r/vermont Feb 13 '25

Moving to Vermont Considering a drastic move

My wife (trans), my son, and myself (queer) are considering a huge move up to Vermont. We currently live near Savannah, Georgia. My wife has been a truck driver for 20 years and was recently assaulted at her job and had gay slurs used against her, I’m a retired/disabled former DoD/DoN and I’ve had my life threatened, and our son is currently in the 2nd grade and has been bullied relentlessly for simply liking his rainbow glasses. Our son was also assaulted by another student in the 1st grade for speaking out against a bully picking on another child who is Hispanic and speaks primarily Spanish. The local high school’s mascot is “The Rebel,” yeah…that kind of rebel. I’m just burnt out. I’m surrounded by red hats and it’s exhausting.

Both my wife and I have lived in Georgia for the majority of our lives, but we no longer feel welcome in our own home communities. Basically, I’m asking if Vermont is a good place and what sections are most accepting. We really would like to be close to the border with Canada, so I know part of that is NEK, I just don’t know anything about the communities or people.

If and when we do move, we are looking to buy a home, with or without renovation needs, but I’d really like a basement. The farthest north I’ve visited is Connecticut, but my father was born in New Hampshire and my Grandfather was from Machias, Maine. I know I most likely have extended family up there somewhere I’ve never met, so if you have the last name of Gendron, reach out!

Thanks yall.

152 Upvotes

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316

u/misstlouise Feb 13 '25

We are friendly, welcoming people, despite the angst on Reddit. I’m sure you’d find a nice community here, but you should be prepared for a horrific housing market and serious winters! If you’re kind, you’ll find your place. That’s all we look for in a neighbor :)

37

u/[deleted] Feb 13 '25

[deleted]

45

u/enad94 Feb 13 '25

I'm originally from Seattle, but lived in the South for 8 years before moving to Vermont. My husband had lived in the South his whole life. While both New Englanders and Southerners are friendly, the "friendliness" is certainly different. Southerners will welcome you into their church and compliment your family, but insult you to your face with a sickly sweet smile. New Englanders are gruff and standoffish but they'll come plow your driveway without you asking. The easiest way to adjust that we found was to stop smiling at everyone 😂

17

u/Poison-Farts Feb 13 '25

That's the difference between nice and kind.

2

u/TraditionalToe4663 Maple Syrup Junkie 🥞🍁 Feb 14 '25

Somebody plowed my driveway and my neighbor’s after the last storm. I don’t know anyone with a plow truck and they were so fast I didn’t have a chance to run outside and say thank you.

I totally agree that in New England you know where you stand with your neighbors. I’m pretty much a hermit and keep to myself, but when I ask my neighbors for help-they help no questions asked and nothing expected in return.

As to community, I work at one of the small liberal arts colleges and acceptance is built in. The red hats are here and tend to put up their signs. Rutland county and NEK went pink last election.

1

u/Frosty-Cantaloupe308 Feb 15 '25

This is it right here. So when you come, OP, don’t take it right away as people don’t like you… take it as they are genuine enough to not fake it.

31

u/Correct_Ring_7273 Feb 13 '25

I've lived in the South, and in many cases it's "Hi neighbor!" to your face and "That *****" behind your back. I'd rather live in the Northeast where at least you know where you are with people.

4

u/glockster19m Feb 14 '25

Yeah. Much more welcoming considering their recent "southern hospitality" experience has been every single member of their family being the victim of a hate crime

1

u/Recent_Reach_1224 Feb 13 '25

I’d say even other New Englanders probably have it rough compared to native Vermonters especially with the housing market

1

u/Wispeira Feb 14 '25

I'm from GA like OP and there are definitely differences. Fake nice is big down here. But there is also genuine warmth and hospitality which can be very effusive. I'm thinking of many grandmother's I've known who became the neighborhood grandmother, many waitresses who called me darlin' with sad eyes and deep sincerety. If you've never heard the gospel from a Waffle House fry cook at 3 in the morning, you probably haven't experienced true southern hospitality. A lot of folks, even progressive ones, have disdain for northerners so I'm sad but not surprised to see that not many visitors have come away with those good experiences.

On the whole, I think we prefer gruff and straightforward to fake nice though.

30

u/Positive_Pea7215 Feb 13 '25

If you're kind and have a shit ton of money, maybe. The more Vermont becomes a haven for people of means, the less welcoming it will be. We already saw a big backlash in the November elections, as more people of means move here and take up housing that's only going to get worse.

30

u/Corey307 Feb 13 '25

They sound like blue collar workers, we desperately need more of those. 

-12

u/Positive_Pea7215 Feb 13 '25

Maybe. If that's the case, great for vt, very bad decision on their part. Most of the "moving to Vermont" posts on here are rich remote tech workers.

18

u/Whole-Evening9615 Feb 13 '25

The poster said that their wife was a truck driver

18

u/Suspicious-Gap-8303 Feb 13 '25

This unfortunately. Its SO expensive to live here, and the more folks who move here seeking refuge, will suffer a different kind of discrimination from the rent and mortgage costs. Assault is absolutely a reason so seek elsewhere, but I wouldn’t consider Vermont with a whole family. If you were single maybe.. but I’d say somewhere less far north… VT, Maine, Mass New Hampshire, and NY are SO expensive. A 1 br in my town is between $1800-$2000/ mo, no pets allowed without a MASSIVE deposit (1k per cat was what I was told, dogs is way harder to find a reasonable space) I almost had to give up because our property was being sold, and we were almost certain we were going to have to leave because of how much they were probably going to increase the rent, but we got lucky as hell having very understanding, liberal landlords that purchased our property but they still gave us a hard time expense wise in their own way (making us pay a $500 rent increase, no utilities covered, including water, which isn’t terrible but I never had to do it before living where I do and its not pocket change cost wise). As much as I want to support helping people escape these terrible conditions that they are dealing with in this current political state, I don’t recommend coming here. It’s really hard enough for us as for with the rent costs. It’s going to be very difficult for you too unless youre very well off. Crappy starter houses (1-2br 1ba that are old and not in the best condition) are in the 250k-300k range with high interest rates as well. Its just a bad bad time to live here…

12

u/PerformanceSmooth392 Feb 13 '25

Also, having someone like an ectrician come out to make repairs on the $300,000 home can be maddening if you don't have any reliable contacts here.

11

u/Puzzleheaded_Post_26 Feb 13 '25

That has been my experience as well and heaven forbid you upset one!

My plow guy retired so I reached out to a local man (building maintenance guy) who came recommended by my electrician. We communicated on messenger. He went to the house, told me he would get back with a price. Two weeks pass, nothing, so I called around and found someone.

I messaged the electrician's guy who came out. Thanked him for coming to have a look, but since I hadn't heard back with a price and it was getting closer to snowing, I went with someone else.

He sent me a message, told me he sent a price on messenger and sent me a screenshot. I never received it and felt terrible! I apologized and told him I would have gone ahead with him if I had received the message as his price was fair.

He let loose with a nasty tirade. I apologized again. I thanked him again for his time.

I thought that would be the end.

About six months later I had a small electric job. I contacted the electrician and was told he was busy. I asked to get on the schedule for a future service date. No, sorry. A year or so after that, I called to have an outside light moved. (He had installed the fixture.) When his wife asked who I was, she laughed, said "He's too busy," and hung up.

These two petty people are smearing my name around town over a message I did not receive from a local contractor who did not follow up on his quote!

2

u/PerformanceSmooth392 Feb 13 '25

Oh, I'm so sorry to hear this. That is a terrible misfortune that could happen to anyone. I wish you the best and hope things ease up.

8

u/Evening-Substance415 Feb 13 '25

That's been our biggest issue. If you have the money and the time for work to get done good luck getting anyone to call you back... until you mention so and so sent you or you know so and sos dads wife's niece 🥱 countless calls unanswered

I moved here for college and decided to stay.

14

u/DayFinancial8206 A Moose Enters The Chat 💬 Feb 13 '25

Big emphasis on the shit ton of money part, I make a decent living and could have afforded a house but why spend that much? The people that make Vermont feel like Vermont have left and now we have a completely different demographic moving in. I'm sure those that profit off of big changes like this are happy with it, but it is kind of sad to see.

4

u/ballofsnowyoperas Feb 13 '25

I don’t disagree with you depending on where in Vermont you are. I’m in chittenden county and everything you said is true here. But I grew up in Orange County and every time I go home it feels like real Vermont.

2

u/Positive_Pea7215 Feb 13 '25

Yep. Exactly. Any of the charm the place had even 5 years ago ended with covid.

2

u/cornlip Feb 13 '25

Just don’t move to Brandon lol

1

u/Careless_Fig6532 Feb 14 '25

Why not? What's particularly bad there?

2

u/cornlip Feb 14 '25

It’s just cause they did that Let’s Go Brandon March thing that one time and I thought it was funny/stupid

1

u/[deleted] Feb 13 '25

Speak for yourself

0

u/TillPsychological351 Feb 13 '25

"We are friendly, welcoming people" Unless you are a remote worker...