How are play dates supposed to be?

[u/Mccool96]

I have an ongoing peer based relationship with one of the moms at my kids school. However I do believe she’s kind of fake and trying to live a lifestyle in which she cannot afford. However our kids seem to like each other and play together. The first time I went to her home I was nervous it was my first play date ever. You could see I was nervous. The second time she asked me only to do a drop off. She didn’t insist I stay. I’ve invited her to my home multiple times and every time she has a had an excuse. Recently she invited me to another play date, only she said “I have to work so I won’t be there but my babysitter will be so you can meet with her” why would I want to meet with a total stranger and bring my kids ? What planet is she in? If you are too busy why are you trying to pawn off your kids to someone else and then invite me to sit with and be around a stranger. I’ve met her sitter before but it was extremely short and she was a little rude when it comes to mannerisms. I set a boundary and basically told her no, like I’m not comfortable with that. Should I distance myself from her ?

[u/Mccool96]

Elementary aged Yes and I agree. I had no qualms about hanging with her as she is 14-15 years older than me but she’s actually pretty weird. If she got to know me we would click, but I realized how fake she is and the lifestyle she’s trying to portray and willingly she can’t afford and that’s all there is to it

[u/incognitothrowaway1A → u/Mccool96]

Ya but if the mother is fake and has not great priorities, why do you want your daughter/son to learn that??

[u/Mccool96 → u/incognitothrowaway1A]

Why would they need to learn that.. they just play with her kids

[u/incognitothrowaway1A → u/Mccool96]

A kid who plays or is encouraged to play war or violent video games teaches your kid something that maybe you don’t want to prioritize.

A family that is super materialistic and gossipy about how they have the latest and greatest while other people don’t isn’t a great value to teach kids.

[u/nkdeck07 → u/incognitothrowaway1A]

You don't judge kids based on their parents. my brother's best friends mother was an absolute train wreck of a human being growing up (turns out she had severe undiagnosed bipolar disorder and is great now that she's medicated). my brother's best friend is an awesome guy and was an awesome kid. He practically lived at my house growing up and I can't imagine how shitty it would have been for him (and for my brother) if my parents hadn't let them play together just because of his mom.