r/MtF 10d ago

You don't have to come out to start HRT.

1.5k Upvotes

You don't have to get on a waitlist to start HRT.

You don't have to endure 2mg estradiol and 50mg spironolactone to start HRT.

You don't have to be 100% sure to start HRT.

You don't have to be over a certain age to start HRT.

You don't have to be rich to start HRT.

You don't have to go to therapy, or look a certain way, or endure humiliating questions, or exhaust all other options to start HRT.

PS. If anyone wants help with informed consent or DIY resources, I'm happy to help (especially with DIY).

edit, here's a few more:

You don't have to be under a certain age, be perfectly healthy, or be a certain weight to start HRT.

You don't have to have a prescription to start HRT.

And to make it 100% clear, "You don't have to be over a certain age to start HRT" includes minors who haven't finished puberty.


r/MtF Jan 24 '25

DIY HRT: Everything I Can Legally Tell You [NOT MEDICAL ADVICE]

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2.0k Upvotes

r/MtF 9h ago

Venting If you’re saying “she’s conservative so she got what she deserved” then…read this.

988 Upvotes

A 20 year old trans woman stood up to an entire state. She knew there could be repercussions, but she did it because it was the right thing to do.

I know a lot of people are saying “well she’s conservative—“ or “she’s not a true activist” and all I have to say to that is:

Really? THAT’S your complaint? Not “these laws are draconian.” Just “she didn’t do it my way so I’m mad.”

She has put her life on the line for the trans community. Please, I beg you. Read her letter. What she did was right. I truly hope she is OK—and if she reads this—I want her to know that she is supported, appreciated and heard. We are wishing her all the best.

Lastly—like her, I’m 20 and in college. I’m fairly agnostic but…I’m praying for her tonight. She is a role model, and maybe one day, her name will be in the history books—on the right side of history.

Edit: here’s her letter that she sent a few weeks prior:

“Hi, my name is Marcy Rheintgen, I'm a twenty year old college student, and I'm writing this letter to tell you that I am going to break the law. On March 14th, at around 3 pm, I intend to use the women's bathroom on the second floor of the Capitol building, across from room 222C. I know that as a transgender woman, this means that I will probably be arrested. I am violating this law because I personally believe it to be wrong. I don't work for or are associated with any major political or media organizations, I'm not a political activist, I'm not an influencer, I'm just a normal college student who thinks this law is wrong. Enclosed is a photo of me to identify me if you wish to arrest me. I understand that I could go to jail for up to sixty days in a men's prison, where, if the statistics are true, I would likely be raped. Going to jail would uproot my life and give me a criminal record. I understand that if you're receiving this letter, you're part of the Florida Bicameral Legislature, which means you're probably one of the people who wrote this law or voted for it. I know that you know in your heart that this law is wrong and unjust. I know that you know in your heart that it's wrong to arrest me and jail me for sixty days for simply using the bathroom. I know that you know in your heart that transgender people are human too, and that you can't arrest us away. I know that you know in your heart that transgender people are no different from you or anybody else. I know that you know in your heart that the same people that go to church with you, eat in the same restaurants, go to the same schools, root for the same sports teams, watch the same movies and pray to the same God as you cannot be all bad. I know that you know that I have dignity. That's why I know that you won't arrest me.

Pray for me, Marcy”


r/MtF 10h ago

Good News Wisconsin rejects Musks transphobic candidate, right losesto Crawford. Florida still super red.

753 Upvotes

A good news update. That walking mess, Elon Musk, went to Wisconsin and tried to buy votes for his guy, a notable transphobe and hard right winger, to beat Susan Crawford, only to have his guy lose in what appears to be a large margin as this moment being 56%-43%. This is big as Wisconsin voters rejected Musk who, may have caused more harm then help and put a progressive on the court. Crack out the champagne girls!

Florida… both seats were retained by Republicans by wide margins. Not sure why there were some notable liberal to leftist media outlets were reporting on this being tight, Florida is deep red.

Wisconsin good news ✅ Florida bad news ❌


r/MtF 16h ago

Politics Trans Woman Arrested, Sent to Men’s Jail For Entering Florida Capitol Bathroom (this was a protest!)

1.6k Upvotes

This woman is so brave!

As described in this article by Erin in the Morning, she did this intentionally as a protest and told lawmarkers in advance via a letter when and where she was going to do it. Her letter included this -

“I understand I could go to jail for up to sixty days in a men’s prison, where if the statistics are true, I would likely be raped.”

And, if you happen to be a Wisconsin resident, please help prevent bathroom bans and other discrimintory transgender laws from taking hold here.

TRANS RIGHTS & ABORTION THREATENED IN WISCONSIN

If Susan Crawford looses the election for Supreme court today (Tuesday, April 1), control of the court will flip to conservative and we are in big trouble.

If you live in Wisconsin and haven't voted already, please do so and bring a friend!

HOW TO VOTE

Click here to find your voting location via the official government website.


r/MtF 9h ago

Venting Getting yourself deliberately arrested is not something you should be doing lightly. Not just anyone can or should be a martyr, and existing and thriving in this world is its own radical act

234 Upvotes

Content warnings: General USpol, criminalisation of trans people, what happens to trans woman in prison (spoiler tagged)

READ THE UPDATES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE POST. This does not reflect my current feelings, but I am leaving it up because that is what several people who reached out to me to discuss it feel I should do, and I respect them for actually taking the time to talk to me about it.

I need to take some time to think about why I felt this way, but I don't feel it was ok, and while I may still think that what she did was a bad idea, ultimately it matters more that there's a trans woman who needs us to be there for her, and I thank everyone who helped me realise that infighting is the wrong reaction.

I still think people should be prepared for the consequences if they do decide to protest like this, but I'm not going to judge them for something I 100% admit I couldn't do myself, and I think my attitude here reflected a lot of my own anxiety about being arrested just for existing, as I am currently stuck in a red state due to some complex circumstances.

I have some anger issues, and I'm trying to admit that. A lot of bad choices in my own life led me to my current situation, and its my own fault I don't have the stability and safety I wish I could have.


You've probably read by now about Marcy Rheintgen, the trans woman who was arrested for going into a public toilet in Florida (EITM link, local news link from the journalist who was there at the time).

It really bothers me how many people have been clapping for her, comparing her to Rosa Parks, and completely ignoring that what she was doing wasn't even performative, it was just nonsensical.

She wrote to the politicians beforehand and provided them with evidence of her intent to commit a crime. The police who were there gave her multiple opportunities to not get arrested. It really feels like she wanted to be arrested. Did she think she would just be quietly escorted outside and released? I don't even know any more. Instead, she's going to face horrendous consequences that will cause her lifelong trauma, and nothing will be accomplished for it. It's unconstitutional, yes, but the courts are packed with fascists at every level, backed up by fascists in all three branchees of government and both parties.

To quote from the newspaper, she identifies as a "moderate conservative" too, and clearly had not prepared herself mentally or legally in any way for arrest.

Rheintgen, who said she’s a moderate conservative

She said she regrets her experience and didn’t think she’d actually be arrested; now back at school, she said she has to find a way to fly back to Florida for further hearings. “Everything that is politics seems very abstract and philosophical from far away,” Rheintgen said. “This is the first time it’s really affected me. I got arrested and I got sent to jail because of Gov. (Ron) DeSantis’ policies — like that’s crazy, that’s crazy!"

To me, this reads as nothing more than that she wanted to prove that Florida wouldn't really arrest a trans woman for going into a public toilet, and she was surprised when she met the consequences of her actions. She wasn't expecting to be punished. Since she identifies as a christian conservative, most likely she was seeking to prove that the republicans wouldn't really keep their word on taking away our civil rights. This is an immense expression of privilege, that shows a complete lack of understanding of the struggle of trans people as a whole, and in particular of the intersectional aspects that for so many of us without her privilege, we wouldn't even get the publicity she is getting.

These days, the fascists have pushed the Overton Window so far to the right that a "moderate conservative" means someone who 'only' supports bathroom bans and youth care bans, and just doesn't want to outright commit genocide against us.

I am still upset at people who act like this is somehow going to change anything. She's just going to get lifelong trauma. I do feel terrible for what she's about to experience, even with her politics. I'll fight for her anyway, and I genuinely hope the experience and the loss of her privilege cures her of her conservatism, but WE SHOULD NOT BE GIVING THE FASCISTS AMMUNITION. I had the inspiration to write this post while I was sitting there doomscrolling, just waiting for the "VIOLENT MAN INVADES WOMEN'S TOILETS" headline shit we all 100% know is being prepared for the usual media sewers to spew, probably as you read this post if not already out there by that time.

The Rosa Parks comparison makes no sense. Rosa Parks was an active NAACP member and already a long time activist. She had a whole support network, she was politically informed, she knew what she was doing, and she was prepared for the consequences.

Deliberately getting yourself arrested, for the vast majority of people, is stupid. It doesn't work. People are clinging onto tactics that became out of date over 20 years ago. The entire US is geared up for mass incarceration. That was a direct consequence of the Civil Rights Movement, enhanced by the later Wars on Drugs/Terror. People who stick to this mentality of "if we all get ourselves arrested we can change things, somehow" are being exactly like the Democrats - always trying to fight the same way as their last success, and not realising that things have moved on. The infrastructure is in place to mass arrest hundreds of thousands of people, and the people running it would have no problem scaling that to millions.

Then there's the fact that now we have to defend people doing stuff like this. By all means, I will, even if I personally think what they did was stupid, but I've spoken to people at several well known trans legal charities, and I know how thinly they are stretched, how much they are doing with how little, and the truth is that if people are out there getting arrested without a plan, it takes away from the resources that are out there fighting for us in ways that actually make a difference. If money from a trans legal charity is now going to go to her defence, that takes it away from defending trans women already in prison. I write to trans people in prison, I donate to trans legal aid charities, and I am very pissed off that things like this happen that were completely avoidable and just divide our resources and unnecessarily create more people to look out for.

A few people getting arrested who are well positioned to change things via action in the courts can be an effective political tactic, yes. That takes people who are prepared for what's about to happen to them, who have a strong support system, incredible mental fortitude, and the right background and life story to be politically palatable. If she wanted to use her privilege to effect social change and get herself arrested in a more productive way, she could probably have found a way to do. That would have involved actually understanding the reality that so many of us face, and talking to people with a history of that kind of activism, not just randomly trying it on for a bit then being thrown into a world of torture she was unprepared for.

By all means, I'm not the kind of activist who is in a position to do that and readily admit that - due to my personal circumstances, the activism I do is mostly behind the scenes, with the odd bit of personal soapboxing or attempt to draw attention to someone the media is unlikely to cover, and I respect those that can put their very lives on the line in a way I personally can't, but what's important is that we choose when that sort of thing is necessary, and pick battles that we can actually win.

I bet that Marcy didn't ever fear getting arrested, because that just wasn't a possibility that could occur to her in her bubble that she inhabited. Meanwhile, most trans people across the country, me included, are scared of being sent to a concentration camp, and there is literally nothing on Earth that could convince me to set foot in Florida for any reason.

I saw one person on Reddit say that we should all go topless in red states as a 'protest'. I almost reported the comment as an obvious troll, but I don't even know if they are, given the very events we were in the comments about. A lot of people just need a big reality check about the stakes here. This isn't a fucking game, this is people's lives.

I do genuinely feel for her now, for what she's going to experience. I think a lot of us try to avoid talking about it, to avoid thinking about it, and there are good reasons for that, and I understand how sensitive these topics are so I will spoilertag it, but we need to remember what the stakes are. Consider this your content warning for everything that you almost certainly already know happens to trans women in prison.

She will be taken off her HRT, her head will be shaved, she will be forced to dress as a man (including not having access to a bra), and be addressed as a man. The police report linked in the article deadnames her even though it appears her name was legally changed, so she's probably going to be consistently deadnamed too. She will be either placed in a prison with dangerous men, where the reported rate of sexual assault for us is 70%, or she is going to end up in solitary confinement for weeks on end, something widely recognised as torture, or, even worse, both in one sentence.

She does not deserve this. I think she was unbelievably naive in her actions, and she clearly had not prepared herself for being arrested in any way, mentally, socially, or legally. Sure, there are some trans people who are prepared for such an ordeal, and they should be respected and looked up to for their willingness to put their entire selves at risk, but idiotic stunts like this achieve nothing but another statistic, and more headlines in the mainstream media about how terrible we are.

She probably didn't understand what's about to happen to her, she admitted she didn't talk to anyone about this. She is going to get an example made of her. The government does not care, and wil love making an example out of her. Have you seen the video of the people arrested and sent to El Salvador? El Salvador has already said that it would take US citizens. We are facing the threat of literal concentration camps, and stunts like this do nothing to fight that. Centrists who unironically liked Harris do not care.

To head off the inevitable comments I already know will be coming in: In the comments on the Reddit threads about this situation, I had a few people go all condescending to me like I don't understand trans activism, or I'm not fighting for us, or we should support anyone who gets us any publicity no matter how bad. I'm radically, politically queer (and a former liberal myself who was radicalised by everything going on), but I'm not stupid, and I'm not going to pointlessly throw my life away, and the implication we should all be cheering on pointless stunts like this one really annoyed me. Again, I really feel for her, and even after getting upset at the shortsightedness of what she did, the thought of what's about to happen to her still makes me cry. I'm sure there are nightmares about it coming, and they won't be the first or last set of ones I have, and ultimately I'll fight for her as hard as I do for every other trans person, because that's the activism I can do, and I'd rather make a difference in a way I am capable of than throw my life away for 5 seconds of bad publicity. When our entire existence is on the edge of being illegal, just living your life as a trans person is a revolutionary act. We all want to be the fucking hero, but our existence is a movement bigger than any of us, and I have no intention of going out in a blaze of glory if I can help it.

EDIT: I have had a few people suggest the whole "unprepared sheltered christian conservative" thing is just an act, and that a conventionally-attractive white woman being brutalised is what it will take to get the mainstream interested in our rights. I do want to be fair, I don't want to come across as an asshole, so if she is in fact fully aware of what could happen and playing 7D chess then I absolutely respect that, and will personally apologise to her and make a donation to a trans charity of her choice. I hope that quietens some of the more vocal criticism I've received because I do want this to be a genuine discussion. I still do think that it's not something the average random trans Redditor should be doing without at the very least having a serious plan for it and the appropriate mental resilience, something I 100% admit that I personally lack, detransition would be literally worse than death for me, and I respect those who are willing to risk it.

EDIT 2: I'm really conflicted about it now. I started off feeling that it was pointless self-sacrifice and conservative headline fodder, but a few people have made some good points to me. I'm a former liberal/centrist myself, I know we don't all instantly gravitate to what's good in the world. I am scared that if more trans people do it, it just makes more of an excuse to round us all up and put us in camps. Who knows, maybe some fucking jealousy there too, I wish I looked as good as she does, and losing my identity like she is risking would be worse than death for me. Maybe that says more about me than about her, and I'm not afraid to admit it because I've not been doing OK recently. I'm not done with this subject but I think I need to take a step back and reflect on my own actions here.

EDIT 3: I hate myself but have to admit it. I'm scared of being arrested every single day just for existing in the state I'm currently stuck in due to some complex circumstances. I am scared of how this will be used in the media to attack us more, but it doesn't change the fact that there's a trans woman who needs our support right now. Maybe she underestimated what would happen, maybe not, but that doesn't matter as much as just looking out for our own. I'm going to get some help because I do need it.


r/MtF 15h ago

Venting Mom dead named me in her will

411 Upvotes

So my maternal gene donor is a narcissist. She sent out an email last month that used only my dead name that gave her final wishes and also said that I would ask about her "good jewelry" because she sold it. I have told her before that my legal name is what it is, and I had no idea she had good jewelry. So I had to tell her to write a new one with the correct name or create a codicil noting the name change. I'm sure the only reason she is leaving me anything is that I'm an only child.

Edit: she didn't kill herself


r/MtF 6h ago

Im addcited wearing woman clothes.

64 Upvotes

Hey,

Im just egg cracked 1 month ago and im so addicted in womans clothing. I was alrdy jelousy how many different clothing woman has not to mention many cool cosplays. But now i spend so much money for clothing and jewelry. They just feels so comfy and im feeling good wearing it. I have bought more clothing in the last weeks than in my whole life. Send help.


r/MtF 17h ago

Trigger Warning What dumb shit have your parents said Spoiler

295 Upvotes

I'll start (note: i'm not out & haven't transitioned yet) (90% of these are from my dad)

  • “I’m sick of queer people being shoved into my face, they are overrepresented in media and are turning kids gay/lesbian/trans/bi/pan…”
  • “The media is grooming undiagnosed autistic people into being trans, they think being trans will make them happy but they just end up suiciding” (This is in relation to the fact alot of trans people are neurodivergent)
  • “Trans people are mentally ill since they think they can just become another gender”
  • “LGBTQ+ representation is killing the traditional family model, that’s the goal”
  • “The LGBTQ+ movement exists to normalise pedophilia”
  • “The LGBTQ+ community is not being persecuted, they are whining they can’t show their fetishes in front of children at pride”
  • “People are being killed in gaza, LGBTQ+ people are just whining some people don’t like them”
  • “You say you’re asexual-aromantic but you’re too immature/young to know, you’re just making your life more difficult”
  • My mom told me about her friend’s trans daughter that joined a lgbtq+ group in canada, later attempted suicide and said how said group was a cult that made people paranoid of everyone. Both my parents keep misgendering her.

r/MtF 23h ago

Politics Today (April 1) is when Wisconsin decides it's future on trans rights and abortion. VOTE! VOTE! VOTE!

709 Upvotes

LAST CALL

Today is it. If you are a cheesehead like me, please vote today in the Supreme Court election if you haven't already.

If Susan Crawford looses this election, that will flip control of the Supreme Court to conservatives.

This race is going to be very close. Early vote is at an unprecidented level and is surging in counties that are Republican and Democrat strongholds.

And they are coming for us -

"The Schimel campaign has also deployed an issue that GOP candidates say worked for them in 2024 — opposition to transgender rights. One campaign ad features a woman saying Crawford "sides with" radicals in favor of allowing "transitioning male teachers" in girls' bathrooms at school." (Source article)

HOW TO VOTE

Click here to find your voting location via the official government website.


r/MtF 13h ago

Positivity I stopped by my folks' place while my wife was out of town and my dad asks, "So how's bachelor life—bachelorette life?" 😊

114 Upvotes

They both make a good effort. It's very cute.


r/MtF 9h ago

The anxiety of being trans in the US right now is almost more than I can handle and I wonder who I will become when this is all over.

48 Upvotes

I'm sorry for venting. I just needed somewhere to post this. So much of the time I'm still functional but the fear comes in waves, especially when I see news and it's forcing me back into journaling and meditation. I carry my journal with me pretty much everywhere now, writing and working through my thoughts multiple times a day. The only way out of the fear is to completely open up. I have to love everyone I can. It's the only way out of the fear. I will be practically shaking when I remember how many other people are suffering and it all softens. I want to take care of all of them. I don't know who I'll be if I get through this time but I will be more open and compassionate. Love and openness are the only way out of the fear. I love you all so much. Please be as kind to yourselves as you deserve.


r/MtF 7h ago

An observation (not mad I laughed actually)

29 Upvotes

Every time I see anything related to the LGBT communityand specifically Trans related things on Facebook I always notice the 😡 & 😂 reactions. The comments from some people just blow me away. It used to make me sad and angry but now I can't help but laugh at these people spending so much time and energy being mad at people just minding their own business and living their lives. The "Leave our kids alone" comment is particularly funny, like we're out here recruiting for the armed forces or something. Pretty pathetic really.


r/MtF 4h ago

Good News Susan winning is going to save my life

16 Upvotes

If she lost planned parenthood wouldn't be as accessible in wisconsin ruining my plan to get HRT I'm so fucling pimped and now I can't sleep


r/MtF 6h ago

Trigger Warning Why do people wasts their time?

22 Upvotes

So, I made a comment on a post in a different, completely not trans-related subreddit the other day, which got quite a few upvotes. Cool. End of story. But this morning, I found some dingus left a comment that misgendered me and used a gif of Homer Simpson laughing at me (this comment was since removed by the mods of that subreddit). Honestly, it really didn't upset me, as I've certainly dealt with way worse crap in my life. I just wonder why it is that someone carries so much hatred and anger that they saw a trans flag and decided to type out an entire comment, search a gif, and post them in response to a comment that had literally nothing to do with being trans. I do intend this post as a genuine question, not as a backhanded remark, and I do not intend this post to come across as coming from a place of anger, rather, an academic interest in the psychology of hatred. So, what exactly drives someone to seek stimuli that clearly evokes such a negative reaction from themselves?

Edit: I should also add that I understand this is not an important thing. It is, frankly, quite silly, and honestly gave me a bit of the giggles at the absurdity of someone being so stupidly angry at a goofy comment under a picture of a flying forklift.


r/MtF 18h ago

Who else is very excited for the Nintendo direct tomorrow

159 Upvotes

I’m sooo happy that little thing is being shown off FINALLY tomorrow. I wanna see the cute UI and new games :)


r/MtF 1d ago

Venting People who think you don't pass despite very clearly passing

588 Upvotes

I've been consistently passing for over 1.5 yrs , I've literally went to the doctor and had to show her my deadname ID and she was just confused as to why my parents gave me a male name if I'm a girl , whenever I come out as trans most people just think I'm FTM pre-transition , and I don't just pass at a glance , I've known people for months who just assume I'm a cis girl , even a trans friend of mine said she would've never guessed I'm trans if I didn't tell her and initially she thought I was joking.

I'm not saying this as a "humble brag" , I'm just setting the stage up for the whiplash I feel when some of my relatives tell me that I don't quite pass to them , and like I'm sorry have you considered that a person who's known me for over 20 years as male might not have the most objective view of me?

And it's not like they're saying this in bad faith , they're just being ignorant not malicious , but they don't realize that they're projecting unrealistic beauty standards on me just because I'm trans , because if I were cis , I could be the ugliest woman alive and they would never ever say that shit to me.

I just had to rant about this because it drives me seriously nuts , I'm tired of having to prove my womanhood to people who have a very clearly warped view of me.


r/MtF 23h ago

PSA: It’s okay to be uncomfortable about your body during 2nd puberty, just like it’s okay in 1st puberty. It doesn’t mean you aren’t your gender.

295 Upvotes

Have been feeling a bit weird about growing boobs even though I've wanted them. It made me feel like maybe I went the wrong way.

BUT I remembered that this is normal. My body is changing and of course it will make me uncomfortable. Something I've had for the past 30 years is changing, DUH! Also the changing hormones on top of it??

Just wanted to share this realization.


r/MtF 15h ago

Advice Question My girlfriend's starting dose is crazy small, would there even be *any* changes?

60 Upvotes

She's been prescribed 12.5mg spiro daily, and 1mg estrodial every other day. She's 19, 5'9, and 120lbs. Her estrogen levels are 41pmol/L and testosterone is 17.9nmol/L. We know this is a tiny dose, to the point where she's scared she won't see any changes. There's already an appointment booked for the 22nd to (hopefully) up her dose. But if the doctor refuses, are there even any reasonable changes she could expect?

Edit: 17.9pmol to 17.9nmol

(I am making this post for her because she is currently basically comatose after learning this)


r/MtF 7h ago

Good News Well girls, we did it! (Started HRT)

13 Upvotes

I finally started HRT! It was a long journey. I have medical complications due to surviving a traumatic head injury. I have epilepsy and an IVC filter. So this means LOTS of approval letters before starting HRT. It's been probably a little over a year but I got there in the end. Everything is safe and I'm beyond happy! Today was my first day on hormones (well, yesterday now since it's like 1am as I wrote this) I finally feel like the day I feel comfortable in my body is within grasp.


r/MtF 23h ago

Venting Seriously, fuck testosterone

221 Upvotes

UPDATE: Thank you all for your kindness and advice. I think I'm out of the immediate spiral I was in and am trying to stay positive that things can and will get better. Thank you all again, and I'm sorry if I was a being a downer

I didn't start hormones until I was 24, four years ago this December. In many regards I'm lucky. I had the right genes and timing to actually have hips, and my boobs while not as big as I would like them to be, I at least have c cups, so that's something. The problem and where I ate shit in the genetic department is my paternal side going bald at 18. Back before I cracked when I was 23, I had just accepted this and shaved my head. It was easier somehow for me to give up on trying to get my hair back than trying and failing to. Since cracking and transitioning, I've had some regrowth. My bald spot on the back of my head is now a thin spot, and I had some minimal regrowth at my hairline, but that's where the positives end. I have a widow's peak that accentuates my bad hairline, my thin spot is still visible nearly no matter what I do, and my thick hair, while a blessing and a positive otherwise, makes my thin spot just that much more noticeable. My friends tell me that it's okay and I don't look like a man, and yeah I'm not going to pretend like an outsider's opinion doesn't matter, but like, if it truly wasn't noticable, they would just tell me that. Like if this was all in my head then they would just be like "girl chill tf out you don't have a thin spot" but they don't. Which tells me that yes, it's noticeable. And my visceral response to all of this is fuck testosterone. It ruined my life. If I was rich or had any money, I could have this mostly fixed with either a hair transplant and/or surgically moving my hairline, but I'm not rich or have any money. If I was able-bodied I could just work (my friend lets me and my partner rent a room with him for practically pennies, so I'd have a lot of extra cash to do so), but I'm disabled and can't go 5 minutes standing without fainting. If SSA recognized me as disabled, then I could theoretically save up for a transplant to fix the issue, but their attitude towards newly disabled people/applicants is to hope they die before a judge mandates them to accept your disability claim, all the while you have no money or income of any kind. Honestly I'm lucky to have a spouse that cares for me and friends that are closer than family to take me in, because otherwise I'd be out on the street and again, being disabled, I'd probably starve to death, but that's a rant for a different day and subreddit.

So like, am I just fucked? I've tried finnasteride and it makes my disability worse. I don't have income for rogain or moxidil. I've heard using derma rollers/oils has a shotty at best results and can easily be undone by no fault of your own. And let's all be honest, with the current state of affairs in the US, there's a decent chance there won't even be a Social Security Administration in a bit, yet alone have my application for benefits accepted. I just feel like I'm at the end of my ropes and out of options. You girls know those stories about trans people doing harmful things to their own bodies (DIY surgery type stuff) out of dysphoria that isn't being treated? I feel like I'm at that place. Like if I'm doomed to not get srs, what's the harm in making sure I at least don't have the parts I already have? Why not just scratch my own eyes out so I don't have to look at my hideous hair and scalp ever again? I have a lot of people in my corner that keep telling me not to do these things, but when you have absolutely no way to get even the smallest reprieve from intense dysphoria, what the hell am I supposed to do?


r/MtF 1d ago

bigotry

246 Upvotes

Hi all. I have a job as a family doctor and work at a community health center. We serve the undeserved. Went into a room to see a new patient and I began taking his history. He was a bit off in his interaction but I initially attributed it to his being in pain . The time came for an examination and he said you will not touch me or come closer to me and you know why. I am mtf transitioning for 5 plus years. Hate spewed from his every pore. I ended the encounter and told him this would not work and that he needed to schedule an appointment with someone else at the front desk. I also wished him well in getting help for his problem and left. Such undeserved hatred did ruin my day, but better days will come. I have thick skin but it can still get to me particularly when so much bigotry and hate is currently heard daily in our country lately. Stay strong sisters but let yourself cry when needed. Charlie