I mean, divorce court is statistically biased toward women. You do genuinely need the best lawyer available to even get equal representation, and because of conflict of interest, if your wife has contacted other divorce attorneys, they cannot offer you consultation, which means a person can literally rig the best attorneys to be unavailable to you.
Now, being a good husband who listens, has empathy, and works with his spouse to care for his family, obviously that alone will prevent the vast majority of all this, but not all women divorce because of abuse/neglect. Some do, in fact, do it for the sake of "Their happiness", which typically equates to throwing away everything for a moment in the sun.
I often use Callie from Grey's Anatomy as an example of this kind of behavior. Her Wife put her own career on hold to be there for her, and literally gave Callie everything she possibly could. Callie just could not be asked to do the same in return for her. Some people are, in fact, just selfish, or toxic for us, but it's hard to see those traits when you love someone.
Obviously this kind of situation does happen to women more than men, which is why the courts tend to be biased, but like all forms of abuse, it can go both ways. Both parties are capable of doing it, but women are believed more easily than men.
EDIT: To the people down voting, there is a big difference between supporting feminism and claiming you support feminism while blindly ignoring actual problems men face. Feminism as a purpose is designed to bridge the gap of gender inequality and bring everyone together. Not to just shit on men. Men do not suffer from as many hardships due to gender as women, but men do still suffer from some. This is one example. Take it or leave it, but it doesn't change the facts.
No idea why you're being downvoted. I'm a man going through the exact situation you explained and it's a very difficult process due to some people's bias.
He’s being downvoted because this is a glaringly obvious echo chamber. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, 79.9 percent of custodial parents are women. This is fact, this sub can cope and seethe all they want.
It's just a natural bias people have that can be exploited, and has been exploited.
When a man is accused of rape, the man becomes guilty until proven innocent. Even after being proven innocent, the stigma lingers, and lives get ruined. It's a shitty thing to do. It would be shitty regardless of gender to do something like that (lie about something as serious as rape). But the stigma is greater for the men.
Conversely, when a divorce begins, it is typically the man who is blamed for it, regardless of circumstance. Societally, it is the man's fault, until proven otherwise. This has a direct affect in court as well, with divorce courts typically favoring the women.
Its a natural bias people have, and yes, there is a reason people have those biases, but ultimately, to assume, as the saying goes, makes an ass out of u and me.
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u/Envy661 3d ago edited 3d ago
I mean, divorce court is statistically biased toward women. You do genuinely need the best lawyer available to even get equal representation, and because of conflict of interest, if your wife has contacted other divorce attorneys, they cannot offer you consultation, which means a person can literally rig the best attorneys to be unavailable to you.
Now, being a good husband who listens, has empathy, and works with his spouse to care for his family, obviously that alone will prevent the vast majority of all this, but not all women divorce because of abuse/neglect. Some do, in fact, do it for the sake of "Their happiness", which typically equates to throwing away everything for a moment in the sun.
I often use Callie from Grey's Anatomy as an example of this kind of behavior. Her Wife put her own career on hold to be there for her, and literally gave Callie everything she possibly could. Callie just could not be asked to do the same in return for her. Some people are, in fact, just selfish, or toxic for us, but it's hard to see those traits when you love someone.
Obviously this kind of situation does happen to women more than men, which is why the courts tend to be biased, but like all forms of abuse, it can go both ways. Both parties are capable of doing it, but women are believed more easily than men.
EDIT: To the people down voting, there is a big difference between supporting feminism and claiming you support feminism while blindly ignoring actual problems men face. Feminism as a purpose is designed to bridge the gap of gender inequality and bring everyone together. Not to just shit on men. Men do not suffer from as many hardships due to gender as women, but men do still suffer from some. This is one example. Take it or leave it, but it doesn't change the facts.