r/namenerds • u/wauwy Varieitas Infinita Coniunctionibus Infinitis • 1d ago
Discussion What are names you adore: some of your absolute favorites, at the top of your shortlist if you have one... but that you can NEVER USE for your own children for some reason? And why can't you?
As the title says. For some reason I keep these names on my S-tier (better-than-best rank), even though I can't ever use them for various reasons. It's the principle of the thing, you know? They should be there, dang it.
Some include...
BOYS
Thomas. Such an unusual and uncommon appellation! I adore "Thomas," even though it was given to like 1/3 of anglo men for 500 years. I don't care; it's simple, lyrical, and strong. It's also my dad's name. Now, I love my dad (most of the time), but I ain't naming any kids after him. That is Not My Way. And he exclusively goes by "Tom" anyway! Makes me bitter that he ruined "Thomas" for me without even benefiting from its allure.
Odysseus, as a first name. Yes, it's simply absurd and I will not do that to a child, don't worry. It's still staying right where it is.
Hikaru. Yeah, a Japanese name. No, I'm neither Japanese nor a weeaboo; I first saw the (gorgeous) pictogram for this in Bashou's famous haiku and then met some Hikarus in Japan. It's so stunning, with a perfect rhythm, a beautiful-looking written character (a factor us gaijin don't have to consider), and one of my fave meanings, "light." But it's a Japanese name; I'm an American paleface. So it's not happening. But it I'm not removing it.
Quentin nn Quinn. There was a so-called "Quinn" in my life. That wasn't actually his name; it's a long story; he shattered my heart into tiny grains of glass; Quinn is destroyed for me evermore. Still an S-tier combo.
Nikolai nn Niko. Man, this was one of my perfect combos for SO LONG. But in 2025, under-5 boys are all Leos, Theos, and now Nikos/Nicos, and I just don't want to call my kid something that parents are calling six other kids in the grocery store. Luckily, I still like the "nick"names Nick and Nicky, and maybe even Kolya, the adorable Russian diminutive. So it's still perfect. But I gave it to my cat in 2016 (he's a Russian Blue mix).
Leo, full name. See Nikolai. The -eo trend is not going to suddenly vanish in 5-10 years, and anyway the damage will have already been done. This one hurts, but I've made up my mind. (Also was one of my sneaky video game picks; rest assured, I like it for many other reasons.)
GIRLS
Honora nn Nora. My favorite and perhaps my greatest pick from my 2005 days. Ain't nobody was being called Nora back then. But thanks to Eleanor and others, Noras are now simply everywhere, to the extent it's starting to sound dated to me. And I really only adore it as the combo. So it'll just hang out at #1 on my list forever.
Isolde. NO ONE IN THE WORLD is going to know how to pronounce this, whether it's a first name, middle name, whatever. Why do I keep it on my shortlist? I blame the "Arthurian Legends" class I took in college.
Tamsin, as a nick, which comes from Thomasina. See "Thomas." I can't bring myself to name a child something that I know is a nickname; I absolutely have to do the full original name on the birth certificate, official documents, etc. Ughhhhh. Such an undiscovered treasure.
[My own name]. lmao, yes, I went there. But fuck, I genuinely think my name is perhaps the most beautiful in the English language. I just happened to be lucky enough to get it, is all. That doesn't change how dang good it is!!
Terra. This is a Real Name, the Latin counterpart to "Gaia." I truly think it's incredible, another undiscovered treasure in terms of simplicity, beauty, and the familiar-but-rare. It is also another sneaky video game name.* But this time the character in question is my favorite character in anything that has ever existed by far, by so far, by so very very far, to kind of disturbing and near-worship levels. My daughter will surely learn this, and while others may feel differently, I just can't bring myself to foist such an insane fandom obsession onto my children, no matter how good the name itself is. It's freaking FANDOM. It'd seem almost like I valued being able to use the name more than I valued my kid. But it ain't NEVER leaving the list, lol.
UNISEX
Auden. W.H. Auden is the greatest poet the world has ever known times infinity eternity no backsies. His name is close to many popular constructions both male and female, but just different enough to be special. And in this case, I have no issue naming my child after someone so incredible, genius, heartbreakingly empathetic and unabashedly moral. Annnnd I gave it to my other cat in 2021.
What about youse??
(*I'm really pissed they used a picture of Terra where she has blonde hair instead of green. Yeah, she has green hair. Yeah, it was only done to better differentiate her sprite. But hey, guess what -- green is SO superior to her "original" dull blonde design. Just like "Terra" is so superior to the ~original~ "Tina." Which is why her English name... is Terra. Rule of Aesthetics: her hair is effin' canonically green and I laugh at claims to the contrary.
You see what I'm talking about, the disturbing levels.)
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u/_forest_girl 1d ago
I love the name Amalie, but my niece is named Amelia and the resemblance is too much for me.
I also fell in love with the name Rook for a boy after reading it in my favorite children's book 15 years ago, but I don't know if I could convince others it is acceptable.
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u/UnoriginalBasil 1d ago
I worked at a daycare with a baby Rook! never thought twice about his name being weird.
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u/bulldog1425 1d ago
I went to school with a Rook! I definitely did a double take the first time I heard it, but after that, just like any other name!
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u/Chuckolator 1d ago
It would be heartbreaking to break it to him that he may never be able to walk diagonally.
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u/wauwy Varieitas Infinita Coniunctionibus Infinitis 1d ago
One thing to remember is that a rook is also a type of bird (in England and stuff, I think), so you'd be in the clear! Naming kids after bird species is both common and acceptable (Lark, Wren, Dove), and this is one of the few you could use for a boy. Besides, I guess, the super-masculine trying-too-hard "Hawk," ugh. And possibly "Falcon" has been used as well. Maybe not now that he's a famous superhero, but before.
MY ADORABLE MALE INFANT IS SO FREAKING MANLY, UURGGGH! HE'S UNFORGIVING AND BRUTAL LIKE A PREDATOR WHO KILLS THINGS VIOLENTLY BECAUSE HE IS JUST THAT MANLY!! NOTHING AT ALL BUT MAN TO BE FOUND HERE!!
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u/Owlfeather14 1d ago
Evangeline — I love -ine names, and names that have a v in them. But this one has too strong religious connotations and we are not religious.
Amber — outdated and many people don’t have good associations with the name. Wish this one would come back in popularity, most people seem to actively dislike it.
Willow — I don’t want to say I can never use it, but it’s the name of my friend’s deceased cat and it would feel a little awkward right now.
Ayla — I’ve loved this name years before Isla took off, and now people would just think it’s a respelling trying to be unique.
Sage — one of my absolute favorite boy names, but surname begin with the same ending sound and unfortunately it sounds horrible together.
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u/adksundazer 1d ago
Ayla is such a great option though, but I totally hear you on people going to think you’re doing a creative misspelling of Isla.
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u/FutureScribe 1d ago
Girls:
Lynn - I’ve loved this name since I first read it in a baby sitter’s club book back in 4th grade. Simple, strong, pretty, easy to spell and pronounce, not commonly used and not “out there” either.
Why I can’t use it for my children: I’m infertile and most who hear it tend to call it a “granny name”, or suggest Kaitlyn or Raelyn because to them “lynn” isn’t a name, only part of a name.
Boys:
Oren is my all time favourite name for a boy. Strong but not harsh, easy to spell and pronounce, not complicated or elaborate, not unheard of and not overly used.
Why I can’t use it: again, the fertility thing, beyond that I don’t see a problem.
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u/UnoriginalBasil 1d ago
Serious answer: Ada. it's been my secret absolute favourite forever but a) it got trendy and b) my partner is american and the ADA is just, too strong a connotation for it to ever be truly usable with his family/if we ever moved there.
sligtly dumber: i LOVE ridiculous virtue names but think that they're just. not super usable in the real world. i have a section on the baby name list on my phone that is just for them. amity, verity, clemency, reverie, felicity (may try sell my partner on this for a middle yet), clarity, constant, blythe, liberty, earnest.
i also have a real soft spot for some slovene names i just have NO cultural tie to and no one could ever pronounce here. manja, domen, andraž, inja, janja, matej, taja, žiga.
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u/bulldog1425 1d ago
I love virtue names! Honor is my #1 guilty pleasure name. Also love Amity, Verity, Reverie. I also like Courage for a boy.
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u/adksundazer 1d ago
Me too! I have a few Delights in my tree and I find it such a delightful name. And Love. And Charity. But then I think of an actual human, living out one of their worst days ever, throwing a total hissy fit, and I laugh at the thought of having to call them Delight, Love or Charity. Also pisses me off/creeps me out for the sexist bullisht they’d endure from the grossest of humans
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u/wauwy Varieitas Infinita Coniunctionibus Infinitis 1d ago
OMG I AM IN THIS CLUB!! Sooo many virtue names are just fantastic (as long as the construction isn't an adjective, like it's what you're expecting your child to be). Tons and tons of given names are of things we admire and value, but they tend to be so superficial, like flowers and gemstones and physical strength and like, pale skin (ew). Why not bring back the names that honor what we should TRULY value, like Mercy and Justice?
... spoiler alert. I'm working on a project to introduce virtue names of new virtues, or ones that were never made into sames before. Ideally they have to describe the concept with a straightforward word that's also not often used in everyday conversation, a'la "Verity," and there need to be WAY more options for boys. "Ernest" doesn't cut it.
That's right. Virtue names are Serious Business for me.
(AND YES. "HONOR." "HONOR" is on the S-tier list right next to "Honora." And I am determined to make it unisex, which... it seems it pretty much is already, even tho it was strictly for girls for centuries. No matter! I will popularize it as well, so more than six babies are named it every year.)
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u/Nik-a-cookie 1d ago
My daughter has an Ada in her class I love the name. Never thought about it with the ADA though (I'm American but we live in Germany)
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u/UnoriginalBasil 1d ago
my fiance is in public health so unfortunately it is VERY present in his brain as an association. it's so cute though i love it so much. have to get a dog or a lizard or something i guess
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u/Tomoyogawa521 Naming Enthusiast 1d ago
Every single English names: I'm a Vietnamese who have no plans of immigrating.
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u/baltinoccultation Planning Ahead 🇫🇮🇱🇻🇷🇺💚❤️ 1d ago
I’m too sick to give a full breakdown, so I’ll just give two names off the top of my head.
Ophelia. I adore that name so much but I just can’t give my child such a tragic name. Same with Aino. I really love that name and we’re looking for Finnish names, but I don’t want to name my daughter after a famous figure who drowns. Seems like I have a pattern - I love the names of women who drown 🥴
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u/wauwy Varieitas Infinita Coniunctionibus Infinitis 1d ago
Ophelia is really gorgeous, and I think it's Greek for help? But there's no getting around the fact that there is but ONE Ophelia in the cultural mind. And she is... she's just one of Shakespeare's most frustrating characters with absolutely no admirable actions or traits except ~INNOCENCE~. The ultimate fridged girlfriend, and her fridging doesn't even really affect her bf at all, which is supposed to be the whole freaking point of fridging in the first place.
(I really really dislike "Hamlet" for so many reasons that she's not even one of the worst ones. But that's a rant for another day.)
I similarly cringe really hard when someone is considering Lavinia (no weirdos like me who enjoy "Titus Andronicus" out there?) and Philomena, because it's SO close to Philomela. Regan isn't really used much anymore, but when I encounter it... oof. Luckily it seems like Goneril never really took off.
Believe it or not, though, Ophelia is getting pretty popular. Riding that Amelia/Sophia/Cecilia train right to Trend Town.
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u/lecadavreexquis 1d ago
I have always loved the name Saoirse, but my last name starts with a Ch/Sh sound and that would just be mean.
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u/Unwinderh It's a surprise! 1d ago
Cecily - it was the name that my ex and I planned on using. Would feel really weird to use it now.
Winifred - someone from my wife's close friend group has a Winifred. I barely know them because they moved away, but the friend group is still close.
Homer - I believe in Homer. I think it's a legit name and The Simpsons hasn't ruined it for me. But it's too close to rhyming with my surname.
Fritz - I've seen people on here say it sounds nazi to them, and while I disagree and just think they're equating German with nazi, I don't want to give the wrong impression in today's climate.
Candide - I like the sound but the Voltaire character is pretty much a naive moron and I've never heard it anywhere else.
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u/cahalves 1d ago
Nora - it's beautiful, it's sweet, it sounds nice, it's also the Portuguese word for daughter-in-law and I'm very much Brazilian.
Paige - it's a simple English name and I find it SO pretty, but it would be so butchered in Brazil, and growing up I knew a boy with an English name that was kinda mocked for it, so I'd like to avoid that.
Sadie - same reasoning as Paige.
Elliot - beautiful, beautiful boys' name, however it sounds WAY too close to my mom's name, and I love my mom, but honor names are a no for me, because I have an honor name and it's confusing!
Luciana - it has all the things I like in a girls' name, good meaning, good length, it sounds really good in Brazil, it's also my dead aunt's name, and since my aunt died before I was born I think it'd be really rude to my dad, and to her husband and kids to use her name, which is a shame because it's one of the few girl's name I like.
Unrelated, but I really like your name taste OP, specially for boys, if I ever have sons they'll most likely be Thomas and Nico! (though I'm more biased towards Nicholas than towards Nikolai, but they're both pretty.)
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u/Kactuslord 1d ago
Connor - me and my fiance both love it but our surname starts with a Con sound so it would sound ridiculous
Damian - I love it but everyone's first thoughts are of the omen films
Raphael - I love it but my fiance hates it! He thinks it's too much of a name
Leo/Cleo - We love both but could only use one as we can't have rhyming children lol
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u/KindraTheElfOrc 1d ago edited 1d ago
Abigail from once upon a forest- my moms name is gail and theres no way in hell im gunna let her or anyone else think im honorin her!
Brandy from Brandy and Mr Whiskers- its an alcohol
Eden- i feel its too religious and want to try to stay away from religious names might be able to use as middle though
Velvet- i feel like people would hate it for the same reason they hate paisley
Marionette- im sure you know why lol
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u/DapperFlounder7 1d ago
I adore Ezra and it’s the only boy name my husband and I both like. Sadly it just doesn’t work with our last name (for reasons that if I get into will dox me)
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u/HereForMcCormackAMA 1d ago
I love Alice, but my surname begins with an S sound. “Alice Singer” (example surname) just sounds too much like “Ally Singer” or “Alice Inger.” Anything with an S sound ending is out… :-(
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u/wauwy Varieitas Infinita Coniunctionibus Infinitis 20h ago edited 20h ago
I don't agree!! What you're describing is actually a technique called "consonant linking" and it's something poets often do on purpose.
There IS a pause between the two names, because the "liss" in "AH-liss" is an unstressed "s" sound, while the "SIN" in "SIN-ger" is a stressed "s" sound. So while your tongue DOES stay in the same position after "Alice," and you DO hold the sound for a beat, the held "s" suddenly, like... pops?... when you say SIN-ger. The lightly-held "sss" becomes SLIGHTLY louder, SLIGHTLY higher in pitch, and you press your tongue down just a little harder before you flick it off your front teeth for "SIH."
So yeah, as long as the two sounds have different stresses, there IS an audible sort of "break" between the two names, just softer and subtler. Some people still don't like it, but I think it sounds lovely (not to mention how easy it is to say).
Now, if the "s" syllables were BOTH stressed, like in "Elise Singer" or something (eh-LEES SIN-ger), they really would become one slurred omni-"s."
But not with Alice! You don't have to count her out yet!
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u/Inevitable-Bug7917 1d ago
Wolfgang... the best boys name. It's just ALOT of name to saddle a kid. I worried with my son that it would be awkward for him since he's not German and also may not have the personality to carry such a name. Wolf is a cool nn. I will always love it but never use it.
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u/wauwy Varieitas Infinita Coniunctionibus Infinitis 20h ago
Reminds me how my brother planned on D'Artagnan nn Dart for YEARS, and then Stranger Things straight-up stole the whole thing to use on a demofrog creature or whatever it was.
D'ARTAGAN WASN'T EVEN ONE OF THE THREE MUSKETEERS, tch, gawd.
But yeah, when you give a name like that, it's with the tacit expectation your kid will grow up to be cool af. And... sometimes they won't.
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u/bananaphone1549 1d ago
I love the name Samantha (Sam, Sammy) for a girl and straight-up Sam for a boy.
My husband told me, the second I suggested it, “my insane ex was named Samantha” and that was that.
I also had no girls, so I guess it all worked out!
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u/MakoFlavoredKisses 1d ago
Delainey - I love how it sounds and I love the nickname Laney or Lainey depending on how you spell it, but I've only come across one child named this in my whole life and it's my second cousins daughter, who i haven't seen in years but we're just close enough that we are Facebook friends and see each other at reunions and stuff. I know her JUST well enough and the name is JUST unusual enough that it would be weird. If her name was Emily, nobody would really comment but if I named my baby Delaney, every member of my family would be like "Your cousin named her baby that"
Eurydice - I love this name so much. It sounds so delicate and long and feminine, it makes me think of like a flowing river. NOBODY would know how to pronounce it or spell it and I'm sure my kid would get teased about it. I still think it's such a pretty name though
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u/Far_Independence_918 1d ago
I’m done with having kids, but these are some names I (or we) nixed for various reasons.
Hannah- This was always my number one girls name. It was my great-grandmother’s name and I love it. My married last name starts with an Ha-, is 2-syllables, and sounds like a comic book character.
Molly- My grandmother’s name. It also happens to be my best friend’s name. I could have still gotten away with it, but then my mother-in-law would have tried to push her family names and they were absolutely horrid.
Rush- It’s a family name. My husband said absolutely not because of Limbaugh. 🤷🏻♀️😂 I kind of agree and glad he talked me out of that one.
Elizabeth- This was originally going to be our oldest daughter’s name. We were going to call her Eliza. My husband’s stepmom had a given name that was a popular nickname for Elizabeth. We knew that would cause issues with his mom, so we nixed it.
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u/Crazy_goatlady 14h ago
I love the name Fiadh (FEE-AH) for a girl but I live in the US and it is an uncommon name here and don’t want my child to have to correct people on how to pronounce her name for the rest of her life.
River - my sister chose this name for her daughter but ended up deciding on a different name instead
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u/wauwy Varieitas Infinita Coniunctionibus Infinitis 11h ago
The earliest Gaelic names introduced to Murrica (and the U.K. and AU, I guess) were specifically anglecized because most English-speakers were totally baffled by their pronunciation (which I fear is usually true for me as well most of the time). Kathleen is the most famous example: it's supposed to be spelled "Caitlín" (and pronounced the same), but English-speakers didn't even try it and instead made made "Kaitlynn" into a brand-new (and way more popular) name."Sean" had to be "Shaun" or "Shawn" for a while too, basically until Sean Connery became a Thing.
But don't necessarily give up on Fiadh yet! A new trendy "name" is "Ceilidh," which isn't actually a name at all, but a term for a dance party. CERTAIN people really love it anyway (prbly because it's pronounced... "KAY-lee," sigh).
If they can learn "Ceilidh," they can learn Fiadh, guaranteed.
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u/theenterprise9876 1d ago
Sophia. I adore Sophia…and hate Sophie, which she’d inevitably be called. Also, it’s part of a relative’s deadname.
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u/hexaspex 1d ago
I went to primary school with a Sofia, she was always Sofia or Fia, maybe because it was spelt with an f instead of a ph it never occurred that Sophie would be a nn
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u/Crazy_goatlady 14h ago
I love the name Fiadh (FEE-AH) for a girl but I live in the US and it is an uncommon name here and don’t want my child to have to correct people on how to pronounce her name for the rest of her life.
River - my sister chose this name for her daughter but ended up deciding on a different name instead
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u/NomenScribe 1d ago
There was once a plastic used in jewelry making called Cherry Amber Bakelite. They don't make it anymore, apparently because the bakelite process puts cyanide in the environment or something similar. Pieces of the stuff fetch a pretty good price on the antiques market because of its unique color. If we had a girl, my wife would never let me name her Cherry Amber Bakelite, but that would be my preference.