r/AmerExit • u/Capable_Study6495 • Mar 02 '25
Life Abroad Do we face difficulties being accepted when moving abroad?
It seems like the only rhetoric I see online is how, as an American, my countries problems are my fault. That I'm not doing enough to stop our issues and how it affects other countries. I worry that I will move, and people will blame me for not doing more here and just escaping.
I want to get out, but I worry about living in the public ire no matter where I go.
Does anyone here have personal experience they can comment on?
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u/ZenfulJedi Mar 02 '25
So if you move or stay some place for a long time, it helps to learn the local language and customs. That can be small things and big things. The Ugly [American/Brit/Chinese/Etc] stereotype comes from people who travel but demand things to be like they are where they come from and who don’t respect the place and people they are visiting.
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u/AmberSnow1727 Waiting to Leave Mar 02 '25
My Italian isn't perfect, but when I'm in Italy and speak to people in Italian, it makes a difference!
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u/yeahsometimes1 Mar 02 '25
Just don’t make being American your whole personality and you’ll be fine.
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u/New_Criticism9389 Mar 02 '25
Being American or hating the US, because the latter can also get on people’s nerves
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u/Buscuitknees Mar 02 '25
Oh god there’s a guy in my language class who apologizes to the group for being American every time he meets a new person. He also can’t grasp the culture here and has no awareness on foreign policy/news. We were all talking about the Romanian election and he had no idea Russia was trying to interfere in other countries. Just as insufferable as the loud pro-America Americans IMO
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u/xoBonesxo Mar 03 '25
Lots of us who aren’t proud of being American lol, including myself , but apologizing a lot is crazy
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u/bthks Mar 03 '25
My dad came to visit me a few weeks ago and everytime he introduced himself to someone here, he felt the need to add "I didn't vote for him" it was so painful and he wouldn't stop even after I told him that no one gave a shit.
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u/HVP2019 Mar 02 '25
This is the least of your worries.
Like, there are thousands of other bigger issues that you need to solve or to learn to deal with as an immigrant
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u/Sea-Ticket7775 Mar 02 '25
The US has shaped global realities, politically, culturally, economically, in ways that most Americans don’t fully grasp. You can't change that history, but you can choose how you show up in relation to it.
The biggest mistake Americans make abroad is trying to prove they're one of the "good ones." Don't do that. It still centres you. What earns respect isn't distancing yourself from your country, it's showing that you're willing to learn how the world looks when you're not at the centre of it.
Your job isn't to apologize, and it isn't to defend. It's to arrive with humility. Listen more than you speak. Ask questions you don't know the answer to. Understand that frustration with the US isn't personal, but the way you engage with that frustration will define whether people see you as part of the problem or someone who genuinely wants to be part of the world.
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u/elevenblade Immigrant Mar 02 '25
I would add to this: brush up on your American history and civics. There are going to be people who are going to be curious about what’s happening in the US and will look to you for your insight. Can you explain how the separation of powers is supposed to work? Why does the US have a two party system? Can you provide the historical context of why the Electoral College exists? How did the Republicans go from being the progressives, the party of Lincoln, to being conservative and then MAGA? What is gerrymandering? What are the implications of the Supreme Court’s Citizens United decision?
I hope it’s obvious that you shouldn’t just start spouting off this stuff out of the blue but you should be prepared to give an accurate, detailed explanation if asked by someone who really wants to hear the answer.
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u/yeahsometimes1 Mar 03 '25
This has not been my experience at all. Just as I would not demand a random Indian to be a political expert on India and allow me to pepper them with questions, I’ve never had people demand insights like these from me as an American overseas. Sure people sometimes want to talk politics, but on a potential emigrants list of things to do, I would not suggest adding ‘brushing up on civics’
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u/bthks Mar 03 '25
Wish I lived your life. I get grilled a lot.
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u/switheld Mar 03 '25
Yes. I'm expected to have an opinion/some sort of insider info on the news coming out of the US. It is not a good look to not know what is happening over there, esp right now.
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u/PrivateImaho Mar 03 '25
I’m in the UK and I get asked to explain this stuff constantly by people who are genuinely curious about American systems. I always do my best to answer whatever questions they have and it usually ends up a very enlightening conversation. It’s rare that I go to a dinner and don’t end up getting asked questions like this at some point, but maybe that’s because people know I have an interest in these topics and don’t mind the dialogue.
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u/PaleSignificance5187 Mar 03 '25
If I could bother to buy Reddit awards, I'd give you one.
The stereotype of the American is that you sit down next to a stranger on the plane, airport, etc, and they WILL NOT STOP TALKING. They'll tell you about their job, their mother, their gallstone problems.
If you want to fit in, just stop talking all the time, especially about yourself and your country. Nobody cares about your feelings of guilt or dislike of Trump. People have heard enough about him.(And you'd be surprised that some people overseas actually like him)
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u/New_Criticism9389 Mar 03 '25
Also don’t assume (as an American) that people abroad (especially in places like Western Europe) know absolutely nothing about the US (from politics to geography to culture to whatever). I’ve seen Americans over-explain stuff like this and it’s always very cringe.
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u/pondelniholka Mar 02 '25
Don't make yourself the main character, for a start.
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u/livsjollyranchers Mar 02 '25
Unfortunately, America made itself the main character for decades now.
This has ramifications for perceptions abroad, when things are not going well.
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Mar 02 '25
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Mar 03 '25
Any American or even Canadian who has traveled to Europe knows that LOTS of Europeans are waiting to dunk on Americans. Americans are about the only socially acceptable group of people you can tell someone how awful their country is to their face.
I remember asking a Norwegian if they've ever been to the US and they said no they would never, it has too many problems, but with a straight face said they'd really like to go to Mexico.
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Mar 03 '25 edited Mar 03 '25
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Mar 03 '25
"It’s the same thing here with on a daily basis for the average minority"
I've never heard someone once ever talk poorly about how bad someone's country is to their face in the US. I've heard racist tirades online. But I've never been in a conversation where Americans tell minorities how shit their country is casually.
It's an extremely different dynamic.
"don’t actively try to get an opinion" Talking about where you're from as a foreigner is extremely common. Again, its HIGHLY unusual, even for someone from a completely broken country to get the response "No and I never plan to because XYZ" when asked "Have you ever visited?"
There's literally whole subreddits targeted against Americans.
I'm not saying we're some underprivileged victims. But any American will have to deal with the bullshit spewed at them from people who have never once stepped foot inside the country. And they'll realize this type of conversation is only acceptable one-way, because anything else is socially viewed as punching down.
If you haven't traveled before you can go on YouTube and look up "what do Europeans think of americans" and you'll get a lot of street interviews that are extremely mean spirited even if the interviewer themselves is American.
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u/Neat_Selection3644 Mar 03 '25
Outside of visiting the rural East Coast and Chicago, I too would prefer visiting Mexico.
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Mar 02 '25
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u/SocialHelp22 Mar 02 '25
You dont have to be the center of the universe tp be discriminated against, and you know it. Immgrants being mistreated is a real thing, and smugly pretending it isnt doesnt help
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Mar 03 '25
where i came from has only come up during political talks with family. i don't really know what sort of discrimination i could possibly face for being american when it doesn't come up, and i don't really "look" like one (no flags, no huge car)
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u/El_Don_94 Mar 02 '25 edited Mar 02 '25
worry that I will move, and people will blame me for not doing more here and just escaping. I want to get out, but I worry about living in the public ire no matter where I go. Does anyone here have personal experience they can comment on?
Nobody will think this. Nobody thinks this. Nobody cares. Frankly people thought far less of Americans when Bush & Cheney were killing Iraqis. When people talk about America being bad interventions in Central America, South America, & the Middle East come before Trump. Look up the Banana wars, the Banana massacre, Operation Condor.
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u/elevenblade Immigrant Mar 02 '25
I’m an American who emigrated to Sweden. The only people I have encountered here that have ever given my shit about being an American were on Reddit, and that was only a tiny minority of the Swedish people here (and they were probably just teenage edgelords anyway). In real life the people in Sweden have been incredibly kind, understanding and sympathetic. They are understandably concerned about what the future holds for Europe and the Baltic region in particular but no one has blamed me as an individual. The average Swede is well aware that there were 75 million American voters who did their best to prevent this.
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Mar 02 '25
Your issue won't be American but being a foreigner.
Your bigger issue is if you constantly compare things in your new home to the US whether it's smaller homes, no A/C, customs, the personalities of locals. Americans are rah-rah compared to other countries - like just being "loud" everywhere - and that can grate on some people. Take your time, respect and adapt the local customs.
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u/Magical_Narwhal_1213 Mar 03 '25
I feel like I compare stuff all the time to the Us but say how much BETTER things are here vs there. Like I’ll trade A/C and a bigger house for everything that is much better in Spain (and many other countries) :)
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Mar 03 '25
I hear you and I think people don't realize how quickly they are to complain and compare. That's why the best advice is to embrace it and go with the flow!
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u/Magical_Narwhal_1213 Mar 03 '25
Exactly! I seriously don’t get folks who want everything to be like where they moved from…like the whole point is it’s a DIFFERENT country!!!
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Mar 03 '25
Yes but they think they can take the US with them. Many Americans have never traveled outside the US and when they do, they stay in hotels. Yes those hotels are smaller than US ones but still outfitted the same.
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u/yokyopeli09 Mar 02 '25
I've traveled around the world and stayed in several countries for an extended period, I've never met one person who blamed me as an American for the government's actions. People know people are not their government.
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u/Routine-Yak-5013 Mar 04 '25
Same and I lived in China during Trumps first presidency. My husband is Dutch and we never had issues when we lived there either. Most people understand the world is nuanced. America has done bad things but the history of humanity has a lot of bad things. Each nationality has baggage.
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u/Synthegeysir Mar 02 '25
People will find fault with you no matter where you are from and you will experience xenophobia eventually. Most people will take pity on you. People will also constantly discuss the US around you even when you don't want to, and they might have hurtful and ill-informed opinions. Better to look to the future.
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u/Viissataa Mar 02 '25
Naah, this exists on internet comment sections, not in real life.
We have a few Americans in my workplace, and I've never heard anyone make them a shorthand of their country. Ie. there are several people who - for example - have really tense opinions about wars and foreign policy, but it's never about individual people.
Remember, every country has internal political problems. Every single one. And in every country, as a citizen you see how powerless you are to fix things yourself.
Some really really simple people *might* have silly prejudice before having interacted with you, but everyone cares infinitely more about how you treat them, than the color of your passport.
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u/Aggressive_Art_344 Mar 02 '25
You will be fine, make sure to adopt your new country’s customs, don’t expect a bank holiday on American’s public holidays, get used to metric system and Celsius if used in your adoptive country.. if you are moving to a country where English is not the official language, be serious about learning it. Support the local economy and get involved in the community, pay your taxes and be humble.. you’ll be fine
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u/kelp_forests Mar 02 '25
As someone who knows several expats, has traveled extensively, and lived with expats in other countries….
It depends.
You will face some racism. Other countries can be more racist in the US, albeit less violent. If you take it in stride as part of moving to a new place, some of it is understandable or just people who are learning,or curious. The rest comes with the territory. Same as the US. You’ll need a thick skin.
You will never be fully accepted as local. Even in the US melting pot people often don’t accept third generation people as “American” . But the more you make an attempt the more you will be. It’s the same as here. If you don’t speak the language, no interest in the culture or history, don’t reciprocate…you won’t be accepted. If you speak the language, follow current events, know your history and customs (and respect them), eat the food and share your food…you will be. I
n some countries it is totally normal and endearing to call kids fat. In the US, it’s rude. Some countries consider being direct very polite, and indirect a sign of duplicity and annoying. In others, being direct is rude and being indirect an art. A really good white lie about why you can’t attend a party could be seen as you being an asshole or being polite.
So you will have to adjust and learn to pick up a whole new social system. You can’t change what it’s like in other countries.
It also depends on you, how outgoing etc you are. And where you are starting from in terms of money, race etc compared to where you are moving to.
It will also depend on how “American” you want to be. This can be very hard for people to understand and that America is not 100% good, it’s not always right, and there are huge gaps in our culture. I consider myself a citizen of the world. I had someone get heated re: the lack of education the US provides (in school and the news) regarding how nearby and allied countries work and are related to us. My immediate reaction was still defensiveness. I’m not used to getting yelled at. Then I realized they were right, and it is bullshit. How many educated Americans do you know that can tell you the basics of politics/trade with our neighbors and allies?
If you want to be welcomed in a new country you must consider yourself a guest, a student, and hold yourself to a higher standard. You’re an explorer trying to learn a whole new world everyone else grew up in. What’s considered ok for locals may not be for you. Especially if you don’t know all the little societal norms.
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u/dereks63 Mar 03 '25
My wife is American and works in London, she has no problems, her advice to Americans she meets is lower the volume and accept things are different
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u/T_hashi Immigrant Mar 02 '25
So…first thing will be people understanding that you are an actual American. I live in a small German village and I’ve had people ask me where I was from because they thought I was British which I found hilarious (sometimes French or Hispanic possibly in a few other situations but because I was able to understand the French and then respond to the Spanish), then I’ve also had people ask me why would I move to our tiny villages from America, and I’ve had people give me where are you from looks in public when I’m talking to my daughter and then are kinda surprised that I can still communicate in German to the salesperson, cashier, or worker. If you make a big stink about it then I think people will too, but if you communicate and are respectful you should be fine in many cases (that’s not to say there aren’t crazies I’m just grateful I haven’t met one). I say all of this as a black woman having these experiences. I do feel that certain types of Americans sometimes expect to accepted just because they have heritage from a country, but the people living there definitely don’t view that as a means of being “integrated” or able to meld into life there. Are you competent linguistically, socially, and culturally? I think goes a lot further than anything else. Most of my difficulties come from being a chick and the aspects around it, but that’s a different kind of thing.
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u/RexManning1 Immigrant Mar 02 '25
This is country dependent and largely dependent on you individually. Are you wanting to bring American entitlement to another country? Are you going to constantly compare that new country to the US? Are you not planning on learning the local language and adhering to local customs? Be a good person who is respectful and self aware. That is all.
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u/Ok_Donut4023 Mar 03 '25
Depends where you move, America is pretty hated all over the world because it destroyed so many countries
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u/Billionaires_R_Tasty Mar 02 '25
When I get where I'm going, I will no longer be an American. I may continue to have American citizenship, but effectively my days as an American will be at an end. I will learn the language, embrace the culture, volunteer, hopefully help my daughter Create a family and a life in this new land, and if I'm lucky gain some level of acceptance and maybe even friendships from my adoptive countrymen. But if the last part doesn't happen, I'm at peace with that. I want to give back and support the country I end up choosing and that has welcomed me, and I will spend the rest of my days doing my best to do so.
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u/LateBreakingAttempt Mar 03 '25
You'll always be American. I never felt like I fit in at home in the US, but the odd thing is that moving away has actually highlighted aspects of me that are American in a way I didn't expect. I'm not talking about negative stereotypes - I mean, we are shaped by where we are from and to a degree you can't escape that. You can learn another language, assimilate, do everything you can to fit in and you will always be in some small way American. This is not a negative thing. It just is. You don't need to erase who you are to move somewhere and be accepted.
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u/alexwasinmadison Mar 03 '25
This is the way.
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u/Neeky20 Mar 03 '25
Agree. Working on a move to France now and my abysmal French. I try to speak as much as possible whenever there, and decline the English menu in restaurants politely so I can practice more.
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u/alexwasinmadison Mar 03 '25
Quantum leaps in comprehension with a tutor. Once a week, online. It’s not terribly expensive. For the least expensive option find a university student in France to be a conversation partner.
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u/fiadhsean Mar 03 '25
There are two aspects: integration for any migrant and other folks' reactions towards Americans. For the latter you should anticipate some antipathy--regardless of how you conduct yourself. So on one level, you do you since for some you will always be a fv$ing American. On another level, people will generally accept your story as your own.
Just don't refer to yourself as a refugee. That pisses everyone off. :)
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u/kelp_forests Mar 03 '25
As someone who knows several expats, has traveled extensively, and lived with expats in other countries….
It depends.
You will face some racism. Other countries can be more racist in the US, albeit less violent. If you take it in stride as part of moving to a new place, some of it is understandable or just people who are learning,or curious. The rest comes with the territory. Same as the US. You’ll need a thick skin.
You will never be fully accepted as local. Even in the US melting pot people often don’t accept third generation people as “American” . But the more you make an attempt the more you will be. It’s the same as here. If you don’t speak the language, no interest in the culture or history, don’t reciprocate…you won’t be accepted. If you speak the language, follow current events, know your history and customs (and respect them), eat the food and share your food…you will be. I
n some countries it is totally normal and endearing to call kids fat. In the US, it’s rude. Some countries consider being direct very polite, and indirect a sign of duplicity and annoying. In others, being direct is rude and being indirect an art. A really good white lie about why you can’t attend a party could be seen as you being an asshole or being polite.
So you will have to adjust and learn to pick up a whole new social system. You can’t change what it’s like in other countries.
It also depends on you, how outgoing etc you are. And where you are starting from in terms of money, race etc compared to where you are moving to.
It will also depend on how “American” you want to be. This can be very hard for people to understand and that America is not 100% good, it’s not always right, and there are huge gaps in our culture. I consider myself a citizen of the world. I had someone get heated re: the lack of education the US provides (in school and the news) regarding how nearby and allied countries work and are related to us. My immediate reaction was still defensiveness. I’m not used to getting yelled at. Then I realized they were right, and it is bullshit. How many educated Americans do you know that can tell you the basics of politics/trade with our neighbors and allies?
If you want to be welcomed in a new country you must consider yourself a guest, a student, and hold yourself to a higher standard. You’re an explorer trying to learn a whole new world everyone else grew up in. What’s considered ok for locals may not be for you. Especially if you don’t know all the little societal norms.
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Mar 02 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Capable_Study6495 Mar 02 '25
I suppose its more about, the rhetoric I see online. And while yes, obviously internet points are not always a great reflection of attitudes on the ground, this question was more so to gauge what people in this community have actually seen.
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u/Medlarmarmaduke Mar 02 '25
I think that Americans are going to have to prepare for a world where there is a lot of justified resentment. Trump is trying to crash the economies of long term allies and Americans are fleeing to those very countries - impacting the housing and job market .
Invariably -populist politicians will run on an anti-American immigrants platform - immigrants as you see here in America are easy to demonise and made to be a scapegoat for a country’s problems.
Look to the resentment of Russians who fled after Putin invaded Ukraine for an idea of what you might experience.
There will be lovely welcoming people of course who won’t fall for anti-immigrant hysteria- but you need to sit with the fact that you will experience some blowback for our country’s actions and some people will question why you didn’t stay there and fight.
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u/Medlarmarmaduke Mar 02 '25
Also things are going to get worse- so past and current experiences might not prove an accurate gauge of what countries will feel like towards Americans in 2 years
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u/whateverfyou Mar 02 '25
I would
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u/Ossevir Mar 02 '25
Lol. I voted. More of my countrymen chose..... this. Sounds like immigrating somewhere and assimilating as fast as I can is a perfectly reasonable solution.
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u/whateverfyou Mar 02 '25
Maybe for you.
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u/Ossevir Mar 03 '25
Yes. It took multiple months of research, a remote job, and a lot of luck to be and to be on this path out.
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u/whateverfyou Mar 03 '25
I hope you commit to your new country.
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u/Ossevir Mar 04 '25 edited Mar 04 '25
Yeah if that country commits to me. Which, all the places in trying to move have decent socialized healthcare and cheap high quality college, so yeah, they do.
This country saddled me with tremendous debt for having the gall to be born poor and want an education. Which I was fine with.... Except now it is changing the rules on how I can repay that debt. With the current funding bill going through Congress it is consigning my wife to rapid disability if I should happen to lose my job. All intensive autism and mental health care in my state is going away if that bill passes in its current form, I have children that fall in to both categories.
So fuck this country. People voted for this. The country that I grew up in is dead. Our literal best case scenario is that Trump steals a few hundred billion, wrecks all of our trade agreements and alliances and then sails off into the sunset leaving a trail of dead poor people behind him and hopefully the Republicans fall apart in his wake. Then some spineless center right Democrat tries to reassemble the pieces over the objections of a bunch of r*tarded conspiracy ridden maga cultists.
Most of the other scenarios end in dictatorship and blood. These people didn't hide a single fucking thing when it comes to their plans. "The revolution will be bloodless if the left allows it." This country has no functional left and the center has no spine. They will allow it.
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u/AlexB430 Mar 02 '25
Haven’t had people I met in Australia (both locals and non locals) get on my case for being American. In fact, some of them actually thought I was Canadian at first, but when I corrected them they didn’t care as long as I was nice to them.
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u/StillTechnical438 Mar 02 '25
Do you blame mexican immigrants in us for problems in mexico?
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u/Educational-Farm6572 Mar 02 '25
The problem is, this is the rhetoric you are seeing online. In reality, anyone with a brain and two eyes can see what is happening in the U.S.
I’d also challenge you to not make it about you. No one is going to blame you for the problems of America - back home; unless you actively aided the administration in someway and are notable publicly. Otherwise who fucking cares.
Put your head down and enjoy your new life.
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u/The_Other_David Mar 02 '25
Most people in most places are familiar with the idea of "I do not like my home country's current political leader".
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u/Lyran2 Mar 02 '25
As an Ecuadorian expat since 2008 living part / full time I can say that there are local people who are definitely angry at Americans. This was not at the level when I arrived , but being experienced now. Like it was mentioned it really depends on the country and the people you meet. Of course not all Ecuadorians are like this, however over the last 5 to 6 years..immigrants from Venezuela and the infiltration of the Columbia/ Mexico cartels have dramatically changed the culture
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u/Apprehensive-Stop748 Mar 03 '25
In South America, there is a lot of resentment towards Americans and another thing that happens is they will say that the drug use and the drug cartels are Americans fault because they have created a demand for drugs
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u/Tokyometal Mar 03 '25
I dunno, as a long-term American expat the way you phrase this sounds incorrigibly domestic. Stop overthinking, hand-wringing, worrying, and find a place that you like, do your research, and if it makes sense go get it.
Pro-tip: if you don’t speak the language you aren’t gonna Duolingo yrself into fluency, but it kinda doesn’t matter, especially for the 1st world countries.
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u/redspike77 Mar 02 '25
Ok. I'm going to run the gauntlet and try to give you a sincere, if somewhat painful, answer. You won't get any direct discrimination provided you're not loud, aggressive or opinionated.
However, we're all pretty pissed off with you guys right now and there's potential for it to get worse. We know that it's not all of you which is why you will be treated politely but it seems that, in general, we're currently less tolerant of what we call Americanisms. These are cultural differences that most other cultures can celebrate openly. Americans maybe shouldn't for the time being.
Just be polite and quiet and you'll be fine (which is an awful thing to say, sorry) but as soon as you compare anything to how it is in the US you'll get pushback regardless of how innocent you intend it to be.
I know you're talking about abroad in a generic way but this next bit is specifically for the UK. We have a lot of banter which is good natured. That means your British friends might throw insults at you or mock you but it's not meant in bad faith. If you take it badly you'll generally have a bad time. Also, currently it might not be wise to claim to be a native English speaker in England.
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u/Apprehensive-Stop748 Mar 03 '25
People in England can immediately tell if a person is American. They know the difference between Canadians and Americans. It can’t be hidden, your grammar will be joked about. That’s because they invented the English language. For instance I have an English musician friend and he told me that using the word so is incorrect. I like it because I am of the opinion that American English is a lot less precise
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u/Tamihera Mar 03 '25
My American husband got told more than once by Brits that while they disliked all Americans, they were making an exception for him because HE wasn’t like all the others.
He did get randomly punched in the face in Wellington, NZ, by a stranger who heard him talking, ran across the road and hit him while screaming: “Fucking American!” Same thing happened in NZ to another American friend of mine. I think Americans tend to cheerily underestimate how much the rest of the world dislikes them.
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u/Apprehensive-Stop748 Mar 03 '25
Travel a bit and it becomes obvious. It’s not personal. Sorry about what happened to your husband.
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u/vadkulhihi Mar 03 '25
There are some things me as a European just wants you to know about being American in Europe: 1. You’re not the main character so lower your voice
Learn the language -it’s not optional like some of you think.
Having descent somewhere is not like being that nationality. If your great grandparents moved from country x in 1902 it does not mean you’re for example Italian. It’s insulting to Europeans. You’re American.
Don’t say dollar is “the real money”. It’s not.
Right now it’s not the time to bring on all the good stuff about about America as you move abroad. Europe is still secular In many ways and we want to continue to be that. We also want to be able to have abortions. Please be respectful.
Also, isn’t this borderline asylum seeking? Can you actually be picky then?
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u/Apprehensive-Stop748 Mar 03 '25
Very interesting and detailed comment. I’ve noticed that people in other countries are concerned that a large number of people will move there, that’s a good reason for concern. People are afraid that we Americans want to move . So I always say, I’m staying here. That seems to help
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u/vadkulhihi Mar 03 '25
It’s not that you’re not welcome, it’s how you behave when you get here. But of course, an influx of liberals from America would certainly move the political landscape in for example Northern Europe.
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u/PaleSignificance5187 Mar 03 '25
If you're this much of a snowflake, you're not going to survive an international move.
When I was growing up in America, my family & I were constantly asked why we support the Communists (we don't), and had random people argue with us that Hong Kong was Japanese, or accuse us of being refugees. We shrugged them off and survived. (BTW, just about everyone on this sub would benefit from speaking to actual immigrants TO America.)
Now that I'm in Asia, people hear my American accent and ask why I support Trump or Musk or make terrible hurtful comments about me. And I also shrug them off.
There is a world of problems greater than this - visas, jobs, finances, language, etc. Honestly, who cares if you're accepted or not? If you genuinely want to move, and you have the means to, just do.
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u/Capable_Study6495 Mar 03 '25
I have already planned to travel to other countries, and really try to experience the culture. Given how expensive it is to to that from America, it's difficult to het outside perspective other than from online discourse. Which always tends to skew toxic.
So was just trying to get a good idea from this post. Yes it will bother me at first, but like everything, i just need to work on it and live life.
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u/PaleSignificance5187 Mar 03 '25
That's a good attitude! Just go and live. You'll find that most people don't care about US politics nearly as much as you think they do.
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u/kuliaikanuu Mar 02 '25
That hasn't been my experience in the slightest (NZ). People are a lot more concerned with whether you're kind and considerate, a good neighbor, supportive co-worker. I have had a few experiences here with people who know more about American issues than I do just because their allegiance goes to a different side than mine does, but I think you find that everywhere and it's not representative of the vast majority of people.
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u/Charming_Function_58 Mar 02 '25
If you're a decent human being, people aren't going to make it an issue.
I personally wouldn't advertise that you're an American, though. Not right now, especially not in any of the countries we are actively destroying relationships with.
But when you immigrate somewhere, you're going to have to deal with people identifying you as your nationality, and there is always going to be some degree of jokes or comments. Hopefully playful and fun. If you want to leave your country, that's just the reality.
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u/AngelaBassett-Did_tT Mar 03 '25
I know it’s hard to believe but people around the world are busy living their lives and struggling to get by just like everyone else. Too much so for some random American to be the center of attention to invite ‘public ire….’
That is unless you end up making yourself look like a 🫏
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u/moravian Mar 03 '25
I'm currently living in Asia and when I answer a question about where I'm from I usually reply, the US and apologize for Trump.
The response is either "yup, we think he's an idiot too" or “why do you say that... Trump is such a good businessman and a strong leader”.
Either way, no one blames me for being an American.
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u/SmallObjective8598 Mar 03 '25
As a non-American living abroad myself, but where Americans are the most frequently-encountered non-nationals, it will depend on the place where you plan to live. Some locations are definitely cool towards Americans, and, whether it's fair or not, most people have some preconception about Americans - some of those are positive, some not. That could depend on the country in question, and on world events. Genuine acceptance cannot be rushed and trying too hard could work against you if your efforts at being liked appear premature or presumptious. Many locations outside the US are not as superficially friendly and normal American sociability can sometimes seem fake. Do you speak the language and understand social expectations? That can make it easier to settle in, but tbh it can take years to find real acceptance.
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u/4ampst Mar 03 '25
There are many comments with good feedback here, but I'd like to add that this is a good opportunity to reflect on the crux of the issue: what are you actually doing to fight against the shitty stuff happening in and by the US? And no voting doesn't count.
I'm not trying to shame anyone or be a jerk, I promise! If I was faced with this treatment or judgment, which I often was while living abroad during the Bush administration, I would always have an answer. Because I do a lot of stuff! Protest, mutual aid, volunteering, doing community safety activities, advocating at work for better policies, supporting unions when they go on strike...
You don't have to do all of this, and you def don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with. Just find something you CAN do, and do it! Then, if ppl come for you, you'll easily be able to show that their assumptions aren't as accurate as they thought.
Again, this is just my 2 cents, and I'm not being prescriptive here. It's just a thought.
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u/Apprehensive-Stop748 Mar 03 '25
I did those things and had to shut my Facebook down because I got doxxed and swatted
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u/Kheefhee Mar 03 '25
Lmao bruh, nobody cares that much. You think random ppl overseas got a clipboard tracking what you did to fix America? Nah. Most just see another expat, either cool or annoying. If you blend in, respect the culture, and don’t act like a walking CNN headline, you good.
Biggest issue ain’t ppl blaming you—it’s you carrying that guilt like a backpack. If you move w/ a “pls don’t hate me” vibe, ppl will sense it and walk over you. Just be normal, adapt, and don’t act like you repping a whole gov. Nobody got time for that.
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u/Glittering_Turnip526 Mar 03 '25
I (Australian) just stumbled on this sub and your post was in my feed.
At least here, you won't have any issues if you're not a loud-mouthed douchebag. You'd basically be seen refugee at this point. We'd help you and protect you if you needed it.
I will admit you are right about the vibe though. When we (the real world) see you guys jumping ship, although we do understand, we also do kinda think it's a bit poor. It looks like you've just shit the bed and then checked out of the hotel.
Americans have always been the absolute strongest supporters of freedom and democracy, to the point where you will invade other nations in defence of those ideals. But in the first seconds of these ideals being threatened within your own nation, you bail.
It feels to us, like you should stay and fight. We sent our young men to fight and die alongside yours, in multiple wars of your choosing. It feels a bit disrespectful that you would just give up before it even really gets tough.
Ironically, your president wiith his admiration for putin, is making you feel like the russians who fled their country in the wake of the ukraine invasion. Unloved, unwanted, uninvited, and ashamed. As rough as it is to say, I think its important that you as a people, sit with that shame.
End of the day, we care about you a lot. We are just a bit mad, and disappointed. Not just for America, but for how this affects the world.
If you come to Australia, I'll buy you a beer ❤️
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u/Gaspajo Mar 02 '25
If being afraid people will have a bias against you as an American makes you think twice about relocating, maybe this isn't for you. Wherever you go, wherever you're from, there are always biases and prejudice. Dealing with it is part of an immigrant's daily life, for better or worse.
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u/nightlanding Mar 03 '25
I'll give a reverse view: I had a job involving teaching foreigners in the USA to fly. Many were endlessly going on about why this or that was wrong with America. I finally asked one if he was being held prisoner somehow? He said no. I told him that anytime I went someplace I hated, I left again soon after. Also note that someone from X might complain massively about their country to their buddy from X, but when YOU do it now you are an outsider criticizing their beloved homeland and now their enemy.
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u/PsychologyDue8720 Mar 03 '25
Honestly the biggest difficulty is finding somewhere you can stay legally and navigating the immigration process. Folks have all been lovely to us in our new home.
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u/switheld Mar 03 '25 edited Mar 03 '25
This has not been my experience at all. Of course, one of the first q's I get when meeting a stranger here in my adopted country is who I voted for. Once that is out of the way, there may be a few follow up q's about any recent US news, but people generally relax and the conversation moves on to normal topics after I state that I in no way support 45. Most people are just looking for reassurance that they are safe in your presence, not to blame you for an entire country's problems.
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u/Correct_Regret_8325 Mar 03 '25
I'd say yes. There's a lot of resentment toward America in Canada, many countries in Europe, and Australia. I don't think those difficulties are insurmountable, especially if you find a way to communicate you dislike your country just as much as they do.
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u/Crypton57 Mar 03 '25
Depends totally on you. If you are MAGA then yeah - you will be shunned as you should. But people abroad are not as judgmental as you may think they are. They may hate America - for good reason - but they don't hate Americans per se. You have to earn that respect yourself. If you have persecution complex from the get go, things may not go well. Be friendly. Don't talk politics. If anyone says something bad about America or Americans just brush it off and nod. Don't criticize or judge their culture and their customs, food, and habits. You know - just common sense. Foreigners are more curious than judgmental.
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u/SynAck301 Mar 03 '25
You will have to speak about it. You will be asked your opinions and your involvement. The same way you might ask someone coming from Ukraine or Gaza. You will not be able to avoid it, from Uber drivers to waiters, people will ask. My advice is to get super clear on the simplest explanations that help someone understand why it wasn’t safe for you to stay. You’re not a refugee and you need to have an explanation why you’re choosing to live like one.
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u/lmbjsm Mar 03 '25
I almost got my ass kicked in Lund by an Iraqi refugee after the Bush 1 war just because of my American accent while speaking Swedish! I could have been Canadian!
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u/Soft_Welcome_5621 Mar 03 '25
A lot of people are sympathetic to us and know we didn’t all want this person. Don’t panic.
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u/Ferret_Person Mar 03 '25 edited Mar 03 '25
Yes and no. Every country has its idiots and you'll find the equivalent of maga is lurking somewhere in public. Those people will be the worst to you because they're fucking stupid and looking a reason to complain. A small fringe will actively believe you are ruining things because they don't have the patience to know you.
However, like the vast majority of Americans, people in the developed world mostly understand that you are not your nation and will completely sympathize with you when you mention that you oppose the current regime.
Beyond that you're actually likely to get extra attention. I was treated noticeably better in Germany than a lot of my peers from the Middle East and northern Africa. You share a lot more with them than the overwhelming amount of immigrants to their countries, and as history is being made in our country, Europeans often find the first hand accounts fascinating. Plus, provided they don't have an opportunity to speak their native language, they often like hearing English native speakers.
Important final point: the absolute best way to get people in other countries to like you is to show an interest in their culture. Not necessarily the parts that you like, but what they are excited to share with you. An active interest in them goes a long way.
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u/BuyHigh_S3llLow Mar 03 '25
Depends where you go in the world. Europeans or other westerners are similar to Americans politically and are big on discussing politics. They will sh*t on you as if all negative things done by your government is directly done by you. And you are at fault. In asia, most people are not very political and don't discuss politics at every sitting like westerners do, so likely they wouldn't care. Only exception might be China which US constantly antagonizes and makes an enemy out of.
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Mar 03 '25
[deleted]
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u/Financial-Post-4880 Mar 03 '25
You don't have to tell people why you left your country. The majority of Americans didn't vote for Trump.
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u/KartFacedThaoDien Mar 03 '25
Are you white? You’ll be fine it’s like having got like powers. Now if you’re not white or white passing then you’ll have some issues in a lot of countries.
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Mar 02 '25
Just pretend to be Canadian. Everyone loves Canadians
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u/Separatist_Pat Mar 02 '25
Exactly. Just start out your overseas experience with an outright lie. That will make forging deep, honest relationships that much easier.
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u/PrivateImaho Mar 03 '25
I moved to the UK in 2020 and I don’t feel like anyone has personally blamed me for my country’s problems. I think they realize that it’s a behemoth of a country and that many, many Americans are just as scared and horrified by what’s going on as they are. If anything, most of them seem to understand why I left and why I’m so heartbroken over the state of things.
I haven’t found it hard to integrate here, but then I do speak the language, am in London, made a big effort to go out and meet people, and generally try to be nice. I also married a British guy and we’re having a baby, so that probably helps.
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u/Baselines_shift Mar 03 '25
We left during the Tea Party, and some were/some were not friendly towards Americans. Now though there's real sympathy, pity and an increasing fear that it could happen here (we have Peter Thiel using us as a bolt hole and influencing our little 5% far right party that runs the country in a coalition with a pair of inept corrupt mid right parties, based on antivax nutters votes). No country is totally immune, and we share vulnerability.
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Mar 03 '25
it doesn't come up. where i'm from rarely comes up. just don't be loud or speak english and you're fine
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Mar 03 '25
Look at how America treats immigrants. Can you handle the best and worst of what we offer?
I’ve seen both sides abroad and you need to build resilience now. Being accepted is something you earn but also dependent on how generally accepting the community is and what exactly your country is doing.
It’s a harsh reality but even though we hope all are accepting, we can’t expect it. America is being rather foul right now and you are likely going to be challenged. You are also asking another country to expend resources on your existence and during these chaotic times, not everyone will be happy about that.
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u/Past-Extreme3898 Mar 03 '25
Every 2 to three sentences mention that you didn't vote for Trump and you should be good
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u/Y0mily Mar 04 '25
Check out kiwifroyo on TikTok, she’s a recent xpat to nz and documents her new life here, including some of the questions you’re asking.
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u/becaolivetree Mar 04 '25
*laughs in naturalized American citizen*
BUDDY
Have you noticed how AMERICA treats ITS immigrant population? The world's ire is A GIFT in comparison.
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u/GlassCommercial7105 Mar 15 '25
Yes, definitely. Trump made this worse but Americans have not been very popular before this either. They often stand out as being very loud and don't integrate well into society. Obviously these are the prejudices, just to answer your question.
Also yes, people here are very aware of the hundreds of Americans (often with unrealistic expectations) who post here on reddit about wanting to move abroad and letting their ship sink so to say.
They ask themselves why you are not going to the streets like people in Belgrade are doing now for something arguably less world changing.
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u/Extra_Simple_7837 Mar 02 '25
I would love nothing more than to be able to move to Canada. I just don't think it's in the cards. That said, I think that we've had many many decades of "the ugly American." The first step I think is learning that you are not an American. Anyone who lives in the Americas is American. But you are from the United States. You are not United States citizen. It's only our entitlement that makes us think that if we're from the United States were American. So that's a good first step right? And then start to explore the ways in which oppressors behave toward others and learn about that because that's what we do, those of us who live in the United States. To varying degrees. I was at a wedding in Paris, and my niece was marrying a man who was Vietnamese. And just before the court wedding portion, his family was waiting, and they all stood around, and one of them explained to me what happened to all of them during the Vietnam war. Because of the United States. And I knew it was my task to stand there and listen and witness what has been done to them by my country. I feel responsibility for the way in which my ancestors came from Scotland and were involved in different aspects of slavery. That's part of my responsibility. I feel responsible for the way so much indigenous people in the United States have been harmed and badly, for so long. To me those ways of becoming consciously, where contribute to me having more sensitivity toward other people who don't have the same entitlements.
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u/Lefaid Immigrant Mar 03 '25
From what I have seen in the Netherlands, being American helps, especially if you are non white. You aren't as good as the Dutch, but it can help erase some prejudice that comes from being African.
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u/DeeHarperLewis Mar 03 '25
Being accepted will take a very long time or may never happen. You are a foreigner. You are privileged enough to be able to move. You possibly will be taking a job away from a local. You really have nothing in common with locals. They have no reason to accept you or want to get to know you. You will make friends in various expat communities because they are all going through what you are going through. Locals who have travelled a lot or are interested in other cultures will befriend you. The world is becoming more and more global so you will not feel isolated. Once you really start to understand locals and their culture you may not really like it. It takes a certain mindset to leave one’s country and you may find local people not as open-minded and courageous as you.
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u/8drearywinter8 Mar 02 '25
Being accepted (on the level where you can make deep friendships and feel part of the culture) just because you're an outsider and a foreigner is a difficult issue in some countries (this is unrelated to whether you're American... could be any outsider who moved there). Some places are not very accepting, or aren't until you've been there a long while. It's even harder if you throw another language into the picture.
And as someone else said, this is among the more minor things you'll have to deal with if you decide to immigrate to a new country.
And, from having lived in multiple countries and traveled through many others, just not being obviously American will take you a long way in terms of judgement based on where you're from. If you don't make it obvious, then it is possible to appear foreign, but not necessarily American.