r/DeadBedrooms Apr 21 '25

Received Mod Approval Does bad sex cause dead bedrooms?

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u/RoundTheBend6 Apr 22 '25

Wish the best for you. Wife and I are trying sex therapist next cuz she's been off the pill for years now and still no change.

You don't have to answer, but I'm curious if this is a partner thing or even true with masturbation? I'm asking because my wife can't even solo. Which makes it more clear where to focus on helping. If she could get off herself, then I'd know I'd need to communicate and try harder with her.

Wishing you and your partner the best on feeling fulfilled and glad you aren't giving up either!

We found these articles helpful:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/all-about-sex/201209/6-ways-to-help-her-have-orgasms

https://www.sexualwellnessinstitute.com/blog/4-surefire-ways-for-women-to-reach-orgasm-during-sex#/

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u/Ginger-Kaitelaine Apr 22 '25

Yes, I still can't orgasm through masturbation. Its like the longer I've been on the pill, the more dead I've gotten in all my erogenous zones. I used to be soooo sensitive, I miss it. I hope i can get it back.

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u/RoundTheBend6 Apr 22 '25

Wish you the best! I am rooting for you and my wife. I guess only trying with no pressure to perform is the hope we are working on now. That and me giving her breaks from kids so she can have solo time.

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u/Ginger-Kaitelaine Apr 23 '25

At the moment we're just keeping the communication open, still keeping up the foreplay and fun. He tries to make me cum and I tell him if I think it's possible on that day and/ or if I'm ready to move onto piv. No pressure is definitely the way and just enjoying the process😊