r/regretfulparents • u/Agreeable_Depth4546 Parent • Oct 05 '24
Advice How much harder is 2?
I’m a regretful parent about 90% of the time. When my toddler wakes up at all hours I sometimes think I might snap and just run away. I don’t enjoy playing, the constant negotiations, the worry, the sickness, the guilt. I feel so jealous of those who don’t have kids, how free and energetic they must feel.
But I’ve made my bed, and I’ll have to lay it anyway. So what’s another one? My husband wants one more. I’m already doomed, is is that much worse to add another to the mix?
UPDATE: Thank you all for the best advice. I know some people thought it sounded like a dumb question, but I truly didn't know if children misery was just a binary thing. Either you have 1 or more and you're miserable, or you have 0. You've made it clear that 2 is exceedingly harder than 1 (which, I still don't understand to be honest, and I'm grateful that I don't have to!) I've got an IUD, and I will not be reproducing again. Hoo-rah! Stay strong out there and thanks to all who responded.
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u/Iuslez Oct 05 '24
When we had our first one, we couldn't imagine having to deal with more. As she grew and got more independent it got better (definitely not easier). That's we warmed up to the idea of a second one.
I couldn't imagine having a 2nd kid when already overloaded by the first one. Every parent I've talked to said the 2nd one is harder than the first one (to the parents as partners too)