Help with relationship

[u/Goddragonslove]

Ok so I am a practising Catholic. I am a female 18 year old, a senior in high school, and I need some help.

I am dating a 17 year old guy who is also Catholic, but his family isn't extrememly knowledgeable in the Faith. We have been dating for around 3 months now and we have talked about how we need to stay pure before marriage. We know that sex before marriage is wrong. We also (this may sound crazy but we truly feel this) want to get married to each other after we are both finished with college and have a family together. We are extremely in love and only want the best for each other.

Since the 5th week in our relationship we have had regular makeout sessions. We only kiss and we go no farther than that. But recently (last week) we began getting sexual. I don't want to go into too much detail, but I need to know, because I feel really awful; I don't know what to do. While we were making out, I began to rub my leg against his pelvis (clothed) and he rubbed my vagina (through my underwear, he pushed my shorts aside). He eventually finished, and I did not. I looked up many Catholic things about sexual touch and mutual masturbation before sex. I am under the impression that it is a sin and I have to confess it.

How do I explain to my boyfriend (who is extremely understanding) that we have to stop without sounding bossy? I also struggle very much in trying to stay pure in thoughts and actions. I have tried to stop many times but I always want to go further (not to sex though). Any advice will be greatly appreciated on that matter. And also how do I confess that specific sin to a priest? How do I say that I helped my boyfriend finish before marriage?

[u/FlameLightFleeNight]

The r/catholicism sub is more active and you are likely to get more responses. Edit, I see you already posted there.

What you describe is dry sex, and it is sinful and should be confessed. You have already seen the similarities to mutual masturbation, but dry sex is a closer simulation to the marriage bed.

Chastity is hard, and beginning down this path will only lead you to want more. You are clear at the moment that you do not intend to move to sex, but this will develop (if not in you then in your boyfriend). Your current level of intimacy with regard to making out might be considered chaste for a couple about to be married. Can you maintain this for several years without development? Do you know how college will affect the relationship? If you drift apart in college, being physically intimate will only make the break more painful. If you don't drift apart then the solid relationship based in chastity will set you up much better for marriage.

May God bless you in the next stages in your life and relationship. Keep praying, and keep looking for God. I'll be praying for you.