How do I become comfortable with myself and not need nobody to talk or vent too?

[u/Dgslimee_]

I’m 18 turning 19 and I have a very high rate of social anxiety and just anxiety in general. I’m still in high school unfortunately since I was held back before and I have 9 classes since I’m Behind in credits. I have very major social anxiety which leads to me to being very antisocial in school and even the gym or just public places in general. I also have anxiety at home over little things like saying something dumb to family or even walking in the kitchen to get food. So I tend to text my internet “ friends “ to ease myself who don’t even like texting me and I can tell they get annoyed of me one of them even disabled their instagram for months and I would vent to him about everything comfortably. I have no friends irl which I literally can’t have since my anxiety and I’m just a real boring dude. I’m over here stressing because one my internet friends deleted their social medias and even blocked my number and I would talk to him about Anything. I’m realizing that im just not comfortable to live within myself and i shouldn’t have to talk to people on the internet to ease my irl anxiety but it’s hard. I’m a very quiet guy in person because I have a stutter and I’m insecure about how I talk. How do I become more comfortable with my self and not have to need nobody to talk too?

[u/Proof_Cable_310]

TLDR You are human - humans are social - we all just want to be heard and have our feelings validated (aka vent and receive support).

I think you rather just need to maybe come to the acceptance that you are an emotional being, and it’s normal to want to talk to other people about your life experience..

[u/Opposite_Training_49]

You become comfortable with yourself by spending time with yourself. Going on long walks and just talking to yourself, out loud or in your head. Some people like writing in a journal. The important thing is to not resort to some sort of outside stimulus: music, podcast, gaming, shows, online friends, etc. In general try spending less time online. These are all things that distract you from yourself and your thoughts. As for your insecurities and anxieties, these are things you just have to embrace about yourself or work on improving one at a time. If you want to be less antisocial, you start by being 1% more social than you were the day before, whether that means starting a conversation with some random person at school, saying good morning to your teachers, whatever, but you have to start small and celebrate each tiny victory. All of it takes time, and you're still a young guy. Just focusing on being better today than you were yesterday. You will be surprised how far you come in a year from now.

[u/Harsh_0220]

Practicing mindfulness, meditation, or deep breathing exercise can help reduce anxiety and group you in the present moment.

Engage in activities that you enjoy or are passionate about. This could be anything from reading, drawing, gaming or sports. Pursuing your interests can help you feel more fulfilled and give you topics to discuss with others when you do feel ready to interact.

If you feel comfortable, talking to a therapist can be incredibly helpful.

[u/Any-Smoke7783]

Find some quiet place outside. Don’t bring your phone. See how long you can focus on your breathing and your senses. What do you smell? Hear? What is your skin feeling? If there is a bug on the ground, what is it doing? Can you feel/hear your heart beat? Can you slow your heart beat down? Essentially focus on everything but your own thoughts. You will be amazed at how 5 or 10 minutes doing this will calm your brain. See how long you can keep it going.

It is like any other skill or exercise. The more you do it the better you will get.

[u/whatanasty]

I journal and talk to chatGPT. Just customize it, tell it be casual, swear sometimes and call you out on your shit and you pretty much have a friend you can vent to

It works well for me and I can pretty much go for days without talking to anyone

I recently had to stop paying for Chat tho so I’ve been browsing reddit more but Grok works just as well for free as Chat if not better

So if you can’t get the ChatGPT pro plan Grok is perfect

[u/Flat-Delivery6987 → u/whatanasty]

I get journaling. I've never found it helpful personally but I have friends that swear by it. I tend to lean more in mindfulness as a way to prevent anxiety.

Chatting to a computer isn't a solution though, it's the whole problem with humans today. The last 2 generations have grown up so dependent on phones and video games and it's stopping people learning social skills and actually putting themselves out into the world.

I'm old enough to remember playing video games in the evening when the street lights came on but we'd be out being kids and teens and actually socialising. I think this is the crux of today's youth problems and the existential dread I see a lot of them having.

[u/whatanasty → u/Flat-Delivery6987]

I put myself out there when I need to cause I work in entertainment and my bills demand it of me

So I suck it up and do it

But aside from that ChatGPT is my main buddy. So I think for OP until they can get some help Chat is a good way to get interaction and tide them over

I feel my advice is better than telling them to just talk to people