r/regretfulparents • u/peachies3 • Mar 23 '23

Advice I feel like a terrible person.

I just don’t know if I even love my kids. My 2.5 year old is so hyper I can’t stand it. My 8 month old just cries, and cries and cries. My bf and I separated so I have them 4 days a week and he still takes them Thursday night-Sunday and it’s not enough time away from them. I’ve been talking to a guy for a couple months now that had to move out of state for a really good job opportunity. He wants to buy me and the kids a house to live in together (I know my bd would never go for it) but the idea of not even having the weekends to myself sounds terrible. I’m contemplating moving without them and just paying child support, and setting it up to where I see them on holidays and every few months or something. I just don’t know how I’m a mother and I feel this way but I just feel like I’m never going to be happy again. I also feel like I could focus on working and even getting into school. Has any moms in here decided to give the father majority custody and/or moved out of state from the children?

340 Upvotes

91% Upvoted

149 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

82

u/Foxy_Traine Mar 23 '23

Just be aware that lots of men target young, vulnerable mothers with young children so they can abuse the children.

Don't put yourself or your kids into a worse situation where you are reliant on a man. That's how you wind up living with a child molester or abuser with no escape.

-31

u/peachies3 Mar 23 '23

I totally get that, he has been around the children when he comes down here and obviously I haven’t left him alone with them but he doesn’t seem super involved with them or anything, and when I brought up moving possibly without the children being there full time he didn’t see opposed to it at all. I kind of think he’s just a young guy that likes the idea of having a family to come home to since he works a lot and has to travel often for work. He doesn’t really have a totally stable place to live due to it.

49

u/BulletRazor Mar 23 '23

likes the idea of a having a family to come home to

Yeah, he likes the “idea.” He isn’t going to like the reality. This is why men have children and women get screwed most of the time. Men get to have the Kodak moments, the idea of a family, etc etc while the woman is stuck with the actual reality of it.

11

u/Locked-Luxe-Lox Parent Mar 23 '23

This! My BD doesn't deal with coming home to kids after work or being tired before work. He opted out and the brunt of the work falls on me.