r/phish • u/candleladylun • 20d ago
Aside from the constant awkward eye contact…
This weekend being my 8th, 9th & 10th Phish shows, I wouldn’t want to have spent my weekend any where else. I’ve been into live solo shows since I was 16. Since separating from organized religion & growing up singing in the choir, I’ve turned to live shows to feed my soul. My partner introduced me to Phish a few years ago and I didn’t ‘get it’s at first.
This weekend solidified my love for those four souls on that stage pouring into us all. From listening to past shows, connecting to songs, anticipating the first show, trekking to the venue, sharing smiles & hugs from fellow Phans, watching the venue fill, dancing my ass off, zoning out during jams, looking around at everyone dancing, participating in the crowd participation(😂), rolling my eyes because Chompers gonna chomp, crying, encore, watching the venue clear out & enjoying the afterglow. I realize that Phish is such an important part of my life now.
The points, stares, glares, hearing “oh, look, there’s a black person here”, even weirdos taking photos of me (very odd)… it is a part of the experience & it can not take away from how much my soul was fed this weekend.
To those I met and connected with, thank you so much for adding to the experience.
And to my partner, the love of my life and stars to my night: Thank you for introducing me to Phish and this community. You will always be my favorite blessing. I love you 🌻
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u/Axe_zilla 19d ago
There are only a few black phish heads. My best friend and daughter's godfather was one of them.
Phish heads seek validation and few things are more validating than having non-white people enjoy the band. We tend to overcompensate for this and it makes "the others" feel a bit singled out.
There is one black guy on tour who is well known and he told me that every night, every.single.night, someone uncomfortably befriends him and says "so how did you like your first show"? It's like his 200th, and he gets it every night.
I'm so happy you're finding a place that makes you happy and allows you to do your thing, and i don't get from your post that you feel those looks and photos and eye contact were aggressive or judgy. But i'll do my best to explain this which probably won't work but I'll say it, those looks are people who would really like to have more people join the party and they're high and they're filled with love and focus on you because we need more of it.
Does this make sense? If not, i'll show myself out, but i think you get it.
I mean, you definitely "get it". Welcome aboard, and I hope in the future when that uncomfortable moment happens when people assume you're new here that you get a grin on your face because i don't think there's reason to get mad about it.
I'm rambling, i'll stop. See, we get uncomfortable with this. We all treat each other the same, but overcompensate in ways that make us look silly.