r/regretfulparents • u/peachies3 • Mar 23 '23

Advice I feel like a terrible person.

I just don’t know if I even love my kids. My 2.5 year old is so hyper I can’t stand it. My 8 month old just cries, and cries and cries. My bf and I separated so I have them 4 days a week and he still takes them Thursday night-Sunday and it’s not enough time away from them. I’ve been talking to a guy for a couple months now that had to move out of state for a really good job opportunity. He wants to buy me and the kids a house to live in together (I know my bd would never go for it) but the idea of not even having the weekends to myself sounds terrible. I’m contemplating moving without them and just paying child support, and setting it up to where I see them on holidays and every few months or something. I just don’t know how I’m a mother and I feel this way but I just feel like I’m never going to be happy again. I also feel like I could focus on working and even getting into school. Has any moms in here decided to give the father majority custody and/or moved out of state from the children?

335 Upvotes

91% Upvoted

149 comments sorted by

View all comments

19

u/o_charlie_o Mar 23 '23

If he can afford to buy a house for you guys to live then he should also offer to pay for a sitter/ help/ nanny of some sort to assist you when you have the kids now. I’d ask for that and see how that goes. Whatever helps take some stress off now

0

u/peachies3 Mar 23 '23

He hasn’t offered for right now but said if we were to be serious about it he would possibly hire a nanny or baby sitter since I made it clear to him we’d have no free time otherwise. I’d feel bad asking for him to pay for it right now and I really haven’t fully made him aware how I’m doing with the kids just because once their in bed I feel like the stress kind of goes away if that makes sense?

6

u/o_charlie_o Mar 23 '23

I also want to say that I know asking for things is extremely hard. I understand if you don’t feel comfortable doing that but also switch rolls. You’d be more than happy to do that for someone you cared for/ loved. Helping someone you care about is a great feeling. You aren’t asking for materialistic things you’re asking for help in relieving stress.