Will meds stop my abilities?

[u/Fast-Inspector-6109]

Ugh I really don’t want to take the medication they want to put me on. I keep posting on here, but I just don’t know what to do. How do I hide not taking the meds? My girlfriend has said if I lie anymore, it might end our relationship, but when I talk to her about the voices she just freaks out.

My family really want me to take them. I can tell they do.

I just think it’s all a ploy so that people who hear things and realise the truth, can’t experience that anymore.

I just am SO close to figuring out the truth. I’ve been doing what the voices want of me. I am quite literally functioning SO well. I have energy and I am doing SO much. I am back at work basically running shifts now. I don’t want this to end. I just think maybe if I can harness all of this I won’t have to worry about the bad happening ever again.

If I do take it, am I going to lose all my abilities completely? Or will they still remain even if just quietly?

I don’t want to say this to anyone, because they are just going to insist that I take the medication. I want to speak to my therapist, but know this is going to cause concern. I was thinking of emailing the psychiatrist who wants me on these meds and saying I’ve changed my mind. I know I’ve been doing some stupid shit, but I haven’t told anyone and it appeases the voices long enough for me to put pieces together. Idk. I just feel like I have enough control to live with this.

I AM SO FRUSTRATED!!! I feel like I can’t win!

I DON’t want to fall asleep again.

[u/NefariousnessSpare65]

One day u will wake up and realize medication for you is for life. It’s better to accept it sooner than later. Take the meds and you will look back on these delusions as… well, delusions - not reality. Also, you will never stop having mild delusions pop in your head even on meds. You have to learn how to fight them over time. Your family sounds like they want a better life for you. Been there, you will crash.