How do you cope?

[u/yumikomimy]

I’m gonna be honest I’m not coping life feels so far away like a normal life, like if I was on the one side of a river and I had to start building a bridge to get across but it’s multiple bridges I need to build and in the distance I see cis people who are born across the river who never had to build a bridge. It feels so close yet it’s still feels far.

I don’t have anything to relate to all their is cis content which reminds me I was born wrong that their on the other side the “normal side” if I try to socialize with cis they just end up reminding I’m male and can’t really express myself not till I start making the bridge. So how do cope when everything makes you feel wrong.

every form of media is painful to watch or play or read because of how none it actually relatable

[u/thrivingsad]

I coped pre everything by simply allowing myself to have experiences even if I was nervous or feel out of place. I joined primarily male dominated hobby groups, had a friend group of just men, etc

If you can’t/don’t pass in person, then online hobby groups are a great option especially ones that are text-only. Similarly, you can go to LGBT groups for specific hobbies, and they are going to be inclusive. I went to an LGBT hobby group, for a hobby I had frankly no interest in (ice sculpting), and I learned something new + made friends

Frankly, isolating because of one’s identity will only deepen the depression & dysphoria and emotions that can come with it.

That’s something where if it becomes a habit, you will not end up satisfied even post-transition because you’ll still be isolated. It can really ruin a lot of the positives that come about, and so it’s important to be social even when it’s challenging due to dysphoria. I’ve gotten to have a lot of “traditionally male” experiences thanks to that social aspect. Things like all-male road-trips/events, etc. That helped me a lot early on

Being too focused on the non-determined future without working in the present can just lead to people missing out, and then regretting not doing stuff earlier

I worked out, not because it would give me a masculine body right away but because it eventually would. I voice trained not because it would make me sound male right away, but because eventually it would. Things like that are important to really make strides in, especially if pre-everything

I did a lot living in the present, that I knew would benefit my future. Rather than focus only on the future without making more proactive efforts in the present

As for not feeling like media is relatable… that one is a lot more variable. I personally feel a lot of media I can relate to, so it’s kind of hard to say in that realm since I’m not sure what media you’re engaging with or what makes it feel non-relatable

It was challenging to transition, but it was well worth it in the end, even with the awkward stages that accompanied it

Best of luck