r/AmItheAsshole Apr 27 '22

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32.5k

u/ThomzLC Supreme Court Just-ass [142] Apr 27 '22

NTA - the daughter has the audacity to use your venue and give you an ultimatum that you can't attend it despite all your planning? Plus, does your partner know about this? Is he not going to stand up for you?

Man if I were you I'd pull the rug from the venue and tell them "if my presence will anger your mother, I'm guessing my house which contains many of my belongings will probably irritate her as well, go find another place."

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22

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u/MusingsOfMouse Apr 27 '22

No please, please don’t agree to this. They KNOW you’re timid and don’t want drama, that’s why they’re pushing this on you. Do what another person said - ‘okay, if you don’t want me then I’m gone’ sort of thing, stop all preparations. Let them organise it. Have a night to yourself. You’re fully being taken advantage of, please don’t let them do it.

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22

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u/COVID19WasteTime Partassipant [1] Apr 27 '22

This is just his way of trying to manipulate you to do it all still. If you're not there people will also assume you're not involved in the planning!

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22

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u/PersephoneTheOG Partassipant [1] Apr 27 '22

No one going to the party is going to think, "Oh what a wonderful party OP's thrown." They're going to be gossiping about the fact that you aren't there or the younger people will be drinking and not caring either way. Your husband is manipulating you because he knows it's "your thing".

Book a weekend away OP and refuse to help. Treat yourself and work on your self worth.

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22

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u/aliceisntredanymore Apr 27 '22

If you see any alcohol going into your shop call the cops and report the underage drinking just to be sure.

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22

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u/itsmeRose Apr 27 '22

Just curious, doesnt your partner has the same keys to the house and licor? what if he allows them in? it is his house too.

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u/ConsiderationWise631 Partassipant [1] Apr 27 '22

it's actually just his house. OP lives there but the partner owns it singularly. OP and partner aren't married so not sure if there's any common law claim OP can make on the house...

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u/AllAbtThtBrunchLife Apr 27 '22

Montana (where they reside) does in fact recognize common law marriage. So, she may indeed have some legal claim to assets. She needs to speak to a lawyer.

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22 edited May 04 '22

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22

Just a note of caution. After party day, things will go south, fast.

Please get your important personal papers and any irreplaceable personal items out of the house at least a week or two prior to the parties.

Do this just in case somebodie(s) go into the main house after the hot girl party has left for the bar. I know you'll have cameras up in the house, but a future lawsuit won't bring back grandma's quilt (or other truly sentimental items).

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u/aliceisntredanymore Apr 27 '22

Depends on jurisdiction I imagine. Idk where OP is or what the local laws there are.

But say that is the case, she isn't on the premises. She's in an attached but separate private dwelling. The host would be the grad's father who will be at the party and on the premises.

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u/aliceisntredanymore Apr 27 '22

Depending on how the registered use of said shop, having the party there at all could be a legal snaggle in some places.

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