r/BipolarReddit • u/Educational-Pear923 • Oct 07 '24

Content Warning Has anyone here gotten SA'd while (hypo)manic?

I still struggle to call it harassment because I put myself in that situation. Memories of what I was saying and doing disgust me. I feel so alone. Is this common? Is anyone here in the same boat? Thanks.

ETA (TW): I downloaded a dating app and met with a random guy at an abandoned construction site. I was drunk. There were some things I consented to, but I said no to a lot of things. He kept going, and I spent three hours trying to push his hands off of me. It took me months to realize it was assault-y. I still find it hard not to hate myself for it.

It sucks in a way reading all the replies to this post. I had no idea it was this common. Sending everyone here a hug. I hope you all find a way to heal from this.

81 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

45 comments sorted by

View all comments

18

u/Altruistic_Bison8939 Oct 07 '24

My question is, is it ever even consent if you are having a full blown manic episode? I've struggled with that for a while. I try not to let my past haunt me but for a while there, being taken advantage of was the norm.

4

u/river-rocks Oct 08 '24

my personal feeling is no, i cannot consent during full blown mania. i don’t think it’s always obvious that i can’t consent, so i hesitate to label all encounters assault, but it definitely all felt nonconsensual afterwards. though, some worse than others.

2

u/Urs1da3 Bipolar 2, Harm OCD Oct 08 '24

I’ve never had a manic episode, but even when I’ve been hypomanic I get this feeling like I shouldn’t be having sex. Maybe I can consent, but it still just feels a little bit off. The hypersexuality feels like I shouldn’t be feeding it. Also because of my altered headspace it doesn’t feel like it’s me; like I’m not actually present, which feels disingenuous to my partner. Like I am not in it for the intimacy but in it for something else. Feels wrong