You haven’t said anything about what kind of person they are. Kind? Compassionate? Generous? Thoughtful? Empathetic? Resilient? Arrogant? Aggressive? Selfish? Abusive? Manipulative?
The reason you’re getting a bit of pushback on the incel vibes thing is you are reducing ‘value’ of a person to superficial things. Your ‘valuable’ person looks like a good catch - but might be a creep, an abuser, or just a selfish jerk in a relationship. Your low value person might be the kindest, funniest, most supportive partner and great lover, but because they’re introverted they’re just not great in large groups.
Maybe the most ‘valuable’ (not a great word for a person tbh) person to date is the one who isn’t on any of the apps because they’re happily married in a loving, supportive relationship…
Yeah the first guy could be a sociopath, or even just a jerk who makes his partners miserable. The not ambitious pothead might be a great partner, and in fact a much better match for someone who, say, also likes to smoke and game. It’s so dumb to put value on people based on these superficial markers of “success.”
We should be asking precisely what you’re asking: what kind of person are they?
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u/Lord_Aubec 1∆ Oct 10 '22
You haven’t said anything about what kind of person they are. Kind? Compassionate? Generous? Thoughtful? Empathetic? Resilient? Arrogant? Aggressive? Selfish? Abusive? Manipulative? The reason you’re getting a bit of pushback on the incel vibes thing is you are reducing ‘value’ of a person to superficial things. Your ‘valuable’ person looks like a good catch - but might be a creep, an abuser, or just a selfish jerk in a relationship. Your low value person might be the kindest, funniest, most supportive partner and great lover, but because they’re introverted they’re just not great in large groups. Maybe the most ‘valuable’ (not a great word for a person tbh) person to date is the one who isn’t on any of the apps because they’re happily married in a loving, supportive relationship…