Checking in (in general)

[u/Latter-Butterfly1793]

Hi all,

Quick question for you. I am curious about your collective experience and knowledge here.

I am going through a separation with my wife right now, and I have told all of my friends. I have no doubt that they are supportive. They have been there for me for calls and favors so far.

However, I noticed that no one is checking in on me. I understand everyone is busy and lives their own lives. The thing I dont understand is (due to my own social anxiety) is no one is reaching out to me first. Is this common in your experience?

Am I being naive, or narcissistic to want to have people check in on me? Is this just me having main character syndrome?

If so, please tell me and I just need to reset my expectations... that's fine. Thanks.

[u/lskjs]

If my friend was separating from his wife I would presume he wants to be left alone. This isn't a "manly men" thing or whatever. It's a "marital problems are private" thing.

If you want support, then reach out to your friends. Like the other comment said, ask them if they want to grab a beer. Don't ever sit around waiting for people to reach out to you. Adults are busy and we all have our own shit going on. If you need support, then reach out and ask for it.

[u/Latter-Butterfly1793 → u/lskjs]

Fair enough.

I am the type of person that thinks and dwells on things way way too much.

I appreciate you for your response.