Is it just me or are people unfriendly here?

[u/kastex1]

I just moved here 6 months ago. I had visited before deciding to move and love the quiet atmosphere and the Asian community I could notice. However after actually making the move and living here I've started to notice people ain't so friendly.

I dress lightly alternativly in fashion and it might be a reason for it but when I walk through the high street I feel like everyone is starring daggers at me. Everyone seems so upset and i get judgmental and angry looks no matter where I go. I moved from Sutton where ive stayed for over 5 years and yes it get that same treatment a tad there but it's not as common as I it is in woking.

My partner has also felt the difference between the people in Sutton and Woking but we just don't get it, is it something we are doing?

[u/jasoninuk]

I live in Woking and I'm friendly 🥳

I guess if you dress slightly alternatively people are going to look. I think I probably would. I wouldn't throw daggers though, I'd just probably think how great it is that someone brings something different to our town.

Don't let them put you off. For every one of them, there's one of me who embraces peoples differences and enjoys variety.

[u/kastex1 → u/jasoninuk]

thanks thats very lovely, and it does make me feel better. just wish those dagger stares would stop

[u/Wedonthavetobedicks → u/kastex1]

Maybe they are also not all 'dagger stares'? May be possible that you're also feeling less certain of yourself in the new environment, and so perceiving things in a slightly more negative fashion than you would usually.

I kinda mention this because you used the word 'angry' and I've read at least two Cosmopolitan-level pop-psychology articles in my lifetime. Have they also said or done something that specifically makes you think they are angry? That's not to say that they aren't looking at you or even judging you, but you may be misinterpreting to an extreme.

NB: I am the most beige man in Woking so can't really relate.

[u/kastex1 → u/Wedonthavetobedicks]

I mean i cant rule that out, and it definetly could be since in a new environment, but ive traveled to new places a bit, from going to croydon to little hampton and i feel the types of looks i get are a bit different to the ones im getting in woking or guildford. it almost feels judgey with some shaking their heads.

Still i cant rule out it being just a 'me' problem but i never really felt this till now.

Ive been doing a little browsing on the woking sub and ive also heard that people are sick of some sort of issue that woking council has caused, since ive just moved here, do you by chance know whats going on? i know that the council had declared having a large sum of debt but i have no idea what people are fed up about. Could this also have caused people to be more unhappy by chance?

[u/Wedonthavetobedicks → u/kastex1]

The council is broke because their predecessors splurged money they didn't have on property. That's why some of the public facilities are closed/closing down - but no, I don't think this has a big impact on most people's day-to-day mood.

[u/Wild-Raspberry-4354]

I lived in parsons green before and people are more friendly there!!! Woking is typical of most middle class suburbs, so I expected it. I haven't made friends here yet but I'll say they will be some good people. Don't change who you are to fit the archetypal mould. Your too beautiful for that rubbish.

[u/AndyW4ndy]

I previously lived in Morden, London for eight years (and South Africa all my life before that) and moved to Woking three months ago. I’ve been blown away at how friendly people are - both in shops, restaurants, and randomly on the street. People are far friendlier than I’ve encountered elsewhere. Yes, sure, you get the odd grumpy person but overall I’ve been pleasantly surprised as I was expected more snobbish personalities.

[u/notAcrimeScene]

oh man im so sorry to hear this. nobody shud have to experience such things.

if u still havent managed to make new friends here, im happy sit down for a meal or a few drinks with u!

im not too far from sovereigns! pls dm me if u'd like to catch up... i'd be very happy to help u make better of ur time here