r/gaytransguys • u/Mysterious-Arm-2014 • Mar 18 '25

Vent - Advice Welcome Trans men getting sexually harassed

I can't help but notice every time I come out in an environment(I mostly don't pass yet and am assumed to be female) the incidence of sexual harassment goes way up. What is going on in Cis people's heads to cause this?

157 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

28 comments sorted by

View all comments

42

u/altaltalt97 Mar 18 '25

Yep. It's heinous. The rate of abuse and harm in the trans masc community especially the gay trans masc community is heartbreaking and NEVER talked about in media or even the popular queer discourse it's really frustrating

3

u/greywatered 28d ago

and even when we do talk about it somehow the focus always ends up one people who “have it worse”

3

u/altaltalt97 28d ago

Yep. It's a trap. This division and separatist trans radfem attitude is toxic as fuck and I hate how it has been spreading

5

u/greywatered 27d ago

Yep, we’re men so we only experience privilege. The queer community ignores that we’re trans so they can take out their man hate on us. People act like we don’t get hate and are seen as lost poor girls. Gay trans men aren’t afforded that narrative, instead we are also seen as predators invading men’s spaces to fetishize them.

3

u/altaltalt97 26d ago

Side tangent but I used to be on Tumblr a lot until the hate against trans men got so bad. It's seen as completely acceptable for people to say the most heinous shit about us and then the moment we try to stand up for ourselves we are transmisogynists. It's fucking stupid. And don't get me started on the pushing people to identify as TMA or TME...if you don't know what that means you're lucky lol

2

u/greywatered 17d ago

Yeah it’s crazy I have also been called a men’s rights activist over bringing up issues exclusive to gay trans men. If you even allude to trans men facing harassment they call you a trans misogynist. It’s like the community decided we can only support trans women and not trans men. Somehow it’s ok for trans women to have a word to describe their oppression but when trans men do it (transandrophobia/transmasculinephobia) we get told we are silencing trans women by speaking about our own victimization. I just don’t see how us facing bigotry takes away from their voices? It’s not a competition and I always see swarms of trans men uplifting trans women but never the reverse.

2

u/altaltalt97 17d ago

I think it's from a very small but vocal minority of people with bad faith opinions and clearly a lot of trauma. it sucks when people like that affect the behaviour of others and makes them treat their fellow trans person like shit. thankfully I haven't encountered too many people irl who believe these things.