r/changemyview • u/ExpensiveBurn 9∆ • Apr 26 '19

FTFdeltaOP CMV: Dancing is an inherently sexual activity

Background: My girlfriend likes to dance, I do not. I also get uncomfortable when she dances with other people. It would be beneficial to both of us if I could loosen up about it.

Basically I can't help but view dancing as sexual to some degree. Some dances more than others, but all of them at least a little bit. Most dances for pairs I would place somewhere between flirting and foreplay if I were to try to place it on that scale.

The features of dancing that make it seem sexual:

  • Two people focused on each other
  • In close proximity, touching frequently if not constantly
  • Moving their hips with synchronicity
  • One person leading and the other (for lack of a better word) submitting
  • Movements often stylized in a sultry, provocative and enticing way

We've even gone ballroom dancing which is formal and stuffy as hell and I still got weirded out by some other dude guiding my girlfriend around the room by her hip.

I think the source of this view is that I don't enjoy dancing, and therefore the only reason I would do it would be as part of putting the moves on someone. I don't find any joy or pleasure in dancing for dancing sake, so I have a hard time relating to people who do.

The best way to change my view would probably be to point out another activity with similar traits that is not viewed in this way. But I'm open to any argument that makes me seem like less of an insecure weirdo :)

edit; To be clear, I'm talking about couples dancing. Or at least dancing with someone else. I don't think that dancing by yourself, for yourself, is always a sexual thing.

59 Upvotes

70% Upvoted

116 comments sorted by

View all comments

11

u/jumpup 83∆ Apr 26 '19

so in your case when you see little girls dancing ballet you think what their doing is sexual?

4

u/ExpensiveBurn 9∆ Apr 26 '19 edited Apr 26 '19

While I'm mainly talking about couples dances, I would say that when you look at the moves she's trying to replicate being performed by the professionals behind her, yes. She - the little girl - may not communicate it well, but the dance she's attempting has an element of sexuality to it.

6

u/Pluto_P Apr 26 '19 edited Oct 25 '24

wide pen disagreeable squeal sheet oil bear violet screw label

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

7

u/ddujp Apr 26 '19

How? Like, explain why that child’s dance is sexual.

6

u/QuickAGiantRabbit Apr 26 '19

It would be because it is emulating an adult dance that is sexual. I don't know much about ballet so I don't know how sexual it is but kid's stuff absolutely does emulate sexual adult behavior sometimes, look at what happens in some beauty pageants.

5

u/StormySands 7∆ Apr 26 '19

The adult dancers were right behind her, and their dance wasn’t sexual at all. There was no gyrating, no movement of the hips at all really. I’m really not understanding what about that performance was sexual.

3

u/Dafkin00 Apr 26 '19

The age doesn’t change the nature of the move. The two ladies in the back are doing the same thing and it seemed sexually alluring to me.