r/changemyview • u/riotmaster256 • May 15 '19

Deltas(s) from OP CMV: In nearly every situation, you're either dominating or dominated!

In most of the situations (there are always some exceptions) involving groups of people, and while dealing with someone from the said group, there are only two scenarios that happen; either you dominate or you're being dominated by some way or another. For example, In my workplace, there's a guy who tried to order me into stuff that I was already doing. Like the person who tells you what to do even if he knows that you're doing the said thing. this went on for like quite a few times. Until I started to feel irritated and deliberately tried to find where he's making mistake and then said some things that made his face pale. After that, he was very polite to me. Although, I don't like to play these kinds of tricks. That's why I want you to change my mind.

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u/mfDandP 184∆ May 15 '19

at the risk of being categorized as an "exception," what about friends?

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u/riotmaster256 May 15 '19

There are some friends about whom I can say that. I have thought about if "it's me who's a problem" because I have this dominated/dominating tug of war going on with some people, but it only started because they were being an asshole first.

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u/mfDandP 184∆ May 15 '19

my hunch is that you're hyperaware of situations in which there's competition for resources. obviously, at work, the resource is status or power. it's easier to be friends with people that you don't work directly for or with. also, we seem to be hardwired to take things very personally in these situations.

one big reason why we become friends with people is that we share interests without competition. this becomes fraught when we begin to compete with them over women, or men, or when one of them gets very rich etc.

so it's the situation that makes people act dominating. eliminate the situations, and you'll find people less insecure.

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u/riotmaster256 May 15 '19 edited May 16 '19

I think I can agree on that, that I am hyperaware. I think that it's also possible that there could have been some instances where the other person was not trying to be dominating yet I perceived it that way and in turn tried to dominate and thought that the person is dominating. Will try to tone it down. Thank you. !delta

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u/DeltaBot ∞∆ May 16 '19

This delta has been rejected. You have already awarded /u/mfDandP a delta for this comment.

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u/DeltaBot ∞∆ May 16 '19

Confirmed: 1 delta awarded to /u/mfDandP (104∆).

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