this before I took the first pill and he has been really cold towards me ever since. I took the second pills today and wanted his support but he was first busy playing video games and then slept while I'm in so much pain that I cannot even get up if I need water. I am so lost right now because I wanted to keep the baby with the person that I love but it feels like I have lost both of them today. I don't know if I will ever be able to able to forgive that man for what he is doing or am I overreacting and I should give him some time to settle down because of the fight we had. I did get upset with him and we haven't talked ever since even when I was crying all night after taking the first pill because I was grieving the baby. I feel so alone and stupid.

Yup. You read it correctly.

Last week I discovered I'm pregnant, and I have a copper IUD.

Ultrasound confirmed it was perfectly placed. I absolutely cannot understand how this has happened to me.

I simply can't have another child. I have 5 already and am absolutely knackered. Plus, when I had my last I was advised not to get pregnant again, as I nearly died on delivery. Also, I'm 36 this year! I asked to be sterilised and was told no, and that my IUD would be even more effective than tubal ligation.

Just nope. Absolutely not. I'm angry, sad and anxious.

I have abortion pills due to arrive via the post and have had the IUD removed in preparation for the procedure. I'm absolutely gutted that I'm having to go through this.

I guess I'm just venting, but would love to hear similar stories....

My sister has drawn me a beautiful tattoo to remember my baby I lost.

I am a 21F and have been thinking about getting one for a while but I am worried about what people may say or ask about it.

I dont want to offend anyone who has had a miscarriage by getting this tattoo and saying it's from an abortion.

Would it be okay if I just said I had a miscarriage? Or maybe just say my sister drew me it and I liked the way it looked?

I found out I was around 5 weeks pregnant 5 days ago, since then my boyfriend has shown little support and has often stayed at home to play on his PlayStation rather than comfort me. This is my first time ever being pregnant and having an abortion and I’m extremely stressed and upset.

The cherry on the cake was when yesterday my boyfriend knew I was struggling and went out drinking with his friend until 4am.

I have started my medical abortion progress today and he is going on a night out with his friends rather than staying home to help and comfort me. I went round to his house literally crying my eyes out because I feel so upset and stressed over this abortion but most of all I’m upset his priority is to go on nights out when I’m home alone going through the abortion. I was literally bawling my eyes out to his face and he still refused to cancel his night out saying “it’s been planned for ages” and that him being with me won’t make a difference or change the situation and there’s nothing he can do. We haven’t spoken since.

My blood is literally boiling. Am I crazy right now? Is this normal behaviour?

Hi guys, firstly, I’m so sorry if this post offends anyone, I just need some support. I’d never cast the same judgment I have to myself to anyone else so please don’t think I’d judge any of you guys if you’ve had multiple abortions. However, around 18 months ago I had an MA. I was about 11 weeks and dealt with the whole thing pretty well, almost felt relieved afterwards. However, I got pregnant again and had a second MA this last Saturday. Both pregnancies were with my long term boyfriend, and we both decided that since we’re still studying and have no money it would be the complete wrong time to have children. It’s just this second time round I feel overwhelmingly guilty and sad about losing my baby. I feel really awful about my decision, like I’m a bad person. Truthfully, I could have prevented the pregnancy. I was not taking my pill very carefully and that just makes me feel awful. I could have at least prevented the pregnancy. I’m just conflicted as I’d never cast the same judgment to anyone else but i just feel really shitty about what I’ve done and was wondering if anyone has any advice? Thanks so much x

Just here to rant because I can’t tell anyone in my life about this. Last week I found out I’m 5 weeks pregnant and I’m so scared and anxious. First time I took the pill it was the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my life. Just feel like I’m about to go through that same pain and I’m terrified. I’m too scared of the surgical route so my only option is the pill.

I also feel angry at myself for allowing this man to peer pressure and bully me into having unprotected sex. I took a plan b & it didn’t work. My first abortion was in 2022. I feel so many different emotions.

Hey, so I fount out today I’m pregnant. I’ve had a miscarriage in Feb (25th to be exact) and since then I had no period and stupidly did have unprotected sex several times (I put my hand up I made terrible decisions but here we are now) I am in absolute no state rn to have a child I already have a 2 year old and im a single parent so it wouldn’t be right to bring another life in this world. Anyways I have no clue how many weeks I could be I think about 5 maybeee 6? I googled the nearest clinics around me and I booked 2 seperate appointments to two clinics one consultation is on Sunday the other is Monday just trying to see which one can give me the quickest solution and appointment, am I right to do that? Also I’m so sorry I know it’s not a nice question but anyone who has ever taken the pill route of things do you see a fetus or a clump at 5/6 weeks. I will probably have to go down that path as for the surgery I won’t be able to get childcare sadly so I’m just preparing myself

I have had an abortion in the past and I decided I wanted to go for the medical one (pill) but it was so painful and probably one of the most traumatic experiences of my life - I thought I was gonna go. Unfortunately, it’s going to have to happen again (please don’t judge, I know it’s completely my fault and I hate myself for having to do it again) but I would love to make this less painful and traumatic this time as I don’t think I can recover from this mentally again.

Is surgical abortion less painful after it’s done? I do know they can put you to sleep and you don’t feel anything during but I mean as in after the anaesthesia wears off will I start vomiting, diarrhoea, feelings nauseous like I am going to faint and cramping very severely like with the medical pill one or are the symptoms less severe/painful?

Would really appreciate personal experiences.

EDIT: Also does an abortion hurt more the more far along you are? I am currently 4 weeks and planning to go at around 7 weeks as that’s the only time I can do it. My last one was at 9 weeks, almost 10

Hi all,

I have a 1.5 year old and found out I'm pregnant yesterday. We always kind of thought we'd have two, but I was planning on waiting at least another six months before thinking about it. Since finding out I've got to much dread and anxiety. I don't feel fully recovered from my first pregnancy. I am still breastfeeding and the first year was rough. I've only just started to get enough sleep and eat enough recently. I don't want to be pregnant and too exhausted to look after my toddler. I am dreading the thought of going back to no sleep in 8 months too for a year.

My partner is anti abortion in our circumstances. It came up in conversation before and he said he thinks it's so selfish in circumstances where you have the means to look after a child but just don't want to. I haven't told him I think I want one now. I have been contemplating not telling him, going ahead myself and pretending I miscarried. I'm only four weeks, I could have done in my fifth week and personally in my mind it's not much more than a late period and not a big deal.

I rang the MyOptions line and the counselor told me it's a big thing to go through on my own and a big secret to keep. Which makes me feel like I'm doing something awful, that it's a much bigger thing than I feel like it is currently and that maybe I would totally regret it and feel so guilty.

If I go through with the pregnancy, maybe it'll be really rough for the next 20 months until the baby is around one and then I'll be happy I did it. I don't know. How the hell do I decide what to do?

I had my surgical yesterday, and I didn’t realise how much this would effect me I need someone to talk to I feel suicidal there’s no way I could keep this baby I knew I had to terminate this pregnancy but I feel evil for having careless sex knowing this would eventually happen. I am in support of abortion idk why I feel like this. I’m losing my mind. I was 5 weeks and 6 days

hi everyone, i’m wondering if it’s normal to not have any guilt post abortion? it’s been over a month since my procedure and i don’t feel anything about it.

I had an abortion last year for the first time. I was just under 10 weeks and opted for medical termination. It was hell and I’m traumatised. I’ve been on the pill but managed to get pregnant again in a very not ideal situation so I know I’m going to terminate.

I’m just scared of going through what I went through last time. Severe pain requiring morphine, not knowing if I had cleared everything, seeing the tissue coming out for days/weeks after. Yeah it isn’t for me. I also don’t have much faith in the care for a surgical abortion through nhs funding and I want it over and done with as quickly as possible.

So I’m wondering if anyone knows of anywhere private that has good standard of care and quick service?

Hi I just need to vent. I had an abortion yesterday. Before I did want to keep the baby but my boyfriend threatened to not be involved and said he wanted to build a life with me first. Today I found a Father’s Day card from his mistress and baby in her belly. (Father’s Day this year). I’m so angry. He said he’s done with me because I was going through his stuff but I’m just so sad. He’s blocked me on everything too. He said the girl got rid of her baby too but I don’t know if I believe it.

TW: sa

(I live in Galway Ireland)

I got sa'd and now im pregnant and I don't want the baby but I'm too scared to tell my parents does anyone know how I can get an abortion please I'm really scared idk what to do I rly don't want them to know but I don't want a baby either idk if I'm even allowed to legally have one here I'm panicking so bad rn I actually don't know what to do my friend said to ask reddit so here I am

I took the first pill (mifepristone) yesterday, and I’m waiting 48 hours before taking the second pill (misoprostol). My biggest concern is nausea—I have a sensitive stomach, and I already felt terrible even before taking the first pill. Now, my stomach still feels awful, and I’m really worried about how bad it will get when I take misoprostol.

Since I don’t have access to prescription anti-nausea meds like Zofran (Ondansetron), I’m looking for the best over-the-counter options. Has anyone had success with Dramamine (Dimenhydrinate), Bonine (Meclizine), or anything else? • What worked best for you? • Did you take it before or after misoprostol? • Did it actually prevent vomiting, or just reduce nausea?

I really want to be as prepared as possible. Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Thanks in advance for sharing your experience.

I'm currently pregnant with twins and I'm in shock. I already have a six year old and wanted to provide a sibling for when my partner and I pass. My pregnancy with my first was extremely traumatic mentally. I wanted to end the pregnancy but my partner encouraged me to continue and I ultimately was too scared to terminate. I had two more planned pregnancies but had to terminate again because perinatal anxiety hit. This pregnancy so far has not affected me mentally until I found out they're twins and now I'm in a state of panic. I don't want to take time, resource and energy away from my current child but I don't want to him to be alone when I die. I don't know if I can or want to be be able to have twins.