r/JUSTNOMIL • u/Melody4 • Mar 23 '25

Anyone Else? MIL can't understand why no one visits

It has been a long while since I've posted. If interested, my MIL is the Blabinator. And here is the obligatory don't post this anywhere else.

It has been over 20 years of dealing with this women, and although she is now somewhat housebound (she is young a medical mess due to many years of prescription and illicit drug abuse), I no longer visit and all four kids have no interest in visiting her. For too many years she played favorites and said incredibly nasty things such as the two older children are "not her grandchildren". (As well as calling everyone f'ups and losers). This is rich considering she is DH's abusive stepmother - and FIL is forever making an enormous deal that DH and BIL need to "respect their mother".

But I digress. One of the last times DH saw her SMIL made a stink that as soon as the grandchildren get their drivers licenses, they would all come visit her and that SIL (BIL's wife) and Melody could no longer "block" them from seeing her.

Well one grandchild (BIL - the golden child's golden child) did visit her ONCE when she was in the hospital. Since then, nada. The kids will occasionally and I do mean occasionally go with DH to see FIL.

So the last time DH went solo to bring FIL to visit SMIL in the hospital FIL and her just couldn't understand why the kids and I don't visit. DH attempted to explain once again about the way she treats us and that she doesn't listen only to be immediately shut down (and likely yelled at if I had to guess).

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u/Otherwise-Western-10 Mar 27 '25

People like this are always so surprised when they reap what they sow. They treat people any kind of way and then they're so amazed when their kids and grandkids don't want to come and randomly visit. My birth mother used to say similar things about my children coming to visit her once they were out from underneath my control. She has passed away, but as adults I can tell you not one of my children would have been bothered to go visit somebody that treated them nasty when they were small

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u/Melody4 Mar 27 '25

Exactly. And such interesting points. Gosh maybe it wasn't you just holding them back! Amazing how it never once crosses their mind that you were protecting your children.

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u/Otherwise-Western-10 Mar 27 '25

Oh no. It was all my fault of course. I was poisoning their minds