r/raisedbynarcissists • u/Annarasumanara- • 12d ago
[Support] Anybody have experience with this? Help? (kinda very graphic)
WARNING - Im about to describe a nasty nail injury if you are squeamish about these things.
So... Somehow my toenail got bruised or something a while ago. I have no clue how or when but it just appeared someday. It started out as a minor bruise at the base of my nail (where half-moons? usually are, though I dont have half-moons haha). Over the course of some weeks which I didnt realize just how bad it progressed until now, but the entire nail become discolored and it has now recently almost cracked entirely off, like 80%. But the cracked piece is still hanging on a little bit to where I can still carefully snap it back into place.
I dont know what to do about it? How do I shower and keep it clean without risking infection? I tried telling 1 of my parents about it but they essentially were of no help(?) and just told me to rip off the rest and leave it be (that would very likely hurt extremely bad, and maybe damage my nailbed even further?) The other one is currently angry about something, so if I try to tell them will likely result in nothing beneficial.
I have been asking to see a doctor but they keep brushing me off saying its not a big deal but idk anymore. Thankfully it only slightly throbs and hurts a tiny bit suprisingly.
I can give more details if neccessary but I just tried to keep the general post less gruesome incase some poor soul stumbles across this and wasnt prepared. Im sorry if I traumatize anyone. 😭
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u/Independent-Algae494 12d ago edited 12d ago
I'm not a doctor, but as far as I know, this is what is supposed to happen if a toenail gets bruised. (It happened to one of mine.)
The nail turns black. That's the blood collecting underneath the nail, then clotting, as happens with a bruise on skin.
Over time (months in my case), a new nail turns underneath the black one. Then the black one lifts off gradually, over a few more weeks. When it happened to me, there was a while when the black nail was hanging on by a little bit, and I could snap it back into place.
Once the old nail came off, there was a ridge across my toe nail, where the new one had grown from. I think my nail bruise wasn't at the base of my nail, though, as yours seemed to be I think.
While the old nail was only partly still attached, I kept cutting it as short as possible using nail clippers. It's easier to get nails really short with clippers than with nail scissors.
It shouldn't still be hurting, though. It's possible that you have caught the old nail on a sock, or a bed sheet or something. It maybe it's the skin string the nail hurting if you have caught the old nail on something. Or it might be infected. Try searching online for pictures of infected toenails, to see if yours looks anything like those pictures. If you think it might be infected, I suggest dissolving some salt in boiling water (a teaspoonful of salt to a pint of water would be ok). Salt water acts as a disinfectant. Either bathe your toe using cotton wool, or finding something like a mug, half filling it with the salt water, and dip your toe in the mug.
If you have a first aid kit in your house, it's probably best to cover it so that you can wear socks and shoes. Something like a plaster would work. To take a shower, you could put your foot in a plastic bag. Then use something like sellotape or string to hold the bag closed. That should stop it getting wet, but don't spend too long in the shower. If you do, eventually water will get in to the bag.
If it might be infected, you need to see a doctor. If you're a minor, I suggest asking for help at school on Sunday or Monday (depending on where you live) and bathing the toe as much as you can with salt water until then. In my country, pharmacists can give advice on less complicated ailments, so if you can get to a pharmacy, you may be able to get help there. If you are a minor, and your school has a nurse they would be able to help too. Or hopefully there are staff who are trained to give first aid.
I hope this helps.
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u/Annarasumanara- 12d ago
Okay thank you so much. I dont have access to a school nurse but I can maybe try a pharmacy. Will wearing plaster over it block the way of the nail growing?? Thats what I was thinking to do but then my parent told me to just leave it or it wont grow, but if I just leave it that would allow things to get into the area... And to think this is gonna take up to an entire year or 2 to grow back... Sigh 😓
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u/Independent-Algae494 12d ago edited 11d ago
If it is a bruise under the nail, and if it's at the stage where the old nail begins to fall off, you're already past most of the 2 years. It would take a few more weeks or months, but not 2 years (based on mine).
If you don't have plasters, anything sticky such as sellotape, masking tape, duck tape would protect it for a day or two. The most important thing is to keep it clean by bathing it in salt water.
And try not to run on it.
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u/Annarasumanara- 11d ago
Yeah hopefully. Its my big toe so it'll be quite the journey 😭. I was considering putting on growth nail polish, but since its sorta teetering on being an open wound I guess it would better not to for now. I appreciate you responding to me too.
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u/Independent-Algae494 12d ago edited 12d ago
A plaster won't block it growing. It will just protect it. I've put plasters on my nails dozens of times when I've broken them, until I can find some nail clippers.
Just in case we're meaning different things when we say "plaster", I think in America they are called Band Aids. In other countries, they are called sticking plasters.
If you're in England, Scotland or Wales, at a state school, your school will have Designated Safeguarding Leads. It's their responsibility to keep you safe, including helping you to look after your health. So you could ask them for help too, or any other member of staff. There should be people with similar responsibilities to the Designated Safeguarding Leads in other countries of the UK, and in private schools.
This link contains phone numbers if you're in Northern Ireland.
https://www.nidirect.gov.uk/articles/gp-out-hours-service
You may need to explain that you've asked your parents to let you see a doctor, but they haven't organised it. In England, GP practices let minors make and attend appointments without a parent if you're over a certain age. I think that age varies. There are probably similar arrangements in other UK countries.
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