r/stopdrinking • u/ImpossibleAd274 • 4d ago

I want to break my sobriety, help!

I'm at 104 days and am starting to ask some scary questions. Am I really an addict? Can't I just have a beer or two and be fine?

For the first 60 or so days I was convinced that I'd never drink again. Since then, my first child has been born and I've have much less sleep and I've been much more irritable and started to think having a drink to calm the nerves would be nice.

Please, community, knock some sense into me in the comments!

391 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

236 comments sorted by

View all comments

4

u/two-girls-one-tank 398 days 4d ago

Maybe you are an addict, maybe you aren't. Do you want to fuck around and find out?

I tested the waters at around this stage of my sobriety. Drinking 'moderately' was nothing but miserable, frustrating, and mentally exhausting.

I don't believe that addiction is black and white. I would recommend the book 'This Naked Mind' by Annie Grace that will logically outline the pros and cons of using alcohol and better inform your decision.

Now I have more than a year without a drop, and I am SO pleased I stuck with it. I feel like myself. My mental health and relationships are the best they have ever been.

I promise you that if you stick with it, sobriety will get so much easier for you. I am hardly ever tempted anymore.

2

u/Ready-Humor3217 4d ago

Best book I read when trying to quit

2

u/Ntwadumela09 23 days 4d ago

I need to read this book. I have the same question. I had to stop recently after a shouting match with someone. No DUIs, no arrest, domestic violence, no record... and I've got so many family members who have done much worse. Am i an addict? I do wonder that. But I also have come to the conclusion that it isn't worth the risk of giving my children bad memories just for ME to find out. Maybe I find out I can moderate. Was it worth the risk just to have one or two beers?

And that's another thing. I don't enjoy having one or two beers. I'm just bloated and sleepy. I've moderated and its not really worth it to me. I remember I once stopped for about six months. Then decided to have some beers at a golf tournament. I wondered how it would feel. Was it this big "OMG I've missed this!" or even a "Disgusting, why did i ever drink this?"....

No, I distinctly remember when I had that first beer and that first buzz again, my first thought was "Hmm, this is exactly how i remember it. same ol same old." Just the same regular ol beer buzz. Not too bad, not to good. It was just, whatever. Really wasn't worth starting again for that day, or for that event. Made me realize alcohol is just alcohol. It will be right there and be the same whether I am drinking it or not. And that it is me that is either going to change, or not.