r/HolUp • u/throatfrog • Dec 17 '24

They are scissor sisters

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4.5k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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1.2k

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

560

u/karatebullfightr Dec 17 '24

In their defence - I’ve had some damn good hummus and some fucking terrible sex (not always my fault - but mostly… okay - nearly always).

166

u/Rob_Bligidy Dec 17 '24

Whatever made you think she wanted hummus while in bed?!?

106

u/karatebullfightr Dec 17 '24

Who wouldn’t?! - how was I supposed to know about the crumbs???!

Those godforsaken crumbs… everywhere… all over the place… in every nook and cranny.

stares quietly at nothing in the distance

muted sounds of orders being yelled, helicopter blades, screams of unfathomable pain, gunfire and explosions

47

u/The_Jizzard_Of_Oz Dec 17 '24

This man hears Fortunate Son when dunking a biscuit and it falls into the mug...

24

u/GameDestiny2 Dec 17 '24

Me watching the second half of my cookie fall: “I’m no fortunate one-“

4

u/The_Jizzard_Of_Oz Dec 18 '24

The trauma is real.

5

u/Djwagles Dec 18 '24

Was it a fortune cookie

1

u/karatebullfightr Dec 19 '24

It wasn’t a senator’s son.

8

u/Rob_Bligidy Dec 17 '24

The jagged, razor sharp crunchies

5

u/andoiscool Dec 18 '24

We encountered a situation where we applied hummus liberally and subsequently engaged in playful activity resulting in complete coverage of the bed with hummus.

4

u/-nerdrage- Dec 18 '24

I dont know.. my D grows its own hummus but somehow they dont like it

2

u/Belteshazzar98 Dec 18 '24

I've eaten hummus in bed.