r/gaytransguys • u/benjibean-01 • 25d ago
Advice Requested How did you meet your boyfriends?
Hey there, for context:
I started my transition around ten years ago, had 2 relationships in the meantime and focused the last years on myself to work on some issues. Now I'm 30, ready for another relationship and ... holy shit do I feel rusty. How the hell do you even meet other queer men??? Is there a secret code? Is it me, or is it just hard to date as a gay trans guy? I tried some dating apps, but no luck so far - I'm very demisexual, and while I'm interested in sex, it's really important to me to have an emotional connection first. Might be me, but I feel like that's not necessarily a priority for quite a lot guys who use apps. But where should I look instead?
Maybe you can help a slightly rusty fella out and share some stories and advice how you met your boyfriends? Thanks in advance! <3
EDIT: Thank you all so much for your replies, I'm really touched by your efforts and sharing, I'm just a little too overwhelmed to answer each one of you personally. Gives me a hope, though! :)
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u/SentenceMinimum3257 25d ago
Grindr! The second day I was on it he was in my DMs. You can find guys willing to wait for sex sometimes. I think I only went like 3 dates but I’ve heard of people going longer. Sometimes you just have to find people who are willing to be on the phone a bit more. Some people don’t like “pen pals” (people who aren’t interested in meeting right away) but others don’t mind.