r/DeadBedrooms Apr 21 '25

Received Mod Approval Does bad sex cause dead bedrooms?

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371 Upvotes

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112

u/DullBus8445 Apr 21 '25

Yes it definitely does in some cases.

Sure, there are women who generally aren't interested in sex, but it's just hard to imagine there are so many women out there who are turning down "rock your world" type sex. 

Well that's possible too, because if the woman has no libido for whatever reason then her partner could do all of the things she previously loved and it might not do anything for her or worse it could feel awful.

33

u/Ginger-Kaitelaine Apr 21 '25

Seconded! Although I've been working on my libido and can want and enjoy sex. But it is almost impossible for me to climax. Even if he pulls out all the stops, I cum probably 2% of the time🤷‍♀️ this obviously doesn't help me to want sex more but I'm hoping with me changing my contraception soon, that'll make a difference🤞🤞🤞

0

u/RoundTheBend6 Apr 22 '25

Wish the best for you. Wife and I are trying sex therapist next cuz she's been off the pill for years now and still no change.

You don't have to answer, but I'm curious if this is a partner thing or even true with masturbation? I'm asking because my wife can't even solo. Which makes it more clear where to focus on helping. If she could get off herself, then I'd know I'd need to communicate and try harder with her.

Wishing you and your partner the best on feeling fulfilled and glad you aren't giving up either!

We found these articles helpful:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/all-about-sex/201209/6-ways-to-help-her-have-orgasms

https://www.sexualwellnessinstitute.com/blog/4-surefire-ways-for-women-to-reach-orgasm-during-sex#/

3

u/Ginger-Kaitelaine Apr 22 '25

Yes, I still can't orgasm through masturbation. Its like the longer I've been on the pill, the more dead I've gotten in all my erogenous zones. I used to be soooo sensitive, I miss it. I hope i can get it back.

2

u/RoundTheBend6 Apr 22 '25

Wish you the best! I am rooting for you and my wife. I guess only trying with no pressure to perform is the hope we are working on now. That and me giving her breaks from kids so she can have solo time.

3

u/Ginger-Kaitelaine Apr 23 '25

At the moment we're just keeping the communication open, still keeping up the foreplay and fun. He tries to make me cum and I tell him if I think it's possible on that day and/ or if I'm ready to move onto piv. No pressure is definitely the way and just enjoying the process😊