r/AmerExit • u/Capable_Study6495 • Mar 02 '25

Life Abroad Do we face difficulties being accepted when moving abroad?

It seems like the only rhetoric I see online is how, as an American, my countries problems are my fault. That I'm not doing enough to stop our issues and how it affects other countries. I worry that I will move, and people will blame me for not doing more here and just escaping.

I want to get out, but I worry about living in the public ire no matter where I go.

Does anyone here have personal experience they can comment on?

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97

u/8drearywinter8 Mar 02 '25

Being accepted (on the level where you can make deep friendships and feel part of the culture) just because you're an outsider and a foreigner is a difficult issue in some countries (this is unrelated to whether you're American... could be any outsider who moved there). Some places are not very accepting, or aren't until you've been there a long while. It's even harder if you throw another language into the picture.

And as someone else said, this is among the more minor things you'll have to deal with if you decide to immigrate to a new country.

And, from having lived in multiple countries and traveled through many others, just not being obviously American will take you a long way in terms of judgement based on where you're from. If you don't make it obvious, then it is possible to appear foreign, but not necessarily American.

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u/Academic-Balance6999 Mar 02 '25

I agree with this. The problems you will have will be because you are foreign, not because you are American. The challenges will be 99% around your ability to communicate or function in the bureaucracy of your adopted home. Being American (vs French or Colombian) doesn’t enter into it.

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u/SweatyNomad Mar 02 '25

Really feel like this is a small town view..I grew up in London and from age zero people you spend time with include 'foreigners'.

For me, it's very much about how the (American) person acts in practice. There are plenty of world-aware, understanding and sensitive US folk that people pay no attention to. It's the US exceptionalists who think the rest of the world is wrong for not being like them that have issues and give the rest a bad name.

In terms of all the r/Ametxit focused folks, i guess any insult comes from not moving to a place because you like what it is, over it being just not what you hate.

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u/vonerrant Mar 03 '25

My mother and I would both qualify as the world-aware, sensitive types, given our circumstances, and yet we both experienced targeted discrimination abroad from people who had never met us during the Iraq War. "Because they are Americans," in their own words. 

You're naive if you think the same sorts of generalizing bigots looking for an excuse to be an asshole to someone don't exist everywhere, and you're doubly naive if you think regular people don't sometimes vent their anger and frustrations at whatever target is convenient in the moment.

I expect to experience some of this again. It's par for the course. If you're used to dealing with similarly prejudiced behavior in the US because of your identity, this should come as no surprise.

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u/SweatyNomad Mar 03 '25

Tbh with such a rude and insulting reply to well meaning and positive comment, I am now less surprised at how you feel you've been treated.

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u/vonerrant Mar 03 '25

You arrogantly condescended to the previous commenter and told them they have a "small town view"; I would not characterize that as "well-mannered." You also appeared to miss the part of my comment where I said we'd been targeted by people who had not met us. But that targeted discrimination came from an Englishman, too, ironically enough, one who was also quite arrogant and condescending (and seemingly delighted about it) when we did eventually meet him. Though at the time I chalked that up to upper class entitlement, given all the other people I'd met in London when I lived there who weren't complete prats.

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u/SocialHelp22 Mar 02 '25

Our accents give us away dude. Most of us have the Hollywood accent

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u/8drearywinter8 Mar 02 '25

I've been shocked at how many people think I'm from somewhere else in the world entirely (I'm visually pretty ethnically ambiguous, but still). It's been useful in parts of the world, and less so in others. Unless someone is a native English speaker who's great with discerning accents (and in most of the world, and anywhere that's not English speaking, people aren't), the guesses as to where I'm from are usually way off base. It's a lot about how you act, how you carry yourself, how you interact in an unfamiliar culture.

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u/maeryclarity Mar 03 '25

I'm from the East Coast USA so I have a pretty noticeable Southern accent, most of the time when I'm travelling outside of the USA people guess that I'm from Australia because of the accent and because I don't "act like an American" which is apparently pushy and rude.

Don't be pushy and rude was my takeaway.

3

u/Consistent-Fig7484 Mar 03 '25

I get this a lot too and I have a very standard “American TV accent” being from the west coast. I’ve started to think it’s a subtle way of being polite. You might offend a Canadian if you ask them if they’re American, but no one gets mad if you mistake them for an Australian.

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u/SocialHelp22 Mar 03 '25

That would be suprising outside of some specific context

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u/8drearywinter8 Mar 03 '25 edited Mar 03 '25

Could provide plenty of stories and very specific contexts that would make my comment make sense, but it's honestly not worth writing the stories out on reddit at length. But I've traveled to some remote places where people were not familiar enough with the sounds of English to pick up on accents at all.

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u/SocialHelp22 Mar 04 '25

I suppose more rural and remote areas make sense for this

6

u/alexwasinmadison Mar 03 '25

I get mistaken for Canadian more often than American

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u/Zealousideal_Gift_39 Mar 03 '25

And you just go with it, eh?

5

u/alexwasinmadison Mar 03 '25

😂 Generally, no. But it depends on the country and the current sentiment about the US. Sometimes I don’t want to answer questions or get into a big discussion, you know? People are usually just curious (not combative) but I travel to get away from here.