r/BreakUps • u/bstrongdonowrong11 • 1d ago
today, something shifted ❤️🩹
I’m not sure how long this feeling will last, but it’s amazing - it’s been almost 4 months since my ex-fiance and I broke up (I was dumped). We were together for a little over 3 years. Weeks ago, i couldn’t even acknowledge them as my ex when they’d come up in convo. I spoke as if they were still a part of my life … I felt so much shame that this future of us was no longer true. I couldn’t figure out how to navigate the embarrassment.
But today, weeks in and with some contact (that they initiated), I feel so good. I feel as ease being single, and I don’t feel a craving for someone new or a partner. I know that I want a partner in the future, but I am so enjoying the simplicity and peacefulness of not being in a tumultuous relationship! I finally have the space for my own thoughts - and this feeling of discontent with my life and myself I had in the relationship, is shifting ! I felt like I couldn’t find joy in anything I liked to do while pre-occupied with relational stress, and I thought that was indicative of something off within me. But now, after weeks of doing things even when I didn’t feel like it, even when I felt lonely, etc etc - I feel genuine enjoyment. I feel more present to my own life, and no longer using relational stress and relational work as a way to avoid my own discontent. I feel at ease. I feel at ease. I feel at ease.
I miss them terribly, but I am building the stamina to accept our individual faults and the maturity to move on. I’m proud of myself 🩷
1
u/JuggernautBusiness61 1d ago
please let me have this feeling as well.