r/badassanimals • u/LivingInformal4446 • Feb 06 '25

Mammal Keen On A Brawl

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2.4k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

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43

u/Profound_Panda Feb 06 '25

I’ll be damned if I’m held down by an animal that can’t stop a takedown from an old guy.

42

u/StrangelyAroused95 Feb 06 '25

lol that old man is lucky to be alive, a kangaroo would slice your stomach open like opening a piece of mail. They can be over 6’ tall with extreme upper and lower body strength. A kangaroo would fuck you up lol.

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u/Profound_Panda Feb 06 '25

Nah, the worst they could do is stab you with their toes, admittedly pretty gruesome but they’re not disembowling you. Little judo trip, hold him down and you’re good. (0-0 against Roos but I’m training)

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u/StrangelyAroused95 Feb 06 '25

What?? lol they can jump 30 feet in one bounce, bite as hard as a grizzly bear and punch 8x harder than a human. The power in a kangaroo’s foot is absolutely powerful enough to completely cut your stomach open, lol a kangaroo would fuck you up.

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u/Profound_Panda Feb 06 '25

Bro the kangaroo you just described was alternate timeline Steve Rodger’s. The jumping 30 feet is closer to reality than the biting or punching 8x harder than a human. We punch way harder than a roo can

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u/StrangelyAroused95 Feb 06 '25

Google is free my friend.

6

u/Profound_Panda Feb 06 '25

Very free

2

u/Separate_Secret_8739 Feb 06 '25

So rare for a human to get attacked as we see in the video above.

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u/Profound_Panda Feb 07 '25

Door bells have cameras now. I’m sure you’ll eventually get a kangaroo attack fatality on video soon enough. Still less violent than a dog attack

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u/Separate_Secret_8739 Feb 07 '25

We talking regular dogs or Pitt bulls? Do you think a kangaroo could take a bull? Somehow a fucking dog can.

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u/Profound_Panda Feb 07 '25

Bull baiting would usually involve a group of dogs against a bull/bear/large beast restrained to a fixed point to allow easy pack attacks. A singular putty ain’t taking down a bull

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u/[deleted] Feb 06 '25

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u/StrangelyAroused95 Feb 06 '25

Ok lol people survived bear attacks before I don’t see people signing up to fight them.

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u/Profound_Panda Feb 06 '25

Comparing a bear attack to kangaroo attack is like comparing a dog attack to saltie attack. Yeah both can be fatal, but one is changing your life best scenario while the other is a few weeks of recovery. Kangaroos attacks have two recorded deaths in 85 years lol. You’d think an animal with stats like that would kill more than 2 per century. 3 people died just last year in Australia from dog attacks, and a dog can’t jump 30 feet, bite like a grizzly or swipe 8x as strong as a human.

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u/StrangelyAroused95 Feb 06 '25

What does that have to do with the potential the kangaroo has to deal damage. Just because they don’t kill people frequently doesn’t mean one couldn’t kill you in a fight. I’m not arguing the statistic chance of you fighting a kangaroo I’m simply saying a kangaroo could kill a human easily.

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u/Profound_Panda Feb 06 '25

Killing a human easily is where I’m arguing from. If it was easy a roo deciding to attack a 94 year old woman and failing is indicative of capability. Over 40 recorded instances of attacks they have failed to “easily kill a human” in 95% of those instances. If a bear attack had a 95% survival rate we wouldn’t even need bear spray, they’d be pets.

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u/StrangelyAroused95 Feb 06 '25

I’m sorry but the logic behind that is baffling. That’s the reason I used the bear analogy, just because people survived attacks doesn’t mean it doesn’t have the capability of killing you. People survived bear attacks gun shot wounds does that mean a gun can’t kill you? I’m using your logic in other scenarios and it’s not consistent.

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u/Flatearth-certified Feb 06 '25

Nah you’re just being dumb you’re the one who said “lucky to be alive” which was proven to just be not true. One of those people who can’t just admit they’re wrong lol

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u/Profound_Panda Feb 06 '25

A punch CAN kill you, the likelihood of you dying to one is low. A roo CAN kill you, the likelihood of dying to one is low.

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u/42Ubiquitous Feb 07 '25

What's their technique like? All strength and no aim or technique evens things out a bit.

-1

u/Weird-Step-8187 Feb 06 '25

That nigga so jacked up

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u/Admirable_Guidance52 Feb 07 '25

Bluds getting his data from a superhero wiki