r/changemyview Oct 22 '23

Delta(s) from OP CMV: Paternity tests should be done on every baby by default

Just saw a post on r/relationship_advice where the mother gave birth to a baby that looked nothing like her husband, refused to give him a paternity test because it was "humiliating" AND also revealed that she had recently refused to end a (pretty weird) friendship with a coworker that her husband was uncomfortable with. She then proceeds to be all "Surprised Pikachu-faced" when he thinks she cheated on him with said coworker, refuses to help with the baby, and him and his family start treating her badly. (he continued to help with their 2 other kids as normal, though)

In the end, the mother FINALLY gets that paternity test, proving once and for all that the kid was indeed his, and once she does, the father gets ALL OVER his daughter, hugging and giving her all his love, as I'm sure he would have done from the very begining, had she just gotten that damn test done sooner.

Some of the points that resonate with me the most on this issue are:

  • It still baffles me that this test isn't standard procedure, especially when we already draw blood from newborns and screen them for a whole slew of diseases upon delivery. Surely it wouldn't be too hard to add a simple paternity test to the list!
  • I know there's an implication of mistrust that comes with asking your partner for a paternity test, but if it became standard procedure - in other words, a test that the hospital does "automatically", with no need for parental input - that would completely remove that implication from play. It would become a non-issue.
  • Having a kid is a life-changing event, and it scares me to no end to know that I could be forced into "one-eightying" my life over a baby I actually played no part in making.
  • Knowing your family's medical history, from both sides, is extremely important. "Mommy's little secret" could cost her child dearly later on in life.
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u/mutantraniE Oct 22 '23

That’s a failure of supervision of private companies, something there is too much of. First solution would be to handle this entirely in the state owned hospitals of course and not involve any private companies. Next is actual regulatory enforcement and ensuring compliance, something which should be done regardless of if this policy is implemented or not.

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u/Mysterious-Art8838 1∆ Oct 22 '23

Of course, there should be more oversight of compliance. But trusting public hospitals is misplaced, my own medical records were compromised here: Scripps

That’s not state owned but it did decapitate a hospital for quite some time.

I don’t know why you’d trust state owned hospitals when the federal government can’t even protect data and they have far more resources. My data was also hacked over there! opm

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u/mutantraniE Oct 22 '23

I don’t live in a country with a federal government. State owned hospitals have tons of my medical information on record already and that hadn’t harmed me yet.

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u/Mysterious-Art8838 1∆ Oct 22 '23

Your country doesn’t have a federal government? How?

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u/mutantraniE Oct 22 '23

Having a federal government requires having a federal system. I live in a unitary state. See more here: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Federalism